[Copypasta] So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix.

So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behaviour. For example, if you eat it is likely that you swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that because that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why am I writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging shit again and I am not sure how to respond to that.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Doublelift dodges Imaqtpie in queue

twitchquotes: Doublelift fired up his stream for another day of soloQ, but foolishly forgot to check if Imaqtpie was in a game. He opened up QT’s stream to find him sitting in queue… He frantically began tabbing between his client and QT’s stream, then one after the other… both queues popped. “I need the toilet” he said to his chat. He ran to the wall and unplugged his internet. He was safe for another day.
twitch chat
March 2017
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

A middle-aged man complaining about an online card game

twitchquotes: ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ-ᴀɢᴇᴅ ᴍᴀɴ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴄʜɪʟᴅʀᴇɴ ʙᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴀɴ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴄᴀʀᴅ ɢᴀᴍᴇ. ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴘᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ $4.99 ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ sᴏ. ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴄᴏɴsɪᴅᴇʀ ᴘᴜᴛᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ɪɴ ᴘᴇʀsᴘᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʙɪɢ ʙᴀʙʏ.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Disgrace to all Morosans

twitchquotes: Octavian Morosan, this is your great great grandparrian, I am contacting you from beyond the grave to tell you that you are a disgrace to all Morosans because of your recent switch to being a casual. Pls no Maserati
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

FeelsOldMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣯⣭⣭⣝⣛⠿⢿⣛⣿⣛⣛⡻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⡭⠖⡑⢈⢿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣷⣭⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⣯⣥⣿⣒⡽⡎⢚⣕⣛⠿⢿⣿⣿⡎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣱⣾⣿⢫⣷⣿⣿⠛⣋⡍⣥⡴⣶⣶⣄⢖⢘⣽⣓⢒⡆⡴⣶⠖⣼⢻⣿ ⣿⡿⣳⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠑⠹⣃⣥⡶⣒⣒⠒⠮⠥⠌⡘⠫⠬⠕⢶⣋⠬⠟⡃⢿ ⡿⣭⣿⡋⢿⣿⣿⣿⣵⣵⡛⣯⢡⡥⠄⠄⢉⠉⣍⡑⡰⣀⣭⠍⠲⢀⠈⠹⡶⢸ ⢳⣽⡿⣿⣷⣜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣲⡘⢧⣤⣶⣬⡶⢞⣡⢆⠻⣿⣦⣥⣶⣶⠶⣰⣿ ⣿⣸⣇⣿⣿⣿⡞⣾⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠶⠶⠂⢾⣿⣶⣿⣓⠂⠄⠐⢀⠴⣾⣿⣿ ⡻⣯⢻⣽⣿⣿⢧⣿⡷⣿⡿⣫⣵⡷⣛⣯⣭⣟⡷⣯⣯⣷⣛⣛⡛⢶⣥⡘⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣧⣝⣛⣣⣿⣿⡿⡑⣺⢿⢿⣿⢏⡵⡶⠋⣝⣻⣏⡐⠌⠻⣿⠆⣮⡻⡘⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡳⠔⠥⠡⠍⣀⡻⠿⠿⠷⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢟⣊⢃⣰⣿ ⡽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣯⣻⢿⣿⣧⡹⡶⣤⣬⣝⣛⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣛⢛⣼⣿⣿ ⠄⠙⠲⠭⣽⣛⣻⠿⢷⣿⣿⣷⢹⣽⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣻⣽⢟⡿⣣⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠛⠛⠒⠒⠒⠺⣧⡟⣿⣿⣟⣿⣷⣧⣿⢟⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣹⡟⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣾⣾⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021

Pepe

Trollge emote smiling

⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠚⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠰⠶⠿⢰⣿⣶⣦⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣦⡄⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠉⣉⣉⣩⣥⡶⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣻⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢠⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟⠃⡀⠀⢠⣿⠟⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣄⠀⣤⣤⣤⢰⣿⡦⣿⠀⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠛⠀⠛⠛⠋⠈⠉⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢴⡆⣤⣤⣄⡄⢀⣀⣀⢀⣀⢀⡄⠀⢨⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠃⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣿⡋⣿⠏⠛⣃⣤⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣄⣠⣤⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁
June 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing