[Copypasta] Marginally optimizing a children's game!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, loyal fan chiming in here (for once). I think your stream is great! I would have spent my time working towards a cure for cancer, or how to automate food production in the 3rd world, but luckily i stumbled onto your stream and now I can waste my time watching you marginally optimize a children's game! What a career you have made!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
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More Kripp Copypastas

Russkis of Easterino

twitchquotes: Guten tag mutterfugers. Das ist Gestrud Hitlerino of 1945. We are in need of assisterino for defeating the Russkis of Easterino. If you would lend your Mods to assisterino, we would be danke and one with stream. Please no copy seig heil pasta
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Kripp's history

twitchquotes: Paparrian was born in Germany, the youngest of the five children (three of whom survived) of Hanz Hector Paparrian, from a noble family of the province of Freiberg. In 1932, he began his medical career in Theodor Meynert's psychiatric clinic at the Trollstein General Hospital. The same year, he married Mamarrian, the granddaughter of Isaac Bernays, a chief rabbi in Hamburg. In the summer of 1935, the couple had a beautiful and gifted child: Kripp. On 15 September 1935, Hitler presented two laws who deprived so-called "non-Aryans" of the benefits of German citizenship. The young parents, extremely afraid for the future of their beautiful child, where confronted to a question that would forever change the fate of the world: was Krip Aryan?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp stop showing your knee on stream

twitchquotes: Kripp stop showing your knee on the stream, dont be like other female streamers. We are interested in your personality and not body.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp should change his name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp
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