[Copypasta] John Xina needs your credit card info

🚨🚨CALLING ALL TENCENT GAMERS🚨🚨 JOHN XINA 🇨🇳🍦LOST HIS SOCIAL CREDIT 🤯 🤭AND NEEDS YOUR HELP TO GET IT BACK 👍👍🇨🇳 ALL HE NEEDS IS THE 1️⃣2️⃣ DIGITS ON YOUR SOCIAL CREDIT CARD 💳 ALONG WITH THE EXPIRATION DATE 📅 AND THOSE 3️⃣ WACKY DIGITS ON THE BACK 🇨🇳🇨🇳🇨🇳🍦
November 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021

With love from me, your dad, to you, my son

twitchquotes: Sebastian Fors, I think it'll be hard for you to take this in but here go. I've wanted to write you this message since the day you started streaming. Though I'm not happy how you act here, roleplaying and god knows what while streaming. But you know that I will allways love you. I'm coming to dreamhack this summer and I'll finally get to meet you. If you remember your mother, Hafu, you will understand why leaving you with her was my only option... I have not been the greatest father... but I'll allways love you and care for you. Even though people call you a roleplayer I will allways protect you. WIth love from me, your dad, to you, my son. - Trump
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once. He comes is and is posturing like he’s really tall and large but the guy couldn’t be more than 5’4”. The class starts and he is just sitting there in quietly staring forward in the front of the class with an awfully distorted picture of his face that said “The required information is in the lab directions” but he never handed us anything. This goes on for a minute until one of the talkative kids just asks if he is okay he hadn’t even taken a breath yet and veins were popping out of his neck and forehead. The moment the kid made a noise he stated wildly shaking his head around while making high pitched laser(?) sounds. Worst period of geology I’ve ever had. The rest was just him passing out the lab sheet but he would just hold it toward them motionless until they reached for it and he would snatch it away and laugh at them right in their face. Couldn’t find a more fucked guy if I tried. I'll edit in the image if anyone got a pic of it.
March 2022
Jerma985

Tuck Frump into bed

twitchquotes: I would tuck frump into bed every night if I could
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

my face when americans call chips "french fries"

>my face when americans call chips "french fries" >my face when americans call crisps "chips" >my face when americans call chocolate globbernaughts "candy bars" >my face when americans call motorized rollinghams "cars" >my face when americans call merry fizzlebombs "fireworks" >my face when americans call wunderbahboxes a "PC" >my face when americans call meat water "gravy" >my face when americans call electro-rope "power cables" >my face when americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a "burger" >my face when americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblers "pens" >my face when americans call twisting plankhandles "doorknobs" >my face when americans call breaddystack a "sandwich" >my face when americans call their hoighty toighty tippy typers "keyboards" >my face when americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings "peanut butter and jelly" >my face when americans call an upsy stairsy the "escalator" >my face when americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a "sweater" >my face when americans call a rickedy-pop a "gear shift" >my face when americans call a choco chip bucky wicky as a "cookie" >my face when americans call a pip pip gollywock a "screwdriver" >my face when americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a "gun" >my face when americans call ceiling-bright a "Lightbulb" >my face when americans call blimpy bounce bounce a "ball" >my face when americans call a slippery dippery long mover a "snake" >my face when americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops "roads"
April 2021

British People

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