"Who’s joe?" a distant voice asks.
Instantly everyone nearby hears the sound of 1,000s of bricks rapidly shuffling towards his location.
The earth itself seemed to cry out in agony, until finally the ground itself split open and a horrific creature crawled from the ground, covered in mucus and tar.
”Joe Momma…” the creature whispered.
The man cried out in pain as he disintegrated into dust, and the whole world fell silent in fear.
"I did a little trolling." the wretched creature remarked before burrowing back into the earth.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas
How do I get my husband to stop going ‘Goblin Mode’ during sex?
How do I get my husband to stop going ‘Goblin Mode’ during sex?
TLDR; My husband says ‘Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says ‘Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward.
I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in ‘Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, ‘Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said ‘Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice?
Edit: The problem isn’t the ‘Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
Confessions
Classic
I cannot get over how much Kripp complains
twitchquotes:
I cannot get over how much this guy complains as soon as he doesn't get extremely lucky. He is so incredibly narcissistic that he truly believes nobody else is allowed to do well or draft effective cards. We are all just guests who play in Kripp's world of hearthstone. To suggest that you are better than Kripp must simply mean that you have better RNG. What an arrogant failure of a man
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Hearthstone
YOU DON'T GET TO TENTACLE ME OCTO-CHAN!
⎠╱⧸⎠ 
YOU DON'T GET TO TENTACLE ME OCTO-CHAN! ⧹╲⎝⧹ This is why eSports will never...
twitchquotes:
This is why eSports will never hit the general public as hard as for instance soccer. the way you kids are spamming this chat is just ruining the whole experience for a grown man. Seriously. Grow up.
twitch chat
Classic
Only way I can feel safe
twitchquotes:
When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
twitch chat
Kripp