[Copypasta] You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

why are you gay

"why are you gay" i dont know.. one day i woke up and saw a mans ass, then i bit my lip and then he turned around and bit his lip too. then we fucked all night and forgot to say no homo, but he was fine with it. since then we've been fucking everyday, he's really vocal in bed and i love having fun with him 😏😏😏 so thats why im gay. im pretty sure his name is [ur dads name here] he's really good in bed.
May 2022

Doinb is a Saudi professional League of Legends player

Muhammed "Doinb" Al-Qahtani is a Saudi professional League of Legends player who currently plays for Saudi pro team Allah warriors based in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. He's currently also working as an oil technician at Saudi Aramco and is looking for a Petroleum engineering job at an Oil company
September 2021

League of Legends

Frustrated anime girl

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⢿⣢⣞⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣯⣟⣿⢿⡇⢃⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡄ ⠄⢿⣿⣯⣏⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣾⢿⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣷ ⠄⣈⣽⢾⣿⣿⣿⣟⣄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⣯⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⣫⢸⣿⢿⣿⣾⣿⢿⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⢸⣟⢸⣿⠸⣷⣝⢻⠘⣿⣿⢸⢿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⡆⢿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿ ⡇⣿⡿⣿⣿⢟⠛⠛⠿⡢⢻⣿⣾⣞⣿⡏⠖⢸⣿⢣⣷⡸⣇⣿⣿⣿⢼⡿⣿⣿ ⣡⢿⡷⣿⣿⣾⣿⣷⣶⣮⣄⣿⣏⣸⣻⣃⠭⠄⠛⠙⠛⠳⠋⣿⣿⣇⠙⣿⢸⣿ ⠫⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣹⢷⣿⡼⠋ ⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢻⢹⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⢸⣿⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡃⣽⣿⣿⡟⠁⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⢿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⡄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⣿⣿⣾⣿⡟⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡇⠸⣆⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⡿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣇⣿⣿⢿⣿⠄⠄
June 2019

Weebs

Kripp will forever be my 'Salt Shaker'

twitchquotes: My favorite streamer is the Kripparrian. I often find my self watching his old vods just to stare and look at his 'salty boy' body. Any BM plays he performed really showcased his pristine hearthstone skill. Sometimes i pause the stream and masterbait numerous times. The reveal of his diablo t-shirt never ceases to excite me. Kripp will forever be my 'Salt Shaker'
twitch chat
December 2017
Kripp

salty

You either die a DONG, or live long enough to become the DONGER

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽You either die a DONG, or live long enough to become the DONGER༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽
twitch chat
August 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing