[Copypasta] You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Please stop posting these unnecessarily long posts

twitchquotes: Can you all just stop posting these unnecessarily long posts please? The only reason you post them is to try and bait someone into copy and pasting them. What if we all just gave interesting views and opinions about the stream instead of posting useless stuff? Please I beg you twitch chat, to stop with this nonsense.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old"

twitchquotes: Why would Kim Jong-un insult me by calling me "old," when I would NEVER call him "short and fat?" Oh well, I try so hard to be his friend - and maybe someday that will happen!
twitch chat
November 2017

Hey Nairo this is your cat

twitchquotes: Hello @NairoMK , this is your cat, Mr. Fluffers, I heard that you were complaining about my excessive meowing. I don't complain about having to hear you talk to yourself for 8 hours while playing that stupid game so I expect the same. Come here and feed me scrub CoolCat
twitch chat
September 2018
NairoMK

2 crewmates with long legs

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠴⠒⠛⠉⠙⠳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣾⣿⣷⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⡤⠟⠚⠛⠛⠓⡆⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠳⣄⠸⣇⡀⠀⣀⣀⣰⡇⠀⢸⠓⢲⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣼⠆⡟⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⠀⢸⡇⢰⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⢸⠇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⣸⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⢻⠀⢀⣀⣀⣴⠀⠀⠀⢹⠅⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡏⠀⠀⢸⡇⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⡇⠀⠀⢸⡇⣿⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⣿⠀⠀⢸⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢿⠀⠀⣸⠁⢸⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀⠀⢸⡄⠀⣯⠀⣸⠀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢯⠀⠘⡇⢹⡆⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⢠⡇⢸⡇⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⣼⠀⠀⡇⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣯⣭⠤⠿⣠⣖⣃⣀⣹⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠹⠿⢿⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀
November 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city?

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city? I thought not. It's not a story the Playmobils would tell you. It's a LEGO legend. Man Lego was a Dark Lord of building, so powerful and so wise he could use the bricks to influence the constructions to create rescue helicopters… He had such a knowledge of building that he could even keep the ones he cared about from falling. The dark side of the LEGOs is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice threw him into the river in LEGO city. Ironic. He could rescue others from the river, but not himself.
December 2020

Lego City

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

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