[Copypasta] You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Hey Nairo this is your cat

twitchquotes: Hello @NairoMK , this is your cat, Mr. Fluffers, I heard that you were complaining about my excessive meowing. I don't complain about having to hear you talk to yourself for 8 hours while playing that stupid game so I expect the same. Come here and feed me scrub CoolCat
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forsenSS

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⡿⢋⣠⣿⣿⡄⣰⢞⣿⡵⣽⢯⣶⢾⣿⣟⣿⣭⣤⡌⠙⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣴⠄⢠⣿⣿⣟⡿⣟⣳⣿⡿⣗⡷⣫⣿⡏⣿⣻⣭⣿⣿⠁⠜⠻ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢰⣿⡀⣾⣿⣿⢼⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣶⣿⡏⣇⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣀⣴⡆ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢹⣿⣿⣿⠾⠟⣛⢷⡝⢟⣳⢿⣽⢿⡟⡝⢻⣿⡿⠿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢨⣀⢿⢧⠟⣏⡛⠻⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⢾⣷⢨⣪⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⠷⠄⢻⣿⠾⢿⢫⣾⣬⢿⣸⣿⡟⡒⢹⣱⣿⣛⠯⣿⢿⢟⣵⣾⢟⠿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢢⡌⣵⣿⡷⢿⣿⣿⣯⢣⣿⡯⣿⣷⣜⡲⣏⣿⣟⣷⢻⣿⢽⠿⣟⣻ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⢆⣼⣿⣿⣴⠂⠈⣿⣿⣯⣵⣾⡿⢿⢋⣉⣥⣿⣽⡿⣾⣿⣿⣿⢿⠋ ⣿⣿⡿⢣⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠾⣒⣨⣿⣺⣿⣟⣾⣥⣀⠐ ⣿⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠄⠉⢻⡣⢾⣾⣯⣟⣫⣽⡿⠟⠁⢉ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣷⣷⣦⣼⡿⣰⡾⣤⣭⣍⠁⠤⣴⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⠄⠓⠄⣉⣠⣤⣤⣀⣸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡄⠚⠳⠂⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠄⢐⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⣀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
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Ben Shapiro destroys another leftist

"Mr. Shapiro, what are your thoughts on women's rights to have an abortion?" Ben: "WELL, that's a very interesting QUESTION, SIR. Before I get started, did you know that my WIFE is a DOCTOR?" Reporter: "...Mr. Shapiro, that's- not-" Ben: "I didn't think so, LEFTIST. Now back to your question- 'should women be allowed to MURDER and SHOOT innocent BABIES and CHILDREN?" Reporter: "Sir, that's not what my orig-" Ben: "OBVIOUSLY not. Now according to PragerU UNIVERSITY, there once was a FARMER who had a DOG, and Bingo was his name-o. Do you know how to spell it?" Reporter: (silence) Ben: "B-I-N-G-O. And Bingo was his name-o." (Stares reporter in the eye; has not blinked since the asked question) "B, I, N G O, B, I, N G O, B, I, N G O, And Bingo was his name-o." Reporter: (Visibly taken aback) "Mr. Shapiro, this is ridiculo-" (The conservative crowd begins laughing and shouting and singing with Ben) All: "And Bingo was his name-o!" (Ben shouting as the curtains close,) "Another CUCK LEFTIST DESTROYED! BAZINGA!"
October 2021

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Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle

twitchquotes: Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle. Long ago, the four mispronounced unit names lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Twitch Chat Nation attacked. Only the DogDog, master of all pepega names , could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished.
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August 2019
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Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing