[Copypasta] I think I'm addicted to settings

God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Horny during Space Jam 2

OK so I was watching space jam 2 and I got RANDOMLY horny. I didn’t wanna exit the movie so I just waited till the Lola scene came up. It came. I started JACKING the SHIT out my pecker. And then.. I ACCIDENTLY NUTTED TO LEBRON😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
July 2021

Barry Bee Benson v2 (Bee Movie)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠠⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠉⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⣀⣤⣦⣷⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣷⣿⣿⠟⣫⠕⠒⢚⠹⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣿⠟⠓⠂⠀⠀⠠⢨⣤⠉⠂⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⡤⢶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡏⡄⢢⣖⠠⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⡾⠗⢻⡷⠈⠻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢏⠀⠈⠋⠀⠀⠄⢀⠀⠉⠀⠀⢱⠀⠀⠐⠖⣖⠒⠋⠉⠁⣀⣀⣤⣾⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⢸⣧⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠐⠒⠒⠈⠀⠀⢀⣠⢆⡞⠀⠀⠀⣼⣏⠃⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⡀⠀⠀⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⢤⣶⡶⣿⣿⣿⢟⡥⡊⠀⠀⠀⣼⣟⠂⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣆⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠧⠀⠙⠻⣿⣈⠀⠀⢀⣾⢟⠎⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⢀⣿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠁⠜⠻⣾⣴⣿⣯⡂⠀⢀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⣿⣿⢡⣻⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⠈⠀⠘⠈⠛⠷⣷⣿⣷⣶⣌⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⣼⣿⣿⠃⢸⠃⠻⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡌⡤⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢻⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣶⣿⣿⣯⣀⣟⣠⣴⣷⣾⣿⡿⠛⠛⠻⣟⣷⠒⠄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⣰⣿⣿⡿⠃⣸⠟⠉⠁⠀⠀⠟⠛⠛⠚⠫⠀⠠⠙⠠⠇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠤⠾⠿⠿⠋⠐⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2021

Clap

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⣄⡀⠀⠀⡠⠞⠛⢦⣠⢤⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⢠⠏⠀⠀⢱⡀⣸⠁⠀⡴⠋⠀⠀⣹⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠋⠉⢿⢀⡤⠶⣴⠇⣯⠀⣼⠁⠀⢀⡴⠷⣄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠁⠀⣀⡾⠋⠀⠀⢹⣼⠁⢠⡇⠀⡴⠋⠀⠀⡼ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠊⠑⢦⠀⡴⠋⢀⣠⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⠧⣄⡾⠁⡼⠁⣀⣤⠾⡁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⣨⠟⠁⢠⡞⠁⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠛⠁⠀⣿⠃⣰⠃⣴⠋⠀⠀⣷ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⢠⠞⠁⠀⢠⠏⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠁⠀⢀⣠⡴⠿⣶⡇⢰⠇⠀⠀⢠⠇ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⢿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⣠⠞⠁⠀⡴⠚⠉⠁⠀⢀⡟⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡾⣼⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠙⢼⠃⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡇⠉⡎⠀⣰⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⡼⠉⠀⠀⠀⠘⠂⠀⠀⣠⠇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡇⢸⠀⣰⠃⠀⡴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠖⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⠁⡏⢠⠃⢀⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⡞⠀⠃⡎⢀⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡏⠀⣀⡤⠴⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡴⢺⠇⠀⠀⠀⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⠒⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢳⡀⠘⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠳⣄⠀⠙⠲⣤⣀⣠⠴⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠓⠦⣄⣀⡠⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat

twitchquotes: Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat, I heard that you were complaining about my excesive meowing. I dont complain about having to hear you talk to yourself for 8 hours while playing that stupid game so I expect the same. Come here and feed me scrub CoolCat
twitch chat
October 2015
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing