[Copypasta] I think I'm addicted to settings

God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Being a hentai actress must be so weird

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: you’re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000¥ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.
February 2021

Weebs

Obey the call of Kel'Thuzad!

twitchquotes: ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ Minions, servants, soldiers of the cold dark, obey the call of Kel’Thuzad!ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

pepeSpit

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⢾⣶⣦⢀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⡀⢿⣿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣰⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡾⠁⣀⠙⠸⣿⡇⡟⣋⣩⣴⣶⣶⣶⣍⢿⣷⣄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠈⠙⠻⢷⡄⠄⠄⢠⣝⡀⠤⣴⣧⣭⠄⡞⠛⠻⣭⣭⣭⡛⢿⢸⣿⣿⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣶⣶⣶⢸⠄⠒⠄⢸⣿⣿⣷⡌⡼⣿⣿⣧⠄ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⢠⣴⡾⢟⡻⢿⣿⣷⢄⣐⠶⠿⠿⠛⣛⣃⣴⣿⣿⡿⠄ ⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⢉⣉⡉⢭⣥⣿⣧⡘⣿⣮⣻⣿⣶⣮⣭⣍⣋⣭⣭⣴⣿⣿⣟⣱⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⠟⠄⠘⣿⡿⢛⣣⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⠻⠋⠄⠄⠄⠘⢇⣛⣛⣛⣩⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢏⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣶⣝⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⣝⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣩⣤⣄
November 2021

Pepe

Potato harvest is bad. Play Hearthstone in Amerikanski

twitchquotes: My name Dimitri Baryshnikov. I grow up in small farm to have make potatos. Father say "Dimitri, potato harvest is bad. Need you to have play porfessional game in Amerikanski for make money for head-scarf for babushka." I bring honor to komrade and babushka. Sorry for is not have English. Plz no cykapasta
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Streamers should eat before they start streaming

twitchquotes: Streamers should eat before they start streaming. Eating while streaming, unless you put other content on and take the camera off you, is extremely bad manners and disgusting. "Streaming is a real job!" It is. But most streamers dont treat it like a real job. Between failing to make schedules, acting in a way that would be considered unprofessional, constantly calling off, etc etc. Content creation can be a real job. But most dont treat it as one.
twitch chat
April 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing