[Copypasta] The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.
August 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Summoning Kripp

twitchquotes: ใƒฝเผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰ OJ poured and candle lit, with this chant i summon Kripp ใƒฝเผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

K3soju dating FIRST or EIF

twitchquotes: K3soju met that cute girl. They talked a lot, she seemed perfect. Caring, funny and also unbelievably pretty. He felt that she is the one for him. Once, during their long night conversation, he asked her how many boyfriends she had before him. She said - only one. Michael got furious. "There's no way. I'm not playing for second! I'm FIRST or EIF" Then he muted her and never met her again.
twitch chat
January 2022
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Maya's mod responds to Miz and Maya break up

I wish I could say I didn't see this coming but...sigh..I definitely did. To many people not in the loop it may have come as a shock. They certainly LOOKED like a happy couple, but when you've been a twitch mod for as long as I have...you notice certain things. As Maya's head mod and commandant in charge of holding off weirdos I could tell very clearly that something was up. The way she acted on stream, her general atmosphere, twas as if a beautiful chrysanthemum was being oppressed by a violent and balding Gardner. Someone who had not the faintest idea how to look after beautiful flowers. But the time has come, the thorns and nature hath come to wreak havok. At the moment a plan is being drafted by me and the sub mods to find her a new boyfriend who is fit to properly look after her. Naturally I will be taking the temporary (and maybe permanent if all goes to plan ๐Ÿ˜‰) role of boyfriend/guardian. But while I reveal my plans and provide you all a mere glimpse at the machinations set in motion by this breakup I must warn you... BACK OFF... This is not your fight, you have no idea who you are dealing with. If you come after her now without going through the necessary protocols then I won't be able to control myself. There is a reason I would never show myself on stream or play among us. There is a side to the top twitch dog that you don't wanna know about. These fangs are here for a reason, don't. Make me. Use them.
September 2021
Maya

Simps

Easter emoji pasta

HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES!!! Today is ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰Easter!! You know what that means๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”??? Itโ€™s time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ then itโ€™s time for โ›ช๏ธchurchโ›ช๏ธ!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ because jesus is CUMMING๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‰. Then itโ€™s time for the egg hunt ๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜ฉ CRACK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ and CREVICE ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜ for the GRAND PRIZE ๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿ˜‡ getting that ๐Ÿต๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒบPASTEL PUSSY๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฃ๐ŸŒฎ RODE ๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡ into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ. If u get 5๏ธโƒฃ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ back ur a LOADED ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ EASTER BASKET. If you get 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆIN UR RABBIT ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿ‡๐ŸฐHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
April 2022

Holiday Emoji

Easter

Holiday

Transcript of me cleaning my keyboard and reassembling it

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June 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing