[Copypasta] The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.
August 2021
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I sexually identify as You

Hi, my name is whatever yours is and I sexually identify as you. I use I/me/myself pronouns. If youโ€™re wondering โ€œWonโ€™t that get you confused with me?โ€ you are a transphobic bigot because I clearly stated that I identify as, and therefore am, you. By saying that I can get confused with you, you are implying that I am not you, and denying that Iโ€™m you is transphobic because you are denying my gender identity, and also your own because I am you. If you are now wondering โ€œDoesnโ€™t that make you also a transphobe?โ€ then I will answer. No, it does not. โค๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ
January 2021

I sexually Identify as

Hello Kripp, this is Optimus Prime

twitchquotes: ๏ผจ๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ ๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ผฏ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝ“ ๏ผฐ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ”๏ฝ ๏ฝ™๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ…๏ฝŽ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ฝ“๏ฝ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ…๏ผŽ ๏ผท๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ… ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝ† ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ ๏ผฏ๏ผช ๏ฝ—๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝ… ๏ผด๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝƒ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ผค๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ“๏ผŽ ๏ผฐ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝ„๏ฝ–๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ… ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ™๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝ… ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝƒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ•๏ฝ” ๏ฝ”๏ฝ ๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‰ ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ผฎ๏ฝ๏ฝš๏ฝ‰ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ„๏ฝ“๏ผŽ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

You have posted a bad meme

twitchquotes: Greetings. It appears as though you have posted a "bad meme". Now, it isn't too late to rectify your error! With these simple steps, you can redeem yourself int he eyes of your internet peers. 1) ctrl + w :)
twitch chat
December 2019

Lapras

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–’โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–“ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ
ascii art
April 2017

Pokemon

Obi Wan Shapiro

Okay, so letโ€™s say hypothetically, these werenโ€™t the droids youโ€™re looking for. You see, the droids youโ€™re looking for have the Death Star plans, correct? However, as those droid are close minded liberals, and these droids are free thinking informed conservatives, these would not be the droids youโ€™re looking for. Now, if you were to assume that these droids are the droids youโ€™re looking for because they are a protocol droid and an astromech, then that would actually make you the real racists, as you would assume that all astromech droids have the death star plans. So if this were true, these arenโ€™t the droid youโ€™re looking for.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

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