Holy fucking shit. I want to bang Timmy Nook from Animal Crossing so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to Nook’s Cranny I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of him online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Timmy Nook. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Timmy Nook’s tight tanuki asshole. I want him to have my mutant human/tanuki babies.
Fuck, my fucking mom caught me with a raccoon I found in the trash. I'd dressed him in my dad’s Hawaiian shirt and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my Nintendo Switch. I might not ever get to see Timmy Nook again.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
sneaky and meteos are out walking in the park
twitchquotes:
Its a cold autum eve and sneaky and meteos are out walking in the park as the multicolored leaves dwindles down on top of their heads, meteos slowly slips his hand into sneakys as he gives him a devious smile. they then proceed into the bushes and through the park the words ''METEOOOs'' could be heard eccoing.
twitch chat
Sneaky
League of Legends
Purpose of Twitch chat
twitchquotes:
What is the purpose of twitch if not to let those with introversion let out their wierdest inner thoughts in writing through random emotes to an awkward king like forsen. Please no cheese in my pizza. Fettuccini Alfredo
twitch chat
Forsen
Hello Kripp, it's me Timothy
twitchquotes:
ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ɪᴛ's ᴍᴇ, ᴛɪᴍᴏᴛʜʏ. ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴍᴇ? ʏᴏᴜ ᴜsᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴜʟʟʏ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴀʟʟ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʙ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪ ᴡᴀs ᴀ ᴋɪᴅ, ʙᴜᴛ ɪ ɢʀᴇᴡ ᴜᴘ ᴀɴᴅ ɢᴏᴛ ᴛᴏᴜɢʜ ᕦ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ᕤ . ɪ ᴀᴍ ɴᴏᴡ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴇғᴇɴᴅ ᴍʏ ʜᴏɴᴏʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴋɪᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀ** (ง'̀-'́)ง
twitch chat
Kripp
Whale and bee wrestling
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⡴⠊⠉⠁⠄⡱⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡔⢩⢽⡝⠒⠒⡩⢍⣍⠉⠁⠄⢄⣸⠃⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠟⠚⠋⠄⠄⠄⠣⠻⠟⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⣄⠄⠄
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⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⠢⡀⠄⠄⢧⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠄
⠄⠉⠑⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢆⠄⠄⠻⡛⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⢖⣲⠒⢦⣀⠄⠄⠄⢸⡇
⠄⠄⠄⣀⣱⣄⣠⠴⠚⢭⡙⠉⠙⠲⣼⡷⠤⠤⣤⡀⠄⠁⠄⠄⠈⠙⣇⠄⠸⡇
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⠄⠘⠢⢄⣀⣀⣠⣤⠶⠚⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠦⣾⣿⡿⠁⠄⡿⠉⠄⠄⣠⠾⢋⡼⠃
⠄⠔⠂⠈⠙⢲⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⡏⠄⠄⠄⡡⠤⠶⡋⠁⠄⢸⡇⠄
⠎⠄⡠⠴⠒⠼⣿⣽⣯⣶⣤⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣶⡇⠄⠄⢠⠁⠄⠄⣧⡀⠄⠸⡇⠄
⣀⠎⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⡇⠄⠄⡎⠄⠄⡰⠠⡙⢦⣀⢧⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⢸⠁⠄⠊⠄⣀⠇⠄⠉⠛
Teamfight Tactics
I hate, hate, hate coffee culture
I hate, hate, hate coffee culture. I can't stand people saying, "Oh, I can't do anything until I get a warm cup of coffee in me." Shut up. Being a former smoker, I recognize the addiction and subsequent irritability of coffee drinkers and it bugs me to no end that caffeine gets glossed over as an addictive substance, or even fucking celebrated to some extent. Those people who brag about needing 5 expresso shots (sorry, esssspresso) a day need an intervention, not a nod of approval. Seriously, all you coffee drinkers are the biggest group of fucking enablers I've ever seen.
When doing group activities, like camping, I loathe waiting for others to start their day after a morning ritual that hogs counter space, or propane, or dirties good clean water. I hate the sleepy look in peoples' eyes as they grasp their cup of stimulant that they wouldn't need had they never started drinking it in the first place.
There's an entire fucking cupboard in my kitchen dedicated to stupid coffee mugs and their dumb sayings staring back at me despite living in a household where only one person drinks coffee. Why? And the dishes. Since nearly every person drinks coffee, inevitably us non-coffee drinkers are going to have to clean up after your morning fix. Seriously, I've done so many goddamned cleanings of coffee mugs if I had a dime for every one, I'd probably have enough for a Starbucks franchise.
And don't even get me started on Starbucks. Godamned devil business slanging legal crack for decades, hogging good real estate so addicts have a place to slurp up and get their morning shit in before work.
Lastly, I despise the amalgam of ways people cook up their black powder and then talk up the flavor as though it tastes like something other than a dirty sock. That's your addiction speaking. You want to know why you need to dump half an udder of cream in your cup? It's because cream is fucking delicious and when combined with your filthy water, makes it somewhat bearable.
And your stupid machines that creak and groan through the quietude of my morning can go fuck themselves. Talk about a waste of counter-space. And the spent black stimulant granules that spill over onto the counter, staining the grout drives me nuts.
And lastly, the goddamned keurig cups or whatever they're called are one of humanity's worst inventions, sandwiched between Glyphosate and Joe Rogan. At least the meth addicts don't deposit a plastic remnant that will persist in landfills for hundreds of years spreading micro-plastics into our environment every time they need to get high.