Holy fucking shit. I want to bang Timmy Nook from Animal Crossing so goddamn bad. I can't stand it anymore. Every time I go to Nook’s Cranny I get a massive erection. I've seen literally every rule 34 post there is of him online. My dreams are nothing but constant fucking sex with Timmy Nook. I'm sick of waking up every morning with six nuts in my boxers and knowing that those are nuts that should've been busted inside of Timmy Nook’s tight tanuki asshole. I want him to have my mutant human/tanuki babies.
Fuck, my fucking mom caught me with a raccoon I found in the trash. I'd dressed him in my dad’s Hawaiian shirt and went to fucking town. She hasn't said a word to me in 10 hours and I'm worried she's gonna take away my Nintendo Switch. I might not ever get to see Timmy Nook again.
What happened to this ad? :(
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K3soju dating FIRST or EIF
twitchquotes:
K3soju met that cute girl. They talked a lot, she seemed perfect. Caring, funny and also unbelievably pretty. He felt that she is the one for him. Once, during their long night conversation, he asked her how many boyfriends she had before him. She said - only one. Michael got furious. "There's no way. I'm not playing for second! I'm FIRST or EIF" Then he muted her and never met her again.
twitch chat
k3soju
Kripp invites Hotform to a friendly Fireside duel
twitchquotes:
Hotform sees another invite to a friendly Fireside duel from Kripp and wants to move into fetal curl, but his hand is chained to the heater. Rania steps next to his laptop, putting dry bread and tap water down. “Come, Hotform, it is only 3 more hours today. You can even have some lettuce for dinner.” His eyes tear up while he accepts the invite and mulligans his hand, but then he sees Kripp’s first minion: Lucentbark. “No, nononono, please, please! Kill me! Just kill me! CHAT! CHAT HELP ME!”
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Kripp
Hearthstone
AITA for not telling my wife about all the hitchhikers I killed in the 70s?
Back when I (68M) was a young and dumb twenty-something, I spent a few carefree years in Southern California raping, torturing, and murdering hitchhikers. I don't want any judgement from SJWs about this, please, if you didn't live in Cali in the 1970s, you wouldn't understand. It was just what we did back in those days. Eventually I grew up, got married, had three beautiful kids, and was content to just get off to my trophies and polaroids, and maybe kill the occasional drifter on special occasions.
The other day, my wife (37F) found the hidden panel in my basement wall where I keep all the old memories, and she went ballistic. I tried to calm her down, explained that, firstly, they were all dudes, so she shouldn't exactly be getting jealous. Second, they're all dead, so it's not like she's going to have to worry about me leaving her for any of them. Third, there were like three or four other guys doing the same thing around then, and they took the credit for most of my kills. I was very careful, covered my tracks, rarely finished inside them. I don't know why she's got her knickers in such a twist.
Quite frankly, I'm feeling really hurt about the whole thing. We've been together for nearly thirty years, and she's thinking about leaving me over something like this? Maybe I should have been more honest, but I was raised to see this as men's business, not something you involve your old lady in.
Am I the asshole?
AITA
Day 1 on Kripp's stream the spam is strong
twitchquotes:
༼ ºل͟º ༽Day1 on kripps stream the spam is strong, ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉDay2 on kripps stream this feeling is wrong, ୧༼ ͡◉ل͜ ͡◉༽୨Day3 on kripps stream i've learnt to accept, (§ ͠° ل͜ °)§Day4 on kripps stream my virginity may you accept.
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Kripp
3Head You have entered BREXIT
twitchquotes:
———————————————————————— 🇬🇧 3Head You have entered BREXIT. Type 3Head to become a citizen. ————————————————————————
twitch chat