[Copypasta] Lying about service dogs

I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask; ‘Is it a service dog?’ With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to. If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink Always works. I love dogs
July 2021
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Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky?

twitchquotes: (⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky? ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Call on me! (⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Yes little Dong? ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Kripp is never lucky, sir! (⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Wrong, Kripp is lucky a reasonable amount of time. Come see me after class for your punishment . ʕ⌐ ͡▢ ͜ᴥ ͡▢ʔ
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

forsenPirate

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠑⠢⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⣤⣾⢿⣿⣧⢠⣤⡀⠄⠄⠉⠒⠠⢄⣀⣀⣀⣻⣿⣿ ⠑⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣳⣿⣷⣿⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠈⠒⠤⠄⢀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠟⠁⠷⠾⠝⠶⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣵⡶⠶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⠄⠾⠿⣶⡄⣤⣤⣤⣤⠄⠄⢀⣀⠄⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣯⣴⢦⣼⢳⡄⣿⣿⢫⣿⣀⠘⡛⢿⡛⢷⣤⣜⡻⣿⣿⣿⠋⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣜⣫⣿⢶⣟⡽⣿⠡⣶⣗⡲⠖⣯⠼⣿⡿⢗⣨⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠿⣏⣾⡿⠗⠿⠷⠉⢻⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡟⣤⠟⢻⢥⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣚⠕⠄⠤⣬⣿⣤⣤⠄⠄⠌⠳⣽⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠞⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡦⢄⣉⢀⣠⣴⣶⣾⣶⣿⡗⢹⣿⣏⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢐⣮⣍⠙⢿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣠⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢸⣟⠸⠿⠋⣴⣶⣄ ⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣿⡟⠃⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠛⠃⠐⠉⠁⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⡤⠚⣠⣾⣿⠟⠄⣤⢠⣤⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣀⣴⣿⠿⠉⠄⠄⡟⠘⣿⠄⠻⠾⠷⠶⣶⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

My Mom took away my computer!

twitchquotes: My Mom took away my computer! No More Fortnite >:(! I showed her I posted her credit card on my Instagram! HECK YOU MOM
twitch chat
April 2019

Fortnite

So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix.

So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behaviour. For example, if you eat it is likely that you swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that because that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why am I writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging shit again and I am not sure how to respond to that.
December 2021

I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

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