I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
‘Is it a service dog?’
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
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Seafood dinner over skype on a dial up internet connection
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strifecro
SUMMONING SPELL FOR HYDRA
twitchquotes:
THIS IS THE SUMMONING SPELL HandsUp FOR THE HYDRA DEEK OF HELL HandsUp ONE WEEB MUST BE SACRIFICED HandsUp FOR THE HYDRA DEEK TO RISE HandsUp OH MIGHTY HYDRA I SING YOUR SONG HandsUp MAY YOU GROW BIG AND LONG HandsUp
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KappaPride
Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, this is Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C .... I came to warn you about the extinction of Herbivores and the 'never lucky' curse it bestows on us. Kripp, you must eat meat immediately! If you don't, a giant "MEAT-EOR" will crash into earth and extinct us all... again... Us Herbivores were wrong. WE WERE WRONG! 
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Yo boys u ready for the perfect pyramid LUL ?
twitchquotes:
Yo boys u ready for the perfect pyramid 
? I’m a god xDxDxD xD look at the most perfect pyramid. Try like me! Can’t without dank meme And now look it will be o very tall Can you do a 5 line pyramid? What about 6 lines XD Try it! Copy it! Here it’s 8 it is 9!
? I’m a god xDxDxD xD look at the most perfect pyramid. Try like me! Can’t without dank meme And now look it will be o very tall Can you do a 5 line pyramid? What about 6 lines XD Try it! Copy it! Here it’s 8 it is 9!
twitch chat
im not homophobic, just extremely racist
Hi i got suspended from reddit for the "what are you fucking gay" comment and just wanted to say that it was a joke and i thought that it could obviously be seen as one but i guess it wasnt. So yeah im not homophobic, just extremely racist, sorry if i made you feel bad, all my homies are allies of the lgbtq community. idek if you reported it maybe you got the joke but better safe than sorry and all that