[Copypasta] Lying about service dogs

I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask; ‘Is it a service dog?’ With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to. If at first they say ‘no’ I reply with ‘are you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?’with another big wink Always works. I love dogs
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Ban one elephant

twitchquotes: 🐘 BAN 🐘 ONE 🐘 ELEPHANT 🐘 AND 🐘 YOU 🐘 GET 🐘 THE 🐘 WHOLE 🐘 PARADE 🐘
twitch chat
November 2019

Ban X Get The Whole Y

Why do I keep hearing “pre madana” all the time?

Why do I keep hearing “pre madana” all the time? Did she use to do some other thing before she was famous or am I just dumb? Edit: I was just stupid Edit 2: which one of you reported me to Reddit resources or whatever??
July 2021

Kripp the adult film actor

twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

I get a thousand hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs

twitchquotes: 🤔 In the song "Fireflies" by Owl City he states "I get a thousand hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs." Are we to assume each bug hugs him a thousand times? Or is he only getting hugged by 1/10th of the bugs? Or is each bug is giving him 1/10th of a hug? 🤔
twitch chat
June 2017

Polish cow 2

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠔⠂⠀⠀⠀⢤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣾⠉⠉⠙⣶⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠰⣿⣷⣾⣿⣷⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣂⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣹⣟⣿⣦⠈⠻⠋⢉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡈⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠿⠿⠁⣿⣿⣿⠎⠻⣯⠉⠉⠉⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⢹⣿⢻⠉⠉⠁⠈⠻⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⡟⠀⠀⠈⠳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⠤⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⡟⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠤⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠂
December 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing