[Copypasta] How do I properly get rid of a life size sex doll?

I bought a $1000+ sex doll which weighs almost 100 pounds and has a metal skeleton and silicone outside. It's like 5'3 and looks very realistic. I bought it when I was drunk like 2 years ago and didn't cancel the order the next day as I forgot I even ordered it; it showed up on my doorstep like 10 days later in a huge box... I tried to use it once but it is impossible to use because its so cold lol. I have it buried under clothes that I don't wear anymore in my walk-in closet for almost 2 years and every time I have a girl over I have to keep the closet locked and I even have to tell my cleaner to clean all rooms aside from my walk-in closet as I am embarrassed by it. I NEVER litter but I don't know what to do with it. I really want to put it in the back of my truck and dump it in the woods somewhere but I know that is a shit thing to do and will not do it. How can I dispose of it in a environmentally safe way without driving to a dump and looking like I am disposing of a dead body or having the workers laugh at me? I can't cut it up into pieces and put it into trash bags as the skeleton is metal and I just don't have the tools to do it; its a really legit sex doll it is super high quality. My apartment complex has a huge dumpster but its all on camera; should I just go there super late at night and throw it in there? The dumpster is on camera and its for "trash only" it says no metal and no boxes. Anyone have an answer on how to dispose of this thing by myself, quietly and without anyone seeing me? Thanks !! EDIT: Lots of weirdos getting angry at me because I "fabricated this" story/question. She just got a (SFW) photo shoot for you so shut up. https://ibb.co/album/xKkCs1
July 2021
https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/oeltx0/how_do_i_properly_get_rid_of_a_life_size_sex_doll
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I love seeing TRUMP lose

twitchquotes: I love seeing TRUMP lose, it's my daily medicine, my weekly energy, my monthly inspiration and my yearly motivation. His loss is the only reason i'm still alive, i was born to love and enjoy the failure that he has achieved.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Rooster

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β—β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„ β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€ β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▄░░▀▄▄▄░▄ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄░▄▄▀▀ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–„β–Œβ–Œ
ascii art
February 2017

Why are you rank 9?

twitchquotes: β”Œ| β—” β–ƒ β—” |┐ UH KRIPP..... why are you rank 9? β”Œ| β—” β–ƒ β—” |┐
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Kripp you shaggy looking plant eating bum

twitchquotes: Kripp you shaggy looking plant eating bum i bet you can't even afford a real fedora like mine or treat a fine gal to a meal you smelly hobo *walks away turns around tips fedora and continues walking*
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Bear hands up

β‘°β ΄β ’β ˆβ‘€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β’€β’™β£β‘°β’Ί β Ίβ’€β‘ƒβ ‹β ‚β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β’€β’€β „β  β €β „β €β €β „β „β „β „β „β Έβ Έβ£Ώβ Ÿβ’Έ β‘€β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘§β‘„β „β „β „β „β’€β‘€β °β ‹β’€β „β „β‘€β €β£Άβ‘Ύβ Ÿβ „β „β „β „β’Έβ „β „β „β‘‡ β ‘β ‰β ‰β β …β’°β‘¦β ‰β‘™β‘½β „β „β œβ ›β ΄β Šβ „β‘€β’Όβ£§β‘€β …β „β „β „β‘Œβ „β „β „β’΄ β’°β „β „β „β ˜β‘Œβ’·β‘„β’β β ˆβ „β „β’€β‘ƒβ£ β£Ύβ£†β£Όβ£Ώβ£§β‘—β „β „β’°β‘…β „β „β ˜β’Ώ β Έβ‘€β „β „β „β ˜β’„β ™β‘Žβ‘‡β‘¦β „β „β ˆβ Ήβ’»β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘β‘‡β „β’€β£‡β ‚β „β „β£Œβ’Έ β „β‘Ÿβ „β „β „β °β Όβ’’β‘³β£„β’€β‘€β ‚β „β „β £β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β „β‘Ώβ’±β’ β žβ †β „β „β „β °β£Ύ β „β‘ƒβ „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ “β£Ÿβ’°β β β „β „β „β ‰β ‘β „β „β’β Šβ β ‰β β „β „β β Άβ£ͺ β  β’Ύβ‘ˆβ£„β‘€β „β „β „β ˜β ˜β ‘β’‘β‘„β „β „β „β ˆβ „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β‘¬β’—β‘Ž β „β ¬β’§β£„β –β£€β „β „β „β „β „β ¨β ™β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ °β‘β „ β „β „β „β’ˆβ£³β£­β‘ƒβ †β ‡β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β–„β–„β „β „β „β „β „β „β£Όβ β „ β‘€β’β£›β Ώβ Ώβ ›β’»β£Ώβ’Άβ£°β’€β‘’β „β „β „β „β „β „β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–„β „β „β β‘ β£Ÿβ †β „β „ β „β „β „β „β „β „β£»β£§β£‡β Šβ’™β’£β‘„β „β „β „β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β „β „β’€β£™β ›β ¨β‘„ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⒀⣠⣾⣿⑿⠿Ⓙ⣲⠄⣁⑀⠄⠄▀▄░░▀▄⠄⠄⠐⠑⠾⒨⠆ β €β –β ’β šβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ££β Άβ ¦β ·β β£”β‘―β „β „β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ „β β –β ‹β „β’ͺβ „
ascii art
March 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing