[Copypasta] Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

I met him in real life and told him how much of a fan I was. He kept on saying rude things to me such as "Who are you", "How did you get in my house" and "I'm calling the police." Celebrities, PLEASE respect your fans!
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020

Hurr Durr Durr Pizza

twitchquotes: α••OpieOPα•— οΌ¨ο½…ο½Œο½Œο½ οΌ«ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½οΌŒ οΌ£ο½™ο½‚ο½’ο½‰ο½˜ ο½ˆο½…ο½’ο½…οΌŽ οΌͺust ο½—ο½ο½Žο½”ο½…ο½„ to ο½“ο½ο½™οΌš β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ οΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ . β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ οΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ . β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ οΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ . β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ οΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ . β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺοΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ . β™©β™¬ο½žβ™ͺ οΌ¨οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ€οΌ΅οΌ²οΌ² οΌ°οΌ©οΌΊοΌΊοΌ‘ α••OpieOPα•—
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

Top Lel

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–β–Œβ–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–€β– β–β–€β–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ– β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β– β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–€β–€ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–€β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–’β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ▐▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
November 2014

Kiwi's Father, Pineapple

twitchquotes: Imaqtpie, this is Kiwis father, Pineapple, I must ask you to wake Kiwi up ASAP, otherwise he will be late for kindergarten! Do it preferably with a loud scream. Pls no fruiterino pasterino
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

Kripp saved my life; Rania saved my sanity

twitchquotes: I discovered Kripp after a terrible car accident. I was n a coma for weeks. One day, the nurse decided to play Twitch in the room, specifically to Kripp's channel. I immediately awoke. I went to mute the channel, but it was then that Rania brought Kripp his food, saving me the effort. Kripp saved my life. Rania saved my sanity.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
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