[Copypasta] Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

I met him in real life and told him how much of a fan I was. He kept on saying rude things to me such as "Who are you", "How did you get in my house" and "I'm calling the police." Celebrities, PLEASE respect your fans!
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Forgive English, I am Russia

forgive english, i am Russia. i come to study clothing and fashion at American university. i am here little time and i am very hard stress. i am gay also and this very difficult for me, i am very religion person. i never act to be gay with other men before. but after i am in america 6 weeks i am my friend together he is gay also. He was show me American fashion and then we are kiss. We sex together. I never before now am tell my mother about gay because i am very shame. As i fock this American boy it is very good to me but also i am feel so guilty. I feel extreme guilty as I begin orgasm. I feel so guilty that I pick up my telephone and call Mother in Russia. I awaken her. It too late for stopping so I am cumming sex. I am very upset and guilty and crying, so I yell her, "I AM CUM FROM SEX" (in Russia). She say what? I say "I AM CUM FROM SEX" and she say you boy, do not marry American girl, and I say "NO I AM CUM FROM SEX WITH MAN, I AM IN ASS, I CUM IN ASS" and my mother very angry me. She not get scared though. I hang up phone and am very embarrass. My friend also he is very embarrass. I am guilt and feel very stupid. I wonder, why do I gay with man? But I continue because when it spurt it feel very good in American ass.
July 2014

KappaPride

Classic

Easter emoji pasta

HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES!!! Today is ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽ‰Easter!! You know what that means๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”??? Itโ€™s time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ then itโ€™s time for โ›ช๏ธchurchโ›ช๏ธ!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ because jesus is CUMMING๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‰. Then itโ€™s time for the egg hunt ๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต๐Ÿ•ต!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜ฉ CRACK ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ and CREVICE ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜ for the GRAND PRIZE ๐Ÿค‘๐Ÿ˜‡ getting that ๐Ÿต๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒบPASTEL PUSSY๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฃ๐ŸŒฎ RODE ๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ‡ into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฐ HOES๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ. If u get 5๏ธโƒฃ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get ๐Ÿ”Ÿ back ur a LOADED ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ EASTER BASKET. If you get 2๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆIN UR RABBIT ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿ‡๐ŸฐHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
April 2022

Holiday Emoji

Easter

Holiday

Do you have what it takes to be a Memester?

slow claps steps out of the shadows Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material... But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme. And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive. See you on the boards...
June 2017

Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

March 2021

Dennis in a time machine

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. โ€œDennis,โ€ Kripp speaks breathlessly into the night. โ€œGet back to the time machine. We have what we need here.โ€ A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked โ€œTop Deck.โ€ Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. โ€œWe will see who says "Salt" now,โ€ he saysโ€ฆ.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing