So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. Iโm a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but Iโm not sure what to say in interviews now if Iโm asked why I left this job. Any advice?
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I'm gay because...
You are gay because you like men
Iโm gay because I hate women
We are not the same
Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 7)
After we threw Liam out the window, I decided to call another emergency meeting. โChad sus!1!1!!1 Heโs the SUSSY VERY IMPOSTER!โ I said. They all asked why Chad was sus. I said it was because his name is Chad. They all agreed so we ejected him. I was naruto running around the office when Adam stopped me and said โWhy are you running?โ OH MY FUCK DID HE JUST SAY THE FUNNY UGANDAN MEME? SPIT ON HIM BROTHERS. I spit on Adam and I pulled down my pants and pissed on him. He ran away screaming and everybody looked at me. I pulled my pants up.โ Adam sus. Heโs screaming.โ Everyone nodded and we ejected Adam. My son came out of the elevator even though it was take your kid to work day and he was supposed to be on the bottom floor, not up here on the 3rd floor! So I said โSon, what the fuck nugget wholesome keanu reeves are you doing here?โ He closed the elevator door and I think he went to the first floor. I tried pissing on the elevator door in hopes that it would malfunction it but I donโt think it worked. That stupid little bastard. So I got in the elevator when it came back up and went to the first floor. I looked around but couldnโt find him. I pulled one of the kids up by her shirt and said โWHERE THE FUCK IS MY CHILD?โ She was screaming and I threw her away. I stomped down the hallways trying to look for him but I couldnโt find him. โThis is not a fortnite minecraft roblox 100 wholesome keanu reeves chungus Amogus moment. Thatโs pretty sus.โ All the coworkers were looking at me in terror.
I went out back and searched in the dumpster to see if I could yet again try to find a weapon to kill all the people there. I already got rid of Chad, Adam and Liam so everyone else could easily be disposed of.
Among Us / Amogus
Trolling with Among Us
I sexually idenfity as VapeNation
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as 
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and Iโm *** retarded but I donโt care, Iโm beautiful. Iโm having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me โLitโ and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you canโt accept me youโre a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and Iโm *** retarded but I donโt care, Iโm beautiful. Iโm having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me โLitโ and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you canโt accept me youโre a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
twitch chat
VapeNation
I sexually Identify as
Omg imagine an xD spam in this font
twitchquotes:
๐ธ๐ถ๐ฐ ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ช๐ฐ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฎ ๐ช๐ท "๐๐" ๐ผ๐น๐ช๐ถ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ผ ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ท๐ฝ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฝ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ต๐ญ ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ช๐ฒ๐ญ๐ผ ๐ช๐ผ ๐ฏ๐พ๐ฌ๐ด ` ๐ต๐ฎ๐ต ๐ด๐ฎ๐ด
๐ธ๐ถ๐ฐ ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ช๐ฐ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฎ ๐ช๐ท "๐๐" ๐ผ๐น๐ช๐ถ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ผ ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ท๐ฝ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฝ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ต๐ญ ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ช๐ฒ๐ญ๐ผ ๐ช๐ผ ๐ฏ๐พ๐ฌ๐ด ` ๐ต๐ฎ๐ต ๐ด๐ฎ๐ด
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Dota Major
