[Copypasta] Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. Iโ€™m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but Iโ€™m not sure what to say in interviews now if Iโ€™m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
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2Chainz lyrics

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Memeing harder than anyone I've ever seen on this website

twitchquotes: wow dude you just memed harder than anyone i've ever seen on this website. How many memes did you acquire before graduating from Memeing University? Do you meme over 9000 times a day, because the fact that you are such an expert memer points in that direction. God damn I have never seen a meme as epic and dank as this in my entire life, and i am quite the meme master myself, creating over 500 popular memes on the mememunity s4s and danking and memeing for the last five years (though you obviously experience time in meme years at this point, which makes me meme my meme to you sir, i mean meme) I really wish i could meme as hard as you because than my meme would meme and then memes would be dank as a meme! rite, amirite? lol and lel and kek but really sir, thank you for being dank as *** and posting such sweet meme as this, it made me meme until my meme went memeside out and meme'd me harder than a meme memeing meme you fuggin meme :D
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A review for the videogame "Among Us"

This game has ruined my fucking life. I'm going to end it and take you all with me because I can't bear to look at anything anymore. Any shape I see is distorted into amogus, any time I hear the word suspicious, sus, task, vent, report, ANYTHING, human pattern recognition turns it into amogus. I close my eyes and i see amogus, i see jerma985 grinning as the gates of my soul are opened by amogus and I can feel the festering sclunge of words and shapes pour in, filling all that I am with the ringing noise of amogus
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Megaman

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
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Text-to-Speech Playing