[Copypasta] John Cena is an Asian person born into a white body

I get a feeling that John Cena is an Asian person born into a white body. He has a lot of discipline, he was the most hardworking WWE wrestler during his time at the WWE, always coming early and putting in the work. He is extremely wise beyond his years. When confronted with a stalker, he gave the guy life lessions. He is extremely patient and show the same restraint an Asian person has. I don't know if he read a lot of Art of War or Eastern philosophy when he was younger. He learning Chinese and playing piano shows me that he is very discipline and very eager about self improving. He is a millionaire and is famous, but yet, he still wants to improve. Interestingly enough, he didn't marry some hot female despite Nikki Bella expecting a proposal. He started dating and actually married Shay Shariatzadeh not long after meeting her. John Cena wanted a smart girl, and Shay had a career and wasn't just hot. So there are many examples that John Cena surprise me as a person. Not many white people can legit speak Mandarin for that long after learning it for a short period of time. His pronunciation isn't the best, but he has ways with his words and his mind is sharp. No wonder he is so successful.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now, moving from place to place, keeping ahead of the vaxmaxers, never staying anywhere too long, never letting my face become known. "It's great being vaxmaxed isn't it" the shopkeep says vacantly, to nobody in particular. In keeping with the act I reply to the Heinz Baked Beans Substitute 6 Pack (No Plastic) in my hand, something unrelated, with what I hope is a slightly bemused tone. It takes a lot longer to do my shopping these days, I can't simply march through the shop in an orderly fashion, taking what I need in a single trip, I have to absent mindedly shuffle back and forward between the aisles, never really displaying any intent. As unpresent as they are, the vaxmaxed would notice if I was too focused, too alert. A loud smashing sound in the distance almost blows my cover, I notice, and focus on the sound. The vaxmaxed around me slowly aim their distant gaze on me, but I'm able to save myself, I continue my neck jerk and turn it in to a series of spasms, I drop to the floor convulsing, the vaxmaxed around me quickly lose interest and continue on with their day. "That means it's working" one elderly lady comments to her milk as she passes. I continue the charade long enough to filter out most of the vaxmaxed sharing the aisle. It takes a while, and no insubstantial amount of sweat on my part, but I make it to the checkout. A morbidly obese woman directs the horde at the tills, seemingly oblivious to the cacophony of aberrant scan noises and blinking red lights above the entirely self service super checkout. I wait dutifully, not wanting to be noticed, not wanting to be set upon by the Asda Security Vax Checker team, it had taken all my best bluffing to get past them at the door, I almost chuckled when they believed my vax card was in the post but it was quickly stifled, a chuckled would have given me away, a chuckle would have seen me held down and injected with science juice.
April 2022

COVID

Coronavirus

Trumpet Skeleton of the Abyss

twitchquotes: 🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺💀💀💀💀💀 IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING you have been visited by trumpet skeleton of the abyss. good bones and calcium will come to you but only if you reply "thank mr skeltal" to this message and pasta it to 3 times!! 💀💀🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺🎺💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
twitch chat
August 2015

Classic

Stop posting useless stuff in chat

twitchquotes: Cᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ᴊᴜsᴛ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ᴜɴɴᴇᴄᴇssᴀʀɪʟʏ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴘᴏsᴛs ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ? Tʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ʀᴇᴀsᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ɪs ᴛᴏ ᴛʀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴀɪᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ. Wʜᴀᴛ ɪғ ᴡᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴊᴜsᴛ ɢᴀᴠᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇsᴛɪɴɢ ᴠɪᴇᴡs ᴀɴᴅ ᴏᴘɪɴɪᴏɴs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ ɪɴsᴛᴇᴀᴅ ᴏғ ᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴜsᴇʟᴇss sᴛᴜғғ? Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ I ʙᴇɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴄʜᴀᴛ, ᴛᴏ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜɪs ɴᴏɴsᴇɴsᴇ.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

PepeLaughYou

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠄⢀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⠿⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⠿⣿⣯⣼⣿⡿⠟⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⠿⢿⣿⣄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⣿⢿⡫⢞⣫⣥⣴⣶⣶⣦⣭⡲⣝⣟⡥⣚⣭⣥⣶⣶⣬⣭⣟⡳⣼⣻⣧⡀ ⠄⣿⠛⣮⠗⠉⠁⠐⠶⠄⠰⠶⠭⢉⣿⣿⣃⠉⠵⠶⠄⠰⠖⠂⠉⠓⢮⣟⠻⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣁⣰⣿⡭⠵⠶⠟⣛⣉⠴⠿⣣⣇⡿⠶⣍⣑⠻⠷⠾⢭⣤⣷⣈⣹⣿⡇ ⠄⠻⣿⣟⣻⢯⣍⣛⣛⣿⢭⣐⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣗⣨⢿⣛⣛⣛⣭⡿⣟⣿⡿⠄ ⠄⠄⣀⣍⡛⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣛⠄⠄ ⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣬⣥⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣛⣛⣛⣛⣭⣭⣶⣿⣦⠄ ⠄⣿⡈⠿⠟⠁⣀⣤⣄⣀⣐⡲⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣶⠉⣿⢻⣿⣿⠄ ⢀⣈⣤⣾⣏⣿⣿⣿⣿⢛⡭⠭⠤⡘⠸⢸⠃⣿⡇⣿⡇⡿⢇⠜⣠⢧⠞⣽⣿⠄ ⣾⡿⢹⣿⡿⠉⣿⣿⡟⡜⣢⣭⡒⢉⢠⢸⡄⣭⡅⠗⣢⠖⣡⡞⣥⣾⣾⠟⠁⠄ ⣿⡇⣾⣿⡇⣴⣿⣿⣇⢶⣿⡷⠚⣬⣬⣬⣷⣶⡾⢛⣽⣾⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⢟⡇⠿⠿⠇⣛⣭⣭⣍⢰⢆⣺⢨⣭⣭⣭⣥⣶⣿⡿⠿⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠈⠛⠈⠿⠿⣙⣭⣥⣤⣤⣴⣾⡇⣛⣛⣛⣛⣩⣥⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣄⣀⠄⠄
June 2021

Pepe

Tanner throws his disheveled red McDonald's hat

twitchquotes: Tanner throws his disheveled red McDonald's hat and apron onto the beer-stained couch. He turns on the computer monitor which nearly blinds him, and light floods the room, revealing the months worth of pizza boxes and beers strewn about the floor. He opens Microsoft Edge. His fingers stick to the keyboard as he types "Kripp's stream" into Bing search, ready for another successful day of roasting Kripp.
twitch chat
January 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

Text-to-Speech Playing