[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Nyan Cat

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November 2014

This deck looks spicy!

twitchquotes: This deck looks spicy! But not as spicy as Taco Bell’s new Sriracha Queserito SwiftRage tbSriracha β„’ Just $2.99 for a limited time only! LIVE MAS!
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad

Kripp gets married in a shack

twitchquotes: Rania: "why are you playing Diablo 3, Kripp? How can we afford Big Fat Greek Wedding with 5k Diablo viewers?" But the Kripp doesn't listen. He plays Diablo 3 and loses all his viewers and gets married in a shack.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

I can't believe it's already MLK eve

πŸ’I CAN'T πŸ•Ά BELIEVE IT'S ALREADY πŸ’ƒMπŸ‘L πŸ‘K πŸ‘ πŸ—£ EVE!! TONIGHT πŸŒ› WE WILL GATHER πŸ‘ͺ WITH OUR FAMILIES❀ NOT ONLY TO PRAYπŸ™ TO MLK πŸ‘AND LET HIM KNOWπŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ’¦ WHAT GIFTS🎁 WE WOULD 😚LIKE πŸ˜™ TO RECEIVEπŸ† ON MLK DAY 🌞 BUT TO REMEMBER πŸ˜‚ THAT MLK❀ IS THE REAL REASON 🎢 FOR 🎡THE 🎢 SEASONβœ” SEND THIS TO TEN OTHER TRUE MLK FANSπŸ’― OR YOUR BROTHERS πŸ™‹ AND SISTERSπŸ™† WILL BE FOREVER OPPRESSED πŸ˜”
January 2024

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

MLK Day

NOT ANOTHER CHILDREN'S CARD GAME

twitchquotes: Kripp sighs sitting at the dinner table. β€œI have to play hearthstone again, FUCK!” Rania consoles him, β€œIt’s okay sweetheart. I love you.” Kripp responds in tears β€œI have been having fun playing POE but I only got 6k viewers last night, how will we eat if I don’t play that goddamned Hearthstone for these morons!” Rania wraps her arms around Kripp’s neck, β€œIt’s okay baby, it’ll be different, when Artifact comes out!” Kripp lets out a scream, β€œNOT ANOTHER FUCKING CHILDREN’S CARD GAME!”
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Artifact

Text-to-Speech Playing