[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019

With this chant I summon spam to the chat!

twitchquotes: ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・ﾟClickity Clack, Clickity Clack, with this chant I summon spam to the chat! ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・ﾟ
twitch chat
November 2014

Classic

Goblin

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⠤⢶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠛⢻⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⠶⣏⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⣈⣿⡿⢷⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⠤⠤⠤⠠⠾⠷⠾⠿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⣛⣋⣉⣁⡀⢳⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⡀⢰⡆⢀⡤⠄⢰⡂⠉⠛⠁⢹⣿⠿⠛⢩⣥⣶⣿⠃⢸⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄ ⠄⠄⠄⣧⡄⡇⢸⠁⣶⣧⠄⣤⣿⣧⠈⠁⣶⣷⠄⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⣼⡇ ⠄⠄⢶⣌⡁⠉⠘⠄⠈⢁⣔⠉⢹⣿⢆⢠⣬⣥⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⠟⣠⠶⢋⡽⠁ ⠄⠄⢠⠛⠃⣤⢾⣿⠃⣎⣹⣿⣿⣷⠿⢆⣿⠿⠿⠟⣛⡛⠿⣿⣼⠃⣶⡞⠃⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣼⢱⠖⡀⡀⢿⣿⠿⠛⣁⣋⣭⠖⣌⠻⢿⣿⠟⡆⣹⣥⡏⣀⡄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢿⡈⢹⡎⣾⡇⠱⠈⡁⠄⣶⠉⣉⢁⢸⣿⡀⠈⠁⣆⣰⣿⠏⣰⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣓⠘⠃⢛⣠⣥⣤⣶⡶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣴⠾⢋⣌⠻⠂⣉⣉⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣴⡃⣿⡿⢡⣆⢉⣛⣩⣭⣤⣶⣶⣦⣬⣭⣥⣶⡶⠇⣿⡟⢰⣷⡌⣿⣷⡀⠄ ⢀⠻⡇⠛⢃⡟⣿⢰⣌⢙⠻⠿⢿⣿⡿⢻⠟⣁⠉⢡⡆⠋⠞⣸⠟⡁⠉⣿⣧⠄ ⠘⢧⡄⣤⣤⢠⡟⣸⣿⣿⣧⣀⣠⣜⣠⣤⣼⣿⡇⠸⢃⣼⡄⢃⣼⠃⣤⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
November 2021

Wait Aurateur is actually bald?

twitchquotes: I’ve been blind since birth. After restorative eye surgery I got a new lease on life. I can drive, watch TV, see the sunset. But more importantly, I can finally truly watch my favorite twitch streamer, Aurateur. From the sounds of it he is a god gamer and the chat is so rambunctious it’s always a good time. Alright, time to log into twitch and see what he’s up to........ Wait this guy is actually bald? lmao I’m outta here
twitch chat
November 2020
Aurateur

Best Polish one arm player

twitchquotes: i, my name Andrzej Waclawski, I'm Polish war veteran. In war of world 2 I lose right arm, never to grow back. My dream of become rank one superstar Polish Cardstone player make shattered forever. I like to get tip from the Kripp how I can become best Polish one arm player. Please no copytovski pasterovski
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
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