[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Watermelon

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆ
ascii art
July 2017

Where were you when TL beat Invictus fucking Gaming

twitchquotes: Where were you when TL beat Invictus fucking Gaming, the reigning World Champions, 3-1? This series is going down in history. No one will ever dare to call NA a wildcard region again. It's not just C9 anymore, the gap is closed. 8 years of being memed as a 4fun region, 8 years of people laughing at Doublelift being an international choker, enough is enough. We poked this monster too much, it finally got pissed, woke up, and it's fucking hungry.
twitch chat
May 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Hi Tyler, Cakeyler here

twitchquotes: hello tyler this is your abomination of a child, cakeyler. ever since you brought me into this world i have known nothing but pain due to my horrible mutations caused by the way you birthed me. every moment of my life is constant agony and this has made me pure toxic cakeyler. anyone who eats me will die except for you of course my father. feed me to your enemies or to anyone who is not as toxic as yourself. i love you and the damage we can do together. cakeyler signing out.๏ปฟ
twitch chat
June 2016
Tyler1

Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022

The default dance is truly a masterpiece

twitchquotes: The ๐Ÿ•บ๐Ÿปdefault dance๐Ÿ•บ๐Ÿป is truly a ๐Ÿ–Šmasterpiece. NeverโŒin all of history๐Ÿ•–๐Ÿ•—๐Ÿ•˜๐Ÿ•™๐Ÿ•šhas such an artistic masterpiece๐Ÿ–Š ever been created. The choreography๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿป is possibly the most beautiful๐Ÿ˜ sight๐Ÿ‘€ ever beheld by the human๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ eye๐Ÿ‘. The sharp ๐Ÿ”ชsound of the SLAP๐Ÿ‘ when the playerโ€™s hands๐Ÿ‘ collide perfectly ๐Ÿ’ฏ with the beat of the song ๐ŸŽต sends a bone chillingโ˜ ๏ธ shiver down my spine, every single time ๐Ÿ•˜I hear it๐Ÿ‘‚๐Ÿป. I find my self watching ๐Ÿ‘€my in-game ๐ŸŽฎavatar performing this phenomenal dance ritual ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿปfor hours๐Ÿ•ง on end.
twitch chat
November 2018

Emoji Pasta

Fortnite

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