[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
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More Copypastas

Coca Cola shortage

twitchquotes: THIS JUST IN: Stores across the world are reporting a major shortage of 'store brand Cola'. Sources indicate that over 20 million bottles were sold within minutes of an endorsement by some dirty Romanian living in Athens.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I want a man who is a cunning linguist

twitchquotes: "Are you sure you've ever pleasured a woman before, poppet?" Mother asked with a snear, unamused by the clumsy performance of a rapper who couldn't use his tongue. "I'm doing my best, yo!" he replied, muffled between Mother's thighs. "You talk a big game, Mr. Dab, but you are proving to be quite a disappointment." The tattoo-faced man lifted his head aghast, his voice raising in pitch, "I got you a limo, yo, what else do you want?" Mother chuckled, "I want a man who is a cunning linguist"
twitch chat
May 2019
MOONMOON

🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES🎄🎄!!

🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES🎄🎄!! Now that it’s finally DICKmas 👅💦Santa’s about to slide 🎅🏾😉 down your hot 🔥 hot 🔥chimney tonight. So lick 💦💋those juicy candy canes and drink up that creamy eggnog🍼, it’s about to get wet down at Santa’s workshop🍆🍆! Don’t forgot to slide down that XXXtra 🎅🏾🎅🏾 big North Pole, and make sure your 🍪 cookie 🍪is yummy enough for Santa to eat👄! 👀 But are you bad enough to handle Santa’s giant juicy 8=candy👊🏼COCK=D💦?? Send this to 🔟 of your baddest bitch elves💁🏼💁🏾 If you get 5️⃣ back, youre on the naughty list this year🍆💦! If you get 🔟 back you better be ready for Santa’s hot ♨️CUMlate☕️💦😭 If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back you’ve got the most bitchin 🍬peppermint 🍬pussy in the North Pole! ❄️⛄ Hope you get to blow 🌬 lots of XXXmas 🎄dick, and that you get lots of XXXmas 🎄CUMMIES 💝💝 HAVE A SLUTTY 💦🍆👅DICKMAS YOU HOE HOE HOE!!! 🎅🏾🎅🏿🎅🏽🎅🏼
April 2022

Emoji Pasta

Christmas

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

Anime girl 11

⡿⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⡴⣋⣵⣮⠇⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠿⠋⠉ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣯⣾⣿⡿⣳⡟⣰⣿⣠⣂⡀⢀⠄⢸⡄⠄⢀⣈⢆⣱⣤⡀⢄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⡟⣹⡿⣸⣿⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣾⢻⣆⣿⣿⣯⢿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣀⣤ ⠄⠄⣼⡟⣿⠏⢀⣿⣇⣿⣏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⡇⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠋ ⡆⣸⡟⣼⣯⠏⣾⣿⢸⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠸⠁⢹⡿⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⡇⡟⣸⢟⣫⡅⣶⢆⡶⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣛⠃⠰⠆⠈⠁⠈⠙⠈⠻⣿⢹⡏⠄ ⣧⣱⡷⣱⠿⠟⠛⠼⣇⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣰⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠈⠄⠄ ⡏⡟⢑⠃⡠⠂⠄⠄⠈⣾⢻⣿⣿⡿⡹⡳⠋⠉⠁⠉⠙⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄ ⡇⠁⢈⢰⡇⠄⠄⡙⠂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣱⣿⡗⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠈⢰⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⠴⣄⣡⢄⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⡇⢀⠄⠤⠈⠁⣠⣠⣸⢠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢀⠄⠄⣿⣿⣷⣬⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣟⢷⡶⢗⡰⣿⣿⠇⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⡟⢀⠃⠄⢸⡄⠁⣸ ⣿⠄⠄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢄⡆⠄⢀⣪⡆⠄⣿ ⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣟⣻⣩⣾⣃⣴⣿⣿⡇⠸⢾
January 2020

Weebs

twitch emotes in non-twitch chats

twitchquotes: Is it just me, or do people who say twitch emotes out loud or type twitch emotes in non-twitch chats are super cringe worthy? The whole idea of saying twitch emotes out loud or typing them out rather than just doing the action that the emote describes is just dumb to me. Instead of saying/typing "Kappa", why not type "lol" or actually laugh like a normal person.
twitch chat
July 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing