[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

i graduated top of my class from burger king

twitchquotes: you fucking vegan, ill have you know i graduated top of my class from burger king university in burger flipping and have flipped over 9000 burgers in my day you dumb vegan, but you wouldn't know that would you you soy muncher? If you said that to my face I would be flipping patties all over your vegan face and you'd be full of my meat before you even knew what was happening.
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

Why Attack on Titan is a flawed anime

As a big fan of AoT, one big plothole that has always bugged me from the first episode is the exclusion of genitals. As titans are very clearly based on humans, and canonically are created from humans, why did Isayama decide to exclude Titan genitals? I am not a homo, (I have 2 girl friends) but seeing Eren transform into a titan with a 12 foot long cock as the people of Marley watch in horror would easily made this anime my favourite of all time. I think we should cancel Isayama on Twitter and get him to realise his mistake and redraw his previous chapters accurately.
January 2021

Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta v3

Itโ€™s the end of May the Fourth 4๏ธโƒฃ ๐ŸŒŒ๐Ÿ˜ซ but that means the beginning of ๐ŸŽธ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿพ๐ŸŒตCincHOE de Mayo ๐ŸŽธ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿพ๐ŸŒต get ready to get your TACO eaten ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆ๐ŸŒฎ and gulp Papi's BURRITO ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐ŸŒฏ๐Ÿ’ฆ send this to 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ of your main ๐Ÿ’…๐ŸพPUTAS ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿพwho need to be stuffed by a CHORIZO ๐ŸŒญ๐Ÿ’ฆ if you get 5๏ธโƒฃ back you're a border hopping ๐Ÿ’๐ŸฝCHOLA ๐Ÿ’๐ŸฝIf you get 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back you're a ๐Ÿ’š Green card HOE๐Ÿ’š If you get 1๏ธโƒฃ5๏ธโƒฃ back you're the๐Ÿ’ƒ๐ŸฝTelenovela main BITCH ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿฝ If you get 0๏ธโƒฃ back you're getting deported by Trump! ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฝ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿšง๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ Have a happy CincHOE de Mayo and don't let la Migra get you!!
May 2022

Cinco de Mayo

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs

twitchquotes: SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

tyler imo u are the best league of legends player

twitchquotes: tyler imo u are the best league of legends player in the history, you show skills and wits beyond anyone else who played the game, and is improving on a daily basis. you show great promise as long as you keep doing what you're doing right now. cheers
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing