[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Artifact is a timeless classic

twitchquotes: Valve's done it again! Another timeless classic that puts its competition to shame. Make no mistake, Artifact will become king of its genre, and Hearthstone and MTG will become relics of the past. When my wife's boyfriend showed me this game I knew it would be worth my time.
twitch chat
January 2019

Hearthstone

Artifact

Just me and EA hanging out

twitchquotes: Just me and ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’•EA๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฐ, hanging out I wanted some Star Wars๐ŸŒŸ so I started to pout ๐Ÿ˜ž He asked if I was down โฌ‡for something yummy ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ† and I asked what and he said he'd give me his ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฆlooties!๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฐ Yeah! Yeah!๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฆ I earn them!๐Ÿ’ฆ I buy them!๐Ÿ’ฆ I purchase them whole๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ˜ It makes ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’˜EA๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ˜Šhappy๐Ÿ˜Š so it's my only goal... ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜ซHarder EA! Harder EA! ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’• 1 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ, 2 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ, 3 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ, 4๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ I'm ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’˜EA's๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ‘‘Disney princess ๐Ÿ‘‘but I'm also a consumer whore! ๐Ÿ’Ÿ He makes me OP๐Ÿ’—!He makes me feel good๐Ÿ’œ! ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜He makes me feel everything a whale should!~ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’˜Wa-What!๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ‘‘๏ปฟ
twitch chat
November 2017

I hope Seraphine wins xD

twitchquotes: I hope Seraphine wins xD. Iโ€™m a Seraphine main and sheโ€™s just so fun!! People get so mad at the constant singing, and her voice is so cute, like when she sings about about being in K/DA! She is so beautiful and sings like a goddess just like Twitch Chat xD
twitch chat
November 2020

League of Legends

NOW RISE, DARTH DONGER

twitchquotes: เผผ อกเผผู„อœเผฝเผฝ NOW RISE, DARTH DONGER. /{โ–€็›Šโ–€}\ Where is Reynad? Is he okay? เผผ อกเผผ ฬฏส–เผฝเผฝ It seems in your Spam, you killed him. /{โ–€็›Šโ–€}\ What!? HE WAS ALIVE! I FELT IT. Noooooooooooo! เผผ อกเผผู„อœเผฝเผฝ
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad

Never click on scam links, try typing the URL by hand

twitchquotes: Summoners, beware! The consequences can be quite Sivir if you click on links promising free Riot Points. Never click on links that you donโ€™t trust - instead, try typing the URL in by hand.
twitch chat
July 2014
Riot Games

League of Legends

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing