[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Applejack

β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘.’.β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“ ▓▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░░▐▄░░▓▓▓▓▓ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“
ascii art
November 2014

Yoshi with Mario's body

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–„β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–“β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–€β–€β–„ β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–“β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’
ascii art
September 2018

Doublelift's not even the best ADC on CLG

twitchquotes: Doublelift best ADC NA? Doublelift's not even the best ADC on CLG
twitch chat
February 2015
Riot Games

League of Legends

Full of acknowledgment of the farce he has become

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Fabulous

βŠ‚_ヽ γ€€ οΌΌοΌΌ οΌΏ γ€€γ€€ οΌΌ(γ€€β€’_β€’) F γ€€γ€€γ€€ <γ€€βŒ’γƒ½ A γ€€γ€€γ€€/ γ€€ へ＼ B γ€€γ€€ /γ€€γ€€/γ€€οΌΌοΌΌ U γ€€γ€€ οΎšγ€€γƒŽγ€€γ€€ ヽ_぀ L γ€€γ€€/γ€€/ O γ€€ /γ€€/| U γ€€(γ€€(ヽ S γ€€|γ€€|、＼ γ€€| δΈΏ οΌΌ βŒ’) γ€€| |γ€€γ€€) / `γƒŽ )γ€€γ€€LοΎ‰ (_／
ascii art
December 2020
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing