[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Ameng meets Bumper in a hallway

twitchquotes: Bumper broke into a cold sweat. There he was across the hallway, a man whose name that brought chills down his spine. Bumper looked down, hoping to avoid direct eye contact. "A-ameng," Bumper stuttered. "What up, virgin" Ameng boomed. Bumper braced himself but it was too late. Ameng's 5000 tonne shoulder slammed into his, the movement causing air waves across the room. Bumper flew back and the concrete wall chipped around him. His shoulder was definitely broken. "Later, nerd." Ameng chuckled.
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

I am not a simp.

twitchquotes: And I want to say this to the kings in the audience. I’ve made my mistakes in my chase for coochie. But in all of my years of chad life, I have never simped– never simped for a girl. I’ve earned every bit of cooch. And in all of my years of chad life, I have never paid for the meal. Because people have got to know whether or not I’m a simp. Well, I’m not a simp. I’ve never simped for any girl I’ve got. I am not a simp.
twitch chat
July 2020

Simps

Negatron Cloak

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⠞⠛⢶⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡶⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⣰⠇⣈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⡗⢿⣶⣶⣤⣴⣾⠟⢠⡏⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⠇⢶⣤⣀⡺⠿⠋⣠⡾⠄⠄⢤⣶⣤⣄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣷⡄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣣⣿⣷⣌⡛⢿⣿⣾⡟⠁⢤⣤⣀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠙⢿⣷⠄ ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⢭⣶⣇⠄⠻⣿⣧⡀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠙⠇ ⢰⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣻⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠹⣿⣿⣄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣴⡄⠄ ⢸⡿⣱⣿⣿⣏⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣦⠄⠈⢿⡿⣱⣿ ⠘⣵⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⢾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⡜⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠁⣿⡿ ⢸⣶⣍⢿⢧⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠘⡜⣿⣷⣴⣦⣀⠘⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⢇⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠘⡽⡟⢫⣴⣶⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠙⢷⣿⡭⠡⠆⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⠄⢫⠄⣀⡹⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠃⠄⢀⣚⣭⣭⣭⡍⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣛⣂⠄⣼⡿⣣⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣁⣀⣈⣩⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣭⡶⠋⠄⠄⠄
January 2021

League of Legends

Teamfight Tactics

Cute gamer girl

twitchquotes: Thijs I am a 22 year old gamer girl in search of a gamer man. I have been watching your stream for years and really like your deck. If you want to give a cute gamer girl like me a chance whisper me. ;) HAHA Just kidding, it's still Tanner you fucking gullible idiot lmfao. Anyway, the gym awaits, see ya man good talk.
twitch chat
June 2019
Thijs

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Nani the fuck did you just fucking iimasu about watashi

Nani the fuck did you just fucking iimasu about watashi, you chiisai bitch desuka? Watashi’ll have anata know that watashi graduated top of my class in Nihongo 3, and watashi’ve been involved in iroirona Nihongo tutoring sessions, and watashi have over sanbyaku perfect test scores. Watashi am trained in kanji, and watashi is the top letter writer in all of southern California. Anata are nothing to watashi but just another weaboo. Watashi will korosu anata the fuck out with vocabulary the likes of which has never been mimasu’d before on this continent, mark watashino fucking words. Anata thinks anata can get away with hanashimasing that kuso to watashi over the intaaneto? Omou again, fucker. As we hanashimasu, watashi am contacting watashino secret netto of otakus across the USA, and anatano IP is being traced right now so you better junbishimasu for the ame, ujimushi. The ame that korosu’s the pathetic chiisai thing anata calls anatano life. You’re fucking shinimashita’d, akachan.
June 2021

Weebs

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