[Copypasta] If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The largest object in the solar system

twitchquotes: Hey reynad, I'm working on a science project and I need to find the largest object in the solar system. What's the measurements of your forehead? 4Head
twitch chat
October 2015
Reynad

Bush outdated, Obama overrated, Hillary eliminated

twitchquotes: Jebaited BUSH OUTDATED Jebaited OBAMA OVERRATED Jebaited HILLARY ELIMINATED Jebaited TRUMP CONGRATULATED Jebaited LONG HAVE WE WAITED Jebaited NOW WE EMIGRATED Jebaited
twitch chat
November 2016

2016 US Election

Henry Dongerman and his pet donger Mr Mittens

twitchquotes: Hey my name is Henry Dongerman I lost my pet donger. Here's a picture of him [α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½α•—] if you can help find him I would be eternally grateful he means the world to me. Mr. Mittens is his name if it helps share this around and pray to lord donger to help find him. His favorite song is α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΰΊˆΰΌ½α•— HARDER BETTER FASTER DONGER α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΰΊˆΰΌ½α•— so try playing that he may come
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Bullish market makes me hard

When the stocks πŸ“ŠπŸ“ go up πŸ“ˆπŸ’Έ, my dick goes too πŸ†β¬†οΈπŸ˜³. Bullish πŸ‚ market 🏬 makes me hard πŸ¦΄πŸ’¦. All the countries πŸ³οΈπŸ΄πŸ΄β€β˜ οΈπŸπŸš©πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡³ try to recover πŸ”„ from corona 🦠 so the money πŸ’°πŸ’΅πŸ’Έ flows 🌬 into my pocket πŸ’³. Soon πŸ”œ there will be a crash πŸ“‰πŸ˜­πŸ₯ΊπŸ˜– and the bears 🐻 will crawl 🚼 out of their holes πŸ•³. Then they cut off my greedy dick βœ‚οΈπŸ†πŸ©Έ if I don’t ❌ eat ’em out πŸ‘…πŸ˜Έ. I must turn into a bear πŸ‚βž‘οΈπŸ» and make 🀌🏼 more money πŸ’°πŸ’΅πŸ’Έ and eat some honey 🐻🍯. When I’m done βœ… I’ll throw a party πŸŽ‰πŸ·πŸΎ and eat your ass πŸ‘…πŸ‘.
October 2021

Emoji Pasta

WallStreetBets

Elephant

β–‘β–’β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“(O)β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆ β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆ
November 2014
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