[Copypasta] Streamers should eat before they start streaming

twitchquotes: Streamers should eat before they start streaming. Eating while streaming, unless you put other content on and take the camera off you, is extremely bad manners and disgusting. "Streaming is a real job!" It is. But most streamers dont treat it like a real job. Between failing to make schedules, acting in a way that would be considered unprofessional, constantly calling off, etc etc. Content creation can be a real job. But most dont treat it as one.
twitch chat
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hi Kripp, this is Pogo’s mom

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Pogo’s mom. I noticed you haven’t been picking my son for your team in gym class. Pogo has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesn’t make it easy on him when you reroll and say, "We’re never taking Pogo". I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Pogo has mech synergy and can be combined into one big Pogo if you have 3! Why don’t you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

I sexually Identify as

Shrek 2

⢋⣴⠒⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿ ⢾⣿⣀⣿⡘⢿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠻⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠈⠙⢿⣦⣉⡁⠄⠄⣴⣶⣿⣿⢷⡶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠛⠻⠃⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⣀⣀⣴⡟⢩⠁⠩⣝⢂⢨⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⡛⣳⣶⣤⡘⠿⢋⣡ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⣈⣱⣮⣿⣷⡾⠟⠋ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠿⠛⠛⣻⣿⠉⠛⠋⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡠⠄⢒⣤⣟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣀⣀⣉⣉⣠⣽⣿⣟⠻⣿⣿⡆⢻ ⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠋⠉⣿⣿⣶⣿⣟⣛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣿⡇⣸ ⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢿ ⡋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄ ⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠂⠠ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡿⠄⢈ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⡿⠟⢋⣴⣿⢿⡋⠄⠄ ⣠⣴⠶⠖⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⡿⢫⠞⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⢿⣧⣶⠏⠄
September 2020

Shrek

Kappa

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November 2014

Classic

Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front

twitchquotes: Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front. When it comes to sexuality, I'm about as hetero as they come. If a gay guy came on to me, I'd be like, "No way, bro. I'm a straight-up party boy who's into chicks." Yup, one gay dude wouldn't stand a chance. It would take at least four or five gay guys strapping me down to make it inside me. Sorry, fellas, that's just how straight I am. And even then I wouldn't make it easy. I'd be like, "Hey look! There goes George Michael!" And they'd all shriek "Where?!" at once, and I'd make a break for it, and they'd be like, "He's getting away! Chase him! I want his butt!" But I wouldn't just give them my butt. They'd have to take it. And once they got me strapped down, I'd stop fighting it because that would be giving them what they want. And I don't want them to enjoy it. If anyone's going to enjoy it, it's going to be me. So, I'd just relax into it and taunt them by telling them how ripped and sexy I find them and letting them know how much I'm enjoying myself. So, even though I'd have a bunch of ripped guys all taking turns on my butt, I'd still be enjoying it. But only because I forced myself to. It's not like I could fight these guys off. There are too many of them and they want me too much. What am I, Chuck Norris?" I'm not against homosexuality, though. I say to each his own. You're free to do whatever you want.
twitch chat
February 2020

KappaPride

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