[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

There is no "random number generator" in any games

twitchquotes: I have a REQUEST: could you please stop saying "RNG"? There is no "random number generator" in any games. It's all PSEUDO-random number generator. So therefore it should be PNG or PRNG and not RNG. I am a mathematician, this is important to me, thank you. Using incorrect terms make you lose unprofessional and amateurish and make you lose credibility
twitch chat
April 2019

Ahegao

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣶⣤⣄⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣜⠿⠿⣿⣿⣧⢓ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡠⢛⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣽⣋⠻⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡻⣧⡠⣭⣭⣿⡧ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⡟⣿⢻⠃⣻⣨⣻⠿⡀⣝⡿⣿⣿⣷⣜⣜⢿⣝⡿⡻⢔ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡟⣷⢿⢈⣚⣓⡡⣻⣿⣶⣬⣛⣓⣉⡻⢿⣎⠢⠻⣴⡾⠫ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠃⢹⡼⢸⣿⣿⣿⣦⣹⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠷⣎⡼⠆⣿⠵⣫ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠸⡟⡜⣩⡄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⢀⢀⣿⣷⣿⣿⡐⡇⡄⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⢶⢻⣧⣖⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣇⡟⣇⣷⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣆⣤⣽⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣦⣴⡇⣿⢨⣾⣿⢹⢸ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⠊⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣫⢱⢺⡇⡏⣿⣿⣸⡼ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡿⠄⣿⣷⣾⡍⣭⣶⣿⣿⡌⣼⣹⢱⠹⣿⣇⣧ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⠁⣤⣭⣭⡌⢁⣼⣿⣿⣿⢹⡇⣭⣤⣶⣤⡝⡼ ⠄⣀⠤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡏⣈⡻⡿⠃⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡼⠁⣿⣿⣿⡿⢷⢸ ⢰⣷⡧⡢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⢠⡛⠿⠄⠠⠬⠿⣿⠭⠭⢱⣇⣀⣭⡅⠶⣾⣷⣶ ⠈⢿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡛⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠃⠄⠄⡜⠄⠄⣤⢀⣶⣮⡍⣴ ⠄⠈⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⢩⣝⠃⠄⠄⢀⡄⡎⠄⠄⠄⠇⠄⠄⠅⣴⣶⣶⠄⣶
January 2021

Weebs

Dog food lid

twitchquotes: Hello everyone! I'm entering streams to say something random! Did you know "dog food lid" backwards is "dildo of god"? Good bye everyone!
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Hello I'm a 1 month old banana

twitchquotes: Hello im a 1 month old banana. Since i fall off the tree i watch leek of legends and want to become Soraka’s bestest banana but im afraid Wukong will eat me. Pls dont laugh at my story!
twitch chat
November 2014
Trick2g

Catten Eatarrian

twitchquotes: "This pasta is delicious, Rania," says Kripp as he receives his vegan foodie. Rania replies, "That's not pasta. It's cat." As the Kripp vomits in horror, Trump removes the Rania mask. "It seems you've catten Eatarrian."
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing