[Copypasta] His name was Norman Reedus

I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Biden x Trump smut fanfic

August 2021

Donald Trump

Joe Biden

Party Parrot

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠿⢋⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⠋⠀⢾⣿⡆⢠⣾⡿⢿⣦⢸⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⣾⡏⠀⠈⣿⡇⠀⠹⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⢻⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣆⣰⣿⠃⠀⠀⣸⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠟⠀⠻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⣾⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⣶⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀
November 2020

Do you even ❚█══█❚

twitchquotes: KRIPP do you even ❚█══█❚
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta v2

It's Cinco de mayo... 👀🌮🎉 but all I want 🙏🏻 is cinco DICKS 🌯 in my May-OUTH 😩👅💦 Today the SEXicans 😍🇲🇽 beat the French 😒🇫🇷 at the Battle of Puebla 🔫☠ and now you're gonna get your piñata beat 😜😩 with a huge stick 😳🎉 but ❗️ONLY❗️ if you send 📲 this to 5️⃣ amigos 👬 you'd cross borders ➡️ for 👌🏻💯 Get 5️⃣ back 🔙 and you'll find the Juan for you tonight ❤️☺️😘
May 2022

Cinco de Mayo

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

Hold on let me fix my hair

twitchquotes: KappaClaus let me take this hat off KappaRoss dear me my hair! NotLikeThis TheThing this is worse! NotLikeThis Ahh much better Kappa
twitch chat
February 2016
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing