[Copypasta] good news, my sisters pregnant!

good news, my sisters pregnant! i'm going to be a .... uncle, you thought i was going to say Dad but i stopped banging my sister years ago
March 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Dude, your donger is showing!

twitchquotes: (Κ˜α—©Κ˜') Dude, your donger is showing (Κ˜α—©Κ˜')
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hippo

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β€ƒβ€ƒβ–’β–’β–’β€ƒβ€ƒβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β€ƒβ€ƒβ–’β–’β€ƒβ€ƒβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆ(◐)β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β€ƒβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β€ƒβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β€ƒβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β€ƒβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Decided I will no longer be paying taxes

Decided I will no longer be paying taxes. What are they gonna do, tax me more? Go ahead. I wont pay those either Oh im going to prison? The one paid for by my tax dollars? Sorry. Didn't pay em. Now there is no prison. I am at least 3 steps ahead of the government at all times.
June 2021

Kripp's kidney stone surgery

twitchquotes: There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Qtpie, this is your dad here

twitchquotes: qtpie, this is your dad here. i just wanted to say how proud of you i am son, always hiding in your room playing your video games, talking to your internet friends. your mom and i think that's swell and we just wanted to let you know we love you. pls no copy dadderino
twitch chat
March 2016
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing