[Copypasta] I tried to go help

Damn saw this one guy getting beat up by 2 other dudes today so I tried to go help, didnโ€™t stand a chance against the 3 of us.
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

My husband of 5 years bought me Reddit Gold for my anniversary

My 5-Year anniversary with my husband was last week. The traditional gift for 5 years is silverware. I wanted a new set and told my husband which he could get me as a gift. I knew he wanted an Apple Watch and bought that as my gift to him. On the day of our anniversary, I logged onto Reddit to find dozens of my posts and comments guilded. I found it odd as I donโ€™t post terribly often and the guilded comments were old. Itโ€™s also the first time Iโ€™ve received Reddit gold. When the time came to exchange gifts, he gleefully opened his Apple Watch and begin setting it up. I figured Iโ€™m all the excitement he forgot to give me my gift so I gently prodded him. He told me to check Reddit. Ladies and Gentlemen, my husband GUILDED me 24 times as an anniversary gift. Heโ€™s a bit of a jokester, so I figured my real gift was coming. But Reddit, itโ€™s been a week. Do I say something? Buy the silverware myself? Some combination of the two? I feel if I donโ€™t say something then the cycle will repeat itself.
September 2021

Reddit

Please put an NSFW tag on this

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like โ€œwhat the fuckโ€ and โ€œcall the policeโ€. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
December 2021

Reddit

DONGER TO ME

twitchquotes: โŠนโ‹›โ‹‹( เบˆู„อœเบˆ )โ‹Œโ‹šโŠน DONGER TO ME, SQWAAK โŠนโ‹›โ‹‹( เบˆู„อœเบˆ )โ‹Œโ‹šโŠน
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Ben Shapiro asks his mom for Robux

Now, letโ€™s say ๐Ÿ—ฃ hypothetically, you ๐Ÿ‘†, my mother ๐Ÿ‘ช. Were to give ๐ŸŽ me, your ๐Ÿ‘‰ son ๐Ÿ™Žโ€โ™‚๏ธ, your ๐Ÿ‘‰ credit ๐Ÿ’ธ card ๐Ÿ’ณ information ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ. So I ๐Ÿ‘ฅ could make ๐Ÿ›  a purchase ๐Ÿ’ฒ of 500 ๐Ÿ’ฏ robux ๐Ÿ‘ on the Roblox.com/store. Contrary to what my sister ๐Ÿ‘ฑโ€โ™€๏ธ will have you ๐Ÿ‘† believe ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿป, I ๐Ÿ‘ฅ have done โœ… a very โ€ผ good ๐Ÿ‘Œ job ๐Ÿ™†โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿคต of doing my chores ๐Ÿงผ, including ๐Ÿ“ฒ, but ๐Ÿ‘ not limited ๐Ÿ”’ to; The dishes ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿ‘ˆ๐Ÿผ, the laundry and the taking ๐Ÿ‘Š out the trash โ›น๏ธโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿ—‘.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

All hail Kripparrian of the House TSM

twitchquotes: ใƒฝเผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰ Hear, hear. All hail Kripparrian of the House TSM, the First of His Name, The One With No Life, King of Wraeclast, Prince of the Docks, Papparrian of the First Men, Emperor of the Great Sarn Sea, Breaker of DeSync, and Father of Cattarian, RIP, First and Last of His Name. ใƒฝเผผเบˆู„อœเบˆเผฝ๏พ‰
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing