[Copypasta] War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

BREAKING NEWS

twitchquotes: ๏ผข๏ผฒ๏ผฅ๏ผก๏ผซ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ๏ผง ๏ผฎ๏ผฅ๏ผท๏ผณ๏ผš ๏ผก๏ฝ†๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ’๏ฝ•๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ™ ๏ผฒ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ™๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ™ ๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŒ ๏ผณ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝ—๏ฝŽ๏ผ‡๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ•๏ฝ“ ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝ—๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝŽ๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ๏ฝ† ๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŽ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

HEY krIpP its BeN BRoDe HerE

twitchquotes: SeemsGood HEY krIpP its BeN BRoDe HerE AnD We HEre at bliZZard All WhAt to THank yOU FoR MakIรกng ouR ChILDarEns GaMe POpular by STAYING PJSalt ThaT is Why I Have CoMpIlEd a TeaM of ProGramers To mAke Sure YOUr OPo nENTS Are AlwayS LuCkier ThAn YOu in Arena . ThEse ProGramers Will Make sure to kEEp YoU salty so we can keEp GeTting PAychecks OF My ChildrenS Game SeemsGood
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Do you guys mind not spamming the chat so much?

twitchquotes: ๐”ป๐•  ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•˜๐•ฆ๐•ช๐•ค ๐•ž๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•• ๐•Ÿ๐• ๐•ฅ ๐•ค๐•ก๐•’๐•ž๐•ž๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜ ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•”๐•™๐•’๐•ฅ ๐•ค๐•  ๐•ž๐•ฆ๐•”๐•™? ๐•€'๐•ž ๐•ฃ๐•–๐•’๐•๐•๐•ช ๐•ฅ๐•ฃ๐•ช๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜ ๐•ฅ๐•  ๐•ก๐•’๐•ช ๐•’๐•ฅ๐•ฅ๐•–๐•Ÿ๐•ฅ๐•š๐• ๐•Ÿ ๐•ฅ๐•  ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•ค๐•ฅ๐•ฃ๐•–๐•’๐•ž ๐•’๐•Ÿ๐•• ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•˜๐•ฆ๐•ช๐•ค ๐•’๐•ฃ๐•– ๐••๐•š๐•ค๐•ฅ๐•ฃ๐•’๐•”๐•ฅ๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜ ๐•ž๐•–. ๐•€๐•— ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•˜๐•ฆ๐•ช๐•ค ๐•ฃ๐•–๐•’๐•๐•๐•ช ๐•”๐•’๐•ฃ๐•–๐•• ๐•’๐•“๐• ๐•ฆ๐•ฅ ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•ข๐•ฆ๐•’๐•๐•š๐•ฅ๐•ช ๐• ๐•— ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•ค๐•ฅ๐•ฃ๐•–๐•’๐•ž ๐• ๐•ฃ ๐•„๐• ๐• ๐•Ÿ ๐•™๐•š๐•ž๐•ค๐•–๐•๐•— ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•จ๐• ๐•ฆ๐•๐•• ๐•ค๐•ฅ๐• ๐•ก ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•ค๐•ก๐•’๐•ž๐•ž๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜ ๐•’๐•Ÿ๐•• ๐•”๐• ๐•ก๐•ช๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜ ๐•’๐•Ÿ๐•• ๐•ก๐•’๐•ค๐•ฅ๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•˜. ๐”พ๐• ๐••, ๐•€ ๐•ค๐•จ๐•–๐•’๐•ฃ ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•˜๐•ฆ๐•ช๐•ค ๐•’๐•ฃ๐•– ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•จ๐• ๐•ฃ๐•ค๐•ฅ ๐•ก๐•’๐•ฃ๐•ฅ ๐• ๐•— ๐•ฅ๐•จ๐•š๐•ฅ๐•”๐•™. โ„‚๐• ๐•ฆ๐•๐••๐•Ÿ'๐•ฅ ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ ๐•›๐•ฆ๐•ค๐•ฅ ๐•ฅ๐•ฃ๐•ช ๐•ฅ๐•  ๐•“๐•– ๐•ž๐•’๐•ฅ๐•ฆ๐•ฃ๐•– ๐•—๐• ๐•ฃ ๐• ๐•Ÿ๐•”๐•– ๐•š๐•Ÿ ๐•ช๐• ๐•ฆ๐•ฃ ๐•๐•š๐•—๐•–?
twitch chat
February 2018
MOONMOON

Moderators you have no right to ban me

twitchquotes: Dear moderators. You have no right to ban me or remove my messages. Do you even know who my father is? He is a very powerful and rich man. I strongly advise you not to mess with me or consequences will be met in court. I hope you understand all the seriousness of the situation. Have a good day.
twitch chat
September 2019

MODS

Tell us what's in the sandwich

twitchquotes: ฬฟ ฬฟ'ฬฟ'ฬตะท=เผผ โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ–€ฬฟ ฬฟ เผฝ=ฮต/ฬต/โ€™ฬฟโ€™ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ[} ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ^ tell us what's in the sandwich and nobody gets hurt kripp ฬฟ ฬฟ'ฬฟ'ฬตะท=เผผ โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ–€ฬฟ ฬฟ เผฝ=ฮต/ฬต/โ€™ฬฟโ€™ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ[} ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ ฬฟ^
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing