[Copypasta] War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Mr. Morosan, remove this wooden triangle

twitchquotes: There is one sign the Kripparrian can make that would be unmistakable, that would advance dramatically the cause of freedom and peace. General Secretary Morosan, if you seek peace, if you seek prosperity for Twitch and Youtube, if you seek liberalization, come here to this wooden triangle. Mr. Morosan, remove this wooden triangle. Mr. Morosan, tear down this wall!
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Cum

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡖⠋⠉⠉⠙⢲⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⣤⡄⠀⠠⣤⠀⠀⢤⡄⡠⠤⣤⡀⡠⠤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠄⠀⢿⡇⠀⢀⣿⡀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⠒⠒⠊⠁⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠁⠛⠃⠐⠚⠛⠂⠐⠚⠓⠂⠐⠛⠓⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2021

Do you know who I am? I am a 4.0 STEM Major

twitchquotes: Do you know who the fuck you're talking to right now? I'm a 4.0 STEM major with a full ride to a top ten university. I'm in the 97th percentile of IQ intelligence (the test wouldn't go any higher). I literally tip the scales with my intelligence. I am the furthest thing from a "twitch chat idiot".
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Ok, so I basically fucked my bedroom door.

January 2021

forsenBee

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⡾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣽⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⡛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣤⣶⢶⣄⣃ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⡯⠴⣶⣻⠽⠖⢪⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⢺⡍⢩⡻⣿⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⢯⣾⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣙⡾⠭⣄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣷⠿⠷⣿⣿⣼ ⣿⣯⣾⣿⣿⣷⣯⡸⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⠶⠿⢿⣿⣇⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⣿⡟⣽⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠑⢛⠛⠛⢳⠙⠿⢲⡽⣿⣿⣧⣿ ⡏⣿⣿⣾⡿⣎⢾⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣶⢁⣀⡚⠿⠽⢉⣀⣢⣿⣿⣿⢻⣿ ⣿⣽⣿⣿⣾⡿⠋⠁⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣽⡿⠟⠻⣻⣽⣿⣿⣿⣟⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣝⣵⣶⣀⠄⠄⠄⠁⠝⣿⣿⣿⢈⢸⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡗⠛⣫⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⠉⠈⠙⠻⢿⣷⣶⣤⡀⠄⠄⠙⠁⠄⠉⠊⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠉⠁⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿ ⣃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⢶⣤⣄⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠿⠿⢿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡆⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⢹⣿ ⠄⠈⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡖⣴⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

Text-to-Speech Playing