[Copypasta] War Thunder is like playing chess

It's not that the game is addicting, it's just that there are no decent alternatives. War Thunder is basically the intellectual version of the FPS games that all the stupid children and mongoloid brains play. Instead of just being based purely on twitch "skills" which require as much intellectual ability as closing popup spam windows, in War Thunder you have to use at least some tactics and strategy. FPS games are like playing Pong on high speed. War Thunder is like playing chess. The art of gaming is simply dead for big brains. 20 years ago there were tons of games that required brainpower because PC gaming back then was by nerds and for nerds, but then the corporate suits took over and were like "broaden the appeal to we can make more sales" so everything got dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. My GF asked me if I was "having fun" playing War Thunder, and I looked at her like she was a fucking retard to even consider that sentence a valid question. I don't have FUN playing War Thunder. This game routinely pisses me off and makes me rage. However, when I stomp the entire enemy team and crush them so utterly I can hear the lamentations of their mothers, I feel satisfaction. I spent weeks grinding for Operation Winter. The vikings had a word for this. They called it Valhalla. Endless war. Endless combat. Knowing only victory and death. Bathing in the blood of your enemies. You get 15 kills and bask in glory and rewards, and think: what should I do now? Should I get in my Honda Fit and tour the local strip mall for my Triumph? Should I microwave some tendies and throw myself a great Feast? But there is only one option. There is only ever one option. To Battle! Various cultures have alternatively described the gameplay loop of War Thunder as their vision of Heaven or Hell. It is both.
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

BRUH anime girl

⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠉⠉⠉⠹ ⡇⢸⣿⡟⠛⢿⣷⠀⢸⣿⡟⠛⢿⣷⡄⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⣧⣤⣾⠿⠀⢸⣿⣇⣀⣸⡿⠃⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣇⣀⣸⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⡏⠉⢹⣿⡆⢸⣿⡟⠛⢻⣷⡄⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⡏⠉⢹⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⣧⣤⣼⡿⠃⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠸⣿⣧⣤⣼⡿⠁⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀ ⣇⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣀⡈⠉⣁⣀⣄⣀⣀⣀⣠⣀⣀⣀⣰ ⣇⣿⠘⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⣟⣟⢟⢟⢝⠵⡝⣿⡿⢂⣼⣿⣷⣌⠩⡫⡻⣝⠹⢿⣿⣷ ⡆⣿⣆⠱⣝⡵⣝⢅⠙⣿⢕⢕⢕⢕⢝⣥⢒⠅⣿⣿⣿⡿⣳⣌⠪⡪⣡⢑⢝⣇ ⡆⣿⣿⣦⠹⣳⣳⣕⢅⠈⢗⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢈⢆⠟⠋⠉⠁⠉⠉⠁⠈⠼⢐⢕⢽ ⡗⢰⣶⣶⣦⣝⢝⢕⢕⠅⡆⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⣴⠏⣠⡶⠛⡉⡉⡛⢶⣦⡀⠐⣕⢕ ⡝⡄⢻⢟⣿⣿⣷⣕⣕⣅⣿⣔⣕⣵⣵⣿⣿⢠⣿⢠⣮⡈⣌⠨⠅⠹⣷⡀⢱⢕ ⡝⡵⠟⠈⢀⣀⣀⡀⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⢈⡋⠴⢿⡟⣡⡇⣿⡇⡀⢕ ⡝⠁⣠⣾⠟⡉⡉⡉⠻⣦⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣦⣥⣿⡇⡿⣰⢗⢄ ⠁⢰⣿⡏⣴⣌⠈⣌⠡⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣬⣉⣉⣁⣄⢖⢕⢕⢕ ⡀⢻⣿⡇⢙⠁⠴⢿⡟⣡⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣵⣵⣿ ⡻⣄⣻⣿⣌⠘⢿⣷⣥⣿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⢄⠻⣿⣟⠿⠦⠍⠉⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣦⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟ ⡕⡑⣑⣈⣻⢗⢟⢞⢝⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⠿⠃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣠ ⡝⡵⡈⢟⢕⢕⢕⢕⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⣀⣈⠙ ⡝⡵⡕⡀⠑⠳⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⢉⡠⡲⡫⡪⡪⡣
March 2021

Weebs

OOOOAAAAHH

twitchquotes: ᕙ( ^ₒ^ c) 〇〇〇〇ᗩᗩᗩᗩᕼᕼ ᕙ( ^ₒ^ c)
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

I am a silent guardian, I am the Dark Knight

twitchquotes: ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴜᴘᴏɴ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡᴀs ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴋɪᴅ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ, ᴡʜᴏ ʜᴏᴘᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴɢ's ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ. ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʜɪᴍ "ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ, ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴋɪʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴀᴢɪ ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs". ᴛʜᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ ᴡɪᴇʟᴅᴇᴅ ʜɪs sᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴜᴛ ɪᴛ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴄʜᴇsᴛs. <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ "ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴀ sɪʟᴇɴᴛ ɢᴜᴀʀᴅɪᴀɴ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴋɴɪɢʜᴛ".
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Aspirations and dreams

twitchquotes: Press 1 if you once had aspirations and dreams but have now given up all hope and devolved into mindless shitposting.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

I know Pikachu dittos are pretty wild looking

twitchquotes: I know Pikachu dittos are pretty wild looking, but I'm hoping viewers watch w/ an open mind. Beneath what looks like Quick Attack spam is actually a lot of depth in the MU. Knowing when to press the B button is important. Pika dealing with his own height is intriguing too.
twitch chat
March 2019

Super Smash Bros

Text-to-Speech Playing