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More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Which one of you got reddit to send me this
Which one of you fucks got reddit to send me this shit
"Hi there,
A concerned redditor reached out to us about you.
When you're in the middle of something painful, it may feel like you don't have a lot of options."
Which one of you fucks got reddit to send me this shit
"Hi there,
A concerned redditor reached out to us about you.
When you're in the middle of something painful, it may feel like you don't have a lot of options."
Iām a simple guy
Iām a simple guy. I donāt know about all these fancy āfinancial instrumentsā or āmarket dynamicsā or āwhere the clit is.ā
I like the stock, I buy the stock.
Iām a simple guy. I donāt know about all these fancy āfinancial instrumentsā or āmarket dynamicsā or āwhere the clit is.ā
I like the stock, I buy the stock.
The Battle of Gamestop rages on.
The Battle of Gamestop rages on.
Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-manās land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen.
When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground weād lost in the past week.
As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds.
This war wonāt be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wifeās boyfriend to tell her I love her.
The Battle of Gamestop rages on.
Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-manās land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen.
When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground weād lost in the past week.
As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds.
This war wonāt be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wifeās boyfriend to tell her I love her.
GME revamp
GME should keep their retail stores but make it more of an experience like Hooters. Workers should be hot big tiddy goth girls or whatever other fetish gamers have. Bonuses if they have active social media (Instagram, Tik Tok, Only Fans, etc.) and extra bonus if they also stream on Twitch. 100% guaranteed increase traffic and sales in stores (simp farms). Literally cannot go tits up.
GME should keep their retail stores but make it more of an experience like Hooters. Workers should be hot big tiddy goth girls or whatever other fetish gamers have. Bonuses if they have active social media (Instagram, Tik Tok, Only Fans, etc.) and extra bonus if they also stream on Twitch. 100% guaranteed increase traffic and sales in stores (simp farms). Literally cannot go tits up.
Bears after a green day
Itās 4:01pm. Bears solemnly log out of their devastated brokerage account, get up from their makeshift desk made up of a stack of empty Michelinaās frozen lasagna dinners, head up the stairs of their fatherās basement, grab the keys to their tan ā97 Chevy Cavalier and a cloth mask embroidered with the word āVOTE,ā and drive down the street to the local gay bar for a holiday themed burlesque show.
Itās 4:01pm. Bears solemnly log out of their devastated brokerage account, get up from their makeshift desk made up of a stack of empty Michelinaās frozen lasagna dinners, head up the stairs of their fatherās basement, grab the keys to their tan ā97 Chevy Cavalier and a cloth mask embroidered with the word āVOTE,ā and drive down the street to the local gay bar for a holiday themed burlesque show.
