[Copypasta] Apology letter from the condom factory

twitchquotes: What in the actual rainbows is wrong with your brain? Did you IQ test return with negative results or something? I’m getting closer and closer to believing that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Jesus Christ. Love the content keep it up.
twitch chat
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022

not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

Canadian man brofisting the local Greek population

twitchquotes: Last night in Greece, Greek police heard reports of a Canadian man in a blue tacky sweater walking around the streets at night, 'brofisting' the local population. As a result 20,000 greek citizens have contracted the casualitis. If you see this man, please report to greek policerino department.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

You've been gnomed 2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⣀⢠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠙⢹⣿⣏⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡛⠛⢛⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠛⠿⠛⠻⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣽ ⣇⣀⠄⣀⡀⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⢿⠿⠟⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿
November 2018

Faceful Void

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄▄▄▀▀▀▀▀▄▄▄░░░░░░ ░▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▀▄▄░░ ▄▀░░░░▀▀▄░░░░▄▀░░░▀▄░ ▌░░░░░▄▄▄░░▄░▄▄░░░▄▀░ ▐░░░░▀▐▌░░▒▐░▐▌▀░░█░░ ░▀▀▄▄░░░░░▀▀░░░▄▄▀▄░░ ░▄▀░█▀▄░▄▀█▀▀▄▐▄▄▄░▌░ ▐▌▄▀░░▐▐▀█▀█▀▌▌░░▐░▐░ ░▌▐▌░░░▌▀▀▀▀▀▐░░░▄▌▐▀ ░▐▄▀░░▐█▀▀▀▀██░▀▄▀▀▀░ ░░░░░░█▌░░░░█▌░▀░░░░░ ░░░░░▐█░░░░▐█░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▀▀░░░░░░▀▀░░░░░░░
June 2015

Dota 2

Text-to-Speech Playing