[Copypasta] you will never be on my intellectual level

twitchquotes: listen until you guys have read fichte, kant, schelling, hegel, goethe, novalis and hamann in the original german, you will never be on my intellectual level, you are plebs who are addicted to reddit and think rick and morty is a deep show, your children will be dysgenic losers and mine will be serious winners and well-educated, they'll probably smack the glasses off your children for fun and then go read homer in the original greek.
twitch chat
August 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Infinite Cum Part 2

Your eyes slowly open. Crusty from months of wear from stray globs of semen and cosmic dust. You are in a room and you can no longer see your member, or rather, what was left of it. There are tubes leading away from your pelvis, pumping and pulsating. There is a glass window across from you and a person dressed in a white jacket. A woman. She looks up from her clipboard to see you are awake. At first she is uninterested, but then her eyes slam open and a beaming smile crosses her face. Her eyes filled with curiosity. “You’re awake!” She cries over the loudspeakers that you only just now notice embedded into the top corners of the room. “Where am I?” You ask, filled with fear and excitement. You thought you would never see a human again and you would be destined to suffer endlessly across the cosmos. “You are on Saturn. You crashed into it and due to it’s extreme mass you were able to stop. We picked you up because you may be the key to saving humanity for all eternity.” “How?” You ask as a smile begins to creep across your face, imagining that you could be an icon for humanity. “You have been addressed as the Cosmic Unknown Mass Semen Generator, or CUMS-G for short. The fault in reality that caused your affliction can be used for the good of humanity. By using the mass you produce we will never have to worry about energy again, as by converting your biomass into energy we have unlimited power for the rest of time. When the stars die and the cosmos sink into nothing, humanity will be able to continue thanks to you. The anomaly that created you is easily one of the greatest discoveries humanity has ever had, on par with the discovery of fire.” “Will I not die?” “You can’t die. You are immortal. You don’t even have a body and yet you continue to exist” … Hours later, she leaves to tell her superiors. They do not greet you. They exchange high-fives and party but they do not speak to you. Months pass. The cum accelerates. Then years. The cum accelerates. Then decades. The cum accelerates. Then centuries. The cum accelerates. Then eons. The cum accelerates. No one talks to you. You don’t even know if humanity is alive anymore or if they have left you to exist for the rest of eternity. The tubes around you have gotten far thicker and more high tech as the ferocity of your semen expulsion increased. Eventually the walls around you cave in. Only then do you see the truth. Their plan was flawed.
April 2022

Infinite Cum

Oh god I want xqc so bad

twitchquotes: Oh god I want xqc so bad 😩 💦 he's so smart 🤓 📚 and cute 😘 🙈 I would take him to my apartment and kiss him 👄 😘 lick him 👅 😛 and finger him 👉 👌 I would fuck him 🍆 💦 then I'd get him pregnant 🤰 👶 and we'd raise our own little baby 👨👨👦 👦 and play fortnite with him 🎮 ⌨️ xd
twitch chat
April 2019
xQcOW

Emoji Pasta

forsenSheffy

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡤⢲⠤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⢀⣞⣱⣜⣶⢱⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨ ⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣝⣿⣿⣷⣸⢰⣿⣷⡃⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾ ⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⠿⠿⢿⠿⡿⣿⣿⠅⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿ ⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣿⣥⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣶⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠾⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠠⠚⣉⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣢⣴⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⢰⣶⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⣷⣤⡄⣶⣿⣿⣁⠒⠤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⣮⣻⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⡟⢩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣦⣤⣤⠄⠄⠚⠈⠁⠘⣤⣀⣠⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⢈⣀⠄⠄⠄⢤⡙⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠰⠺⠁⠄⠄⢀⣀⣿⡤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣨⠉⠉⠄⣾⣿⣿⡗⠁⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer

twitchquotes: I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer. I’m a zoomer, not a Gen X’r. Born in the 21th century. I’m a zoomer, i’m yeething and sheeting and peeting and reating. I’m a zoomer, we use internet since we were born. Dancing like fortnight! I’m a zoomer, we don’t know 9/11. I’m a zoomer, we are the 9 year olds. I’m a zoomer!
twitch chat
November 2019

Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018
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