[Copypasta] This is my son Nestor

twitchquotes: For all those wondering, this is my son Nestor. We share no blood but he is my life. He came from Cuba (legally, of course) six years ago and lives with me in Florida. I am so proud of him and raising him has been the best, most rewarding thing I’ve done in my life.
twitch chat
June 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

What is a GOAT?

twitchquotes: The domestic goat or simply goat (Capra aegagrus hircus) is a subspecies of C. aegagrus domesticated from the wild goat of Southwest Asia and Eastern Europe.
twitch chat
February 2019

Overwatch

Intelligest response to "Who asked?"

What if somebody did ask, huh, what then? I'm sure they were quite satisfied with the answer. But you, no, you cannot for the life of you find a way to somehow think about what someone else thinks or feels. When you imply that nobody asked, you're talking solely about yourself. The world doesn't revolve around you. Try to find the simple joys of life instead of wasting perhaps the best years of your life away, sitting in your shit smeared, cheeto dust covered, cum bespeckled ergonomic office chair. Maybe start working out, think about somebody other than you, secure yourself a date, anything will work, so long as you get the fuck outside and stop asking "who asked" every 2 fucking minutes, because quite frankly nobody asked for your opinion as well. You're but a speck of extra stinky shit in a pile of manure, that's all the significance you have in this world, but you can change that with 4 simple words: Shutting the fuck up. Thank you and have a good day
November 2021

Who Asked?

Using the promo code TEMPO!

twitchquotes: reynadTS That RNG was ridiculous! But not as ridiculous as the savings you can get at G2A by using the promo code TEMPO! reynadTS
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

sellout

Hearthstone

FitnessGram Pacer Test

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
September 2016

Classic

So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing