[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Mother’s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming I’ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didn’t even answer (and he loves dessert)
twitch chat
May 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Our most powerful technique - Submode

twitchquotes: "You are Anakin no longer, but Darth Vader. Rise my young apprentince," says Palpatine to the new Darth Vader. "My master, can you teach me how to resurrect the dead through the force?" asks Vader. Trump smirks, "In time, my apprentice, but first you must learn our most powerful technique - Sub Mode."
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump

We wish you a Merry Krippmas

twitchquotes: ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas and a Salty New Year. Good top-deckings to you, whereever you are, Good top-deckings for Krippmas, and a Salty New Year. ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Party Parrot

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠿⢋⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡿⠋⠀⢾⣿⡆⢠⣾⡿⢿⣦⢸⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⣾⡏⠀⠈⣿⡇⠀⠹⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⢻⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣆⣰⣿⠃⠀⠀⣸⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠟⠀⠻⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⣾⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⣶⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀
November 2020

Flareon is better than Vaporeon for human companionship

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of human companionship, Flareon is objectively the most huggable Pokemon? While their maximum temperature is likely too much for most, they are capable of controlling it, so they can set themselves to the perfect temperature for you. Along with that, they have a lot of fluff, making them undeniably incredibly soft to touch. But that's not all, they have a very respectable special defense stat of 110, which means that they are likely very calm and resistant to emotional damage. Because of this, if you have a bad day, you can vent to it while hugging it, and it won't mind. It can make itself even more endearing with moves like Charm and Baby Doll Eyes, ensuring that you never have a prolonged bout of depression ever again.
March 2022

Pokemon

F*ck this guy, f*ck you too

twitchquotes: ↓ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵍᵘʸ↓ ↑ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒᵒ ↑
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad
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