[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Mother’s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming I’ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didn’t even answer (and he loves dessert)
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
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MOM I NEED V-BUCKS

twitchquotes: β—οΈβœ‹ OK MOM βœ‹β—οΈWE NEED TO TALK 😑😀 I NEED V-BUCKS πŸ˜œπŸ’΅ I'VE MADE STRAIGHT A'S 😎🀨 I'VE CLEANED MY ROOM 😫🀬 I'VE TAKEN OUT THE TRASH πŸ—‘οΈπŸ”« I CUT THE CATS ASSHOLE HAIR πŸ˜πŸ‘ NOW I NEED YOU πŸ§πŸ‘‰ TO BUY ME V-BUCKS 😎πŸ”₯ I'VE GOTTA SHOW 🀯🀬 MY CLOUT ON FORTNITE πŸ”₯πŸ˜ŽπŸ’― NOW I'LL BE IN BED πŸ˜΄πŸ’€ BY NINE BECAUSE IT'S A SCHOOL NIGHT πŸ˜”πŸ“šπŸšΈ
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

TL aka Laughingstock

twitchquotes: TL, aka "Total Laughingstock," is a team that plays for Riot Games' Minor League that is often ridiculed for its disappointing international performances. It is specifically known for fielding expensive lineups to be dumpstered by Native Eu Talent.
twitch chat
August 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

Ghiaccio: You know Paris, France?

You know Paris, France? In English, it's pronounced "Paris" but everyone else pronounces it without the "s" sound, like the French do. But with Venezia, everyone pronouces it the English way: "Venice". Like 'The Merchant of Venice' or 'Death in Venice'. WHY, THOUGH!? WHY ISN'T THE TITLE DEATH IN VENEZIA!? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? IT TAKES PLACE IN ITALY, SO USE THE ITALIAN WORD, DAMMIT! THAT SHIT PISSES ME OFF! BUNCH OF DUMBASSES!
January 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020

Dunning-Kruger effect

twitchquotes: The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias wherein unskilled individuals suffer from illusory superiority, mistakenly assessing their ability to be much higher than is accurate. This bias is attributed to a metacognitive inability of the unskilled to recognize their ineptitude.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
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