[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Mother’s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming I’ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didn’t even answer (and he loves dessert)
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
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My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019

Al Pacino's dongarino sweat is tastarino

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp! It's me, FrankerZ (from the pizzarino place). I'm back from my 600 second ban. I still have your faggarino pizzarino if you want it. Al Pacino's dongarino sweat dried up but it is still tastarino. Give me a call my number is 867-5309. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino frappuccino mochaccino pistachio. Your friend- FrankerZ (from the pizzarino place).
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Is this chat filled with parrots?

twitchquotes: Is this chat filled with parrots? All you guys do is copy what the person above you wrote. Please have some originality and contribute to a smarter chat.
twitch chat
August 2014

I hate Twitch Chat

Jack Ma goes missing

Jack Ma is making poop emoji pillows in a factory now 11 hours a day and you guys are making jokes about him 😔
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Ahoy Kripp, ya landlubber

twitchquotes: ୧༼ °͠_▀̿ ༽? Ahoy Kripp, ya landlubber. We request a swashbuckling pirate deck, else ye be walkin the plank. ୧༼ °͠_▀̿ ༽?
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ riot ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨

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