[Copypasta] Leave the competition to the the competitors

twitchquotes: WHY in the FUCK do you PLEBS roll in here and think you can backseat game the GREAT [insert streamer name]. He is a god who floats in your sea of wrong on his ship of right. His plays are FLAWLESS and every loss he takes is pure, unadultared, rng, bullshit. Get your tiny minds out of here and go watch something more casual!! Leave the competition to the the competitors. [insert streamer name] god has essential work to do.
twitch chat
April 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Nesquik cereal box

April 2021

NSFW

I use Linux as my operating system

"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux." The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long." With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
June 2021

Troll face 5

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣛⣛⠛⠒⠲⠶⠦⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠏⠁⠀⠀⢀⣤⠶⣛⣩⣥⠤⠤⠤⠤⢤⣤⣤⣭⣭⣉⣉⣛⣛⣻⣭⣥⠬⡍⠛⢶⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⠃⠀⠀⣠⡶⢋⡵⢛⡩⠵⠒⠒⠒⠒⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⠤⠤⠤⢤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠃⠀⠀⠘⢁⡴⢋⣴⢿⠒⠈⠉⣏⠉⠐⠒⡾⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠀⠀⢀⣀⣈⣙⣆⡀⠀⠀⢹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠟⣁⠀⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⡀⠘⠀⢈⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⣇⠖⠉⠙⠅⠀⠀⠉⠉⠑⢦⡈⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⢿⣧⠤⠤⠤⠄⠀⠖⣿⠀⠃⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⠀⠐⠁⢸⡇⠀⣀⣰⠉⠠⠀⠀⣰⣶⣷⣶⠀⠀⠀⢱⡈⢻⣦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⡿⣱⠋⢀⣴⠶⠚⠻⢶⣤⡘⢧⣄⠆⠂⠀⡉⠉⣉⣀⣀⠉⣠⡟⠁⠀⠉⢻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠟⠛⠀⠀⢈⡿⢍⢢⢹⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⠁⡇⢠⣿⠁⠀⢰⣦⡀⠉⠉⠀⠈⠙⠲⠾⠾⠶⠶⠶⠚⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣯⡑⠢⢤⣀⣂⣀⣨⠤⠒⠛⠃⠘⡆⡇⡧⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⡇⢸⡇⢠⣴⣾⠋⠛⢷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠴⢠⠶⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣷⠀⠀⡼⢡⢣⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⣧⠘⠿⠀⠀⠸⣧⡀⠀⠈⢻⡿⢶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠸⣆⠐⠟⠻⠷⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠃⠑⠤⠀⢀⣼⣿⡇⢀⠤⢂⣾⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣌⠑⠦⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣷⣤⣸⣷⡀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣠⡴⣿⠉⣿⣿⠀⠀⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⣼⠁⠀⠈⠉⠙⣿⠛⠛⠻⢿⠿⠛⠛⢻⡇⠀⢸⡀⣹⣿⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣄⣀⣿⣄⣀⣀⣸⣄⣀⣠⣴⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⡄⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠘⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢷⣄⠘⢷⡀⠘⡟⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣧⡀⠻⣾⡃⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣄⠈⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣹⠇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣷⣄⠈⠛⠷⣼⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⡿⠀⢸⠇⣘⣧⠟⠀⢀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢷⣄⡀⠀⠙⠻⠷⠶⣶⣾⣿⣤⣀⣠⣿⣄⣀⣴⠷⠶⠿⠿⠟⠋⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣶⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⡤⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
May 2021

WTF IS MEGALUL?

twitchquotes: We have the perfect three letter emote for a british man laughing at your inferior memes. However, we had to take it one step further with this perverted version of the LUL emote and now my chat experience has been completed destroyed. All I wanted was a chat where I could LUL at the 4Head fags but now MEGALUL has destroyed the balance of emotes and chat will never be great again.
twitch chat
August 2016
Forsen

I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much

I was only 14 years old I loved xQc so much, I had all the merchandise and VODS. I pray to xQc every night, thanking him for the life I've been given. "xQc is love" I say "xQc is life" My dad hears me and calls me a Juicer. I knew he was jealous of my devotion to xQc. I called him baj He hits me and sends me to sleep I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed, really cold. I feel something warm... Its xQc! I was so happy. He whispers in my ear "This is my jungle" He grabs me with his hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my ass cheeks for xQc. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for xQc. I can feel my butt tearing and eyes watering. I want to please xQc. He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with the juice. My dad walks in. xQc looks him straight in the eye and says, He got the Juice now. xQc leaves through my window. xQc is love. xQc is life.
January 2022
xQcOW
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