[Copypasta] Every time I see Tifa punch someone I get a little sadder

twitchquotes: Every time I see Tifa punch someone I get a little sadder, because tha tis one less punch that could have been directed at my nutsack. I pray at night for Tifa to break into my house and mercilessly beat the everloving fuck out of my balls. I will pray extra hard tonight.
twitch chat
April 2020
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My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

Years of research

twitchquotes: Yeah, I’m a smash player. Along with that I know many things that most don’t know about these communities. Melee isn’t part of the actual smash community and I’m not saying that because I don’t like them. I’m saying that based off of years of research.
twitch chat
January 2019

Classic

Super Smash Bros

I think about Kripp when I touch my wiener

twitchquotes: ヽ( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)οΎ‰ Roses are red, Weed is greener, I think about Kripp, when I touch my wiener. ヽ( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)οΎ‰
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Joe Biden eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: He lets out a sigh and then a plastic smile. β€œUnder the Biden administration,” he says, carefully β€œThere will be a few new rules. It will be forbidden to cook,” The crowd gasps. β€œEveryone will have to eat McDonalds,” Jill hangs her head in shame. β€œYou may have to charge your phone. You may have to twerk. Hell, you may even have to be bisexual.” An uproar starts in the crowd, but Biden ushers a silence with his next words β€œBut it will all be worth it when we as a people can eat hot chip and lie. Thank you.” Biden leaves the podium to a thunderous applause. America is saved.
twitch chat
November 2020

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you πŸ‘‰πŸΏ ever 😠 had a dreams πŸ˜΄πŸ’­- thats βœ”- that you πŸ‘‰πŸ»πŸ‘€ uhm 😀 you πŸ‘ˆ had you πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ˆ could- you πŸ‘ˆ do what you πŸ‘‰ want 😍- you πŸ‘ˆ could do- so you πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘¦- you πŸ‘ˆ do- you πŸ‘ˆ could do you πŸ€–πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ wan πŸ”‘- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ want πŸ˜‹ him πŸ‘΄ to do so much πŸ”₯ that you πŸ‘‰ could do anything πŸ’°?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

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