[Copypasta] 69 is so funny

twitchquotes: 69 is so funny. Whenever I hear it, I just burst out laughing. I run out into the living room and grab the Tv remote. I start flicking through the channels. “You guys, it’s so funny, you’ll laugh so hard!” I can barely get it out as I’m laughing so hard, banging the table and snickering while I flick through the TV channels. I finally get to The CW, and the number 69 is on the bottom right-hand corner of the screen! My family and friends who were over all stand up in tremendous applause, and my wife and children come back from upstate to be with my comedic genius!
twitch chat
April 2020
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Stop calling slabs "half-slabs," you fucking imbeciles.

Stop calling slabs "half-slabs," you fucking imbeciles. A slab is half a block. If you say "half-slab," you're literally saying "half half block," or in other words, "quarter-block." A slab is not a quarter of a block. It is a half of a block. There is no such thing as a quarter block.
August 2021

Minecraft

Joe Rogan is obsessed with cooking meat over fire

I have become obsessed with cooking meat over fire. I get prepared for it. I make sure I'm hungry before I cook it. The smell of the smoke and the aroma of the crackling meat ignites some ancient genetic memories. It makes cooking and eating significantly better.
January 2022

Joe Rogan

BRUH

⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠉⠉⠉⠹ ⡇⢸⣿⡟⠛⢿⣷⠀⢸⣿⡟⠛⢿⣷⡄⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⣧⣤⣾⠿⠀⢸⣿⣇⣀⣸⡿⠃⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣇⣀⣸⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⡏⠉⢹⣿⡆⢸⣿⡟⠛⢻⣷⡄⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⡏⠉⢹⣿⡇⠀ ⡇⢸⣿⣧⣤⣼⡿⠃⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠸⣿⣧⣤⣼⡿⠁⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀ ⣇⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣀⡈⠉⣁⣀⣄⣀⣀⣀⣠⣀⣀⣀⣰
ascii art
October 2020

Domino's Pizza and Hatsune Miku

Hello everyone. I'm Scott, President of Domino's Pizza. Have you heard of Hatsune Miku? Today I'd like to announce a new collaborative project featuring Hatsune Miku: Domino's App, featuring Hatsune Miku. Hatsune Miku exists in a software called Vocaloid. Vocaloid enables you to produce songs. A character called Hatsune Miku sings the songs you create. A great feature is you can create songs as you like. I knew our talented Domino's Pizza crew could work together and create great Vocaloid songs. Bokuro P, Eshi, Chiyo Kiyoshi, Furitsu Keshi, everyone! Amazing Vocaloid songs have been created with the fantastic imagination of the crews all over Japan. The challenge was successfully carried out and this new collaborative app was produced. D O M I N O S P I Z Z A Based on Miku's image, the Domino's App changes its appearance. A lot of music and illustrations produced by Domino's crew are here. From the menu to the order, it looks very cute, just like Miku. Once your pizza's delivered, have some fun with Miku! It comes with a social camera function and you can take various poses, pictures of Miku, very cool. And last, but not least, the live performance! Start the pizza stage live and point the camera towards the pizza box, and the pizza box will turn into a live dancing venue. A live performance of Luv4Night produced by Domino's crew! Here we go! D O M I N O S P I Z Z A Let's enjoy the rest of the performance with the app!
January 2022

Weebs

A chef explaining why air fryers are a scam on r/unpopularopinion

As a chef, it’s an insult to hear “air fryers are as good as frying”. Air fryers are fucking bullshit scams and are just convection ovens with an extra fan added. Seriously, pan searing or regular baking will always be better. I swear to shit Jared if I hear you compare fried chicken to air fried chicken one more time I’m gonna smack the gob out of you. Edit: I’m in danger, I never realized how deep the air fryer fandom goes. I will die on this hill Edit2: I’ll never stop upvoting and loving you all but… but I’m just gonna go cry about something totally different.. Edit3: i think id be a lot less upset if it was called an “extra air oven” as its a convection oven with extra fans. Edit4: if I had a dollar for every comment “you clearly don’t own an air fryer” I’d be able to put it towards a new toaster oven. Edit5: the chances of getting doxxed over kitchen appliances isn’t high.. but never zero. Edit6: apparently air fryers are taking my job? Sorry boys and girls, no more foi gras for the rich.
November 2021
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