[Copypasta] Jack and Jill went up the hill

twitchquotes: Jack and Jill went up the hillšŸ—»šŸž So Jack could lick her candy šŸ­šŸ¬ šŸ…±ļøut Jack got a shockšŸ˜³šŸ™ŒšŸ’Æ And a mouthful of cockšŸ‘„šŸ’¦šŸ† Cause Jillā€™s real name is RšŸ…°ļøndy šŸ˜ˆ
twitch chat
March 2020
I used to be a real ad
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No, youā€™re NOT a real gamer.

No, youā€™re NOT a real gamer. Iā€™m so sick of all these people that think theyā€™re gamers. No, youā€™re not. Most of you are not even close to being gamers. I see these people saying ā€œI put well over 100 hours in this game, itā€™s great!ā€ thatā€™s nothing, most of us can easily put 300+ hours in all our games. I see people who only have a Nintendo Switch and claim to be gamers. Come talk to me when you pick up a PS4 controller then we be friends. Also DEAR ALL WOMEN: PokĆ©mon is not a real game. Animal Crossing is not a real game. The Sims is not a real game. Mario is not a real game. Stardew valley is not a real game. Mobile games are NOT.REAL.GAMES. put down the baby games and play something that requires challenge and skill for once. Sincerely, all of the ACTUAL gamers.
June 2021

Anduin and Uther

twitchquotes: Anduin is standing outside, looking through the window. He sees how Ben Brode SCAMAZes Tyrande. A small tear runs down his face. "Since Tyrande is the new Priest hero, nobody will ever fulfill my wishes and desires..." A muscular hand lays down on Anduin's shoulder. He turns around and gasps. It's Uther, the Lightbringer himself. "Don't worry, I will make sure you will get my Blessing of Might". Anduin's sorrow immediatly vanishes as he is about to receive his blessing. Uther smirks and reveals his 5/3 Assbringer. "Wow..." Anduin says. Uther slams his Assbringer into Anduin's 1/1 Lightspawn. "Well Played" Uther yells as he Consecrates all over Anduin's face. "BY THE HOLY LIGHT!"
twitch chat
October 2016

Hearthstone

Why not just play melee?

twitchquotes: I find it so weird that the smash4 crowd is so hype that ultimate "moves more like melee" Like if youre so torqued about melee movement why not just.. play melee? The game is already out, doesn't require a 300$ console, is likely a better game, and doesn't have an expiration date
twitch chat
December 2018

Super Smash Bros

Mr I'm too dank to call or write my fans

twitchquotes: dear mr im too dank to call or write my fans. this is the last meme ill ever send your ass. its been 6 months and still no accept. i dont deserve it? i know you got my last two friend requests i wrote the memes on em perfect. i love you cutie, we culdve been together think about it
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Wow! I love Verizonā„¢!

twitchquotes: Wow! I love Verizonā„¢! Iā€™m glad that the internet is so free! Isnā€™t it great to say whatever you want and have your opinion represented equally across the internet! Itā€™s really great! Good thing Verizon has spent millions on having that removed Iā€™m sure they wonā€™t abuse it! Thank you Verizonā„¢! I love Verizonā„¢! Donā€™t you love Verizonā„¢?! Say it! Say it! Say you love Verizonā„¢! Canā€™t you see theyā€™re protecting us from all those small businesses who want to steal a fraction of their market?! Donā€™t you hate those people disagreeing with you?! I sure love Verizonā„¢! Thank you Verizonā„¢! Thank you for sticking your gold plated rusty knives up our asses and looking us dead in the eyes and saying ā€œthis is whatā€™s best for a free and open internetā€ and slowly twisting it deeper and deeper until we eventually just give out and shit money into your fat wallets!
twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

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