twitchquotes:
copypasta is dumb (dont copy this message. i know its tempting, and i know you might think it'll be funny, but in reality, it's not)
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(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Mad Bomber Diary
twitchquotes:
Mad Bomber Diary 11/11/14: Dear Diary, Kripp has played me 200th time today, he always keeps me for his greediest plays like I'm one of his prosterinos. I shall take this torment no more, I demand that he coins me out on an empty board like an honest minion from now on. Pls no copy pasterino my story
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Kripp
Response to "go fuck yourself"
What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
Classic
Here in my garage
twitchquotes:
Here in my garage, just bought this new Lamborghini here. Itβs fun to drive up here in the Hollywood hills. But you know what I like more than materialistic things? Knowledge. In fact, Iβm a lot more proud of these seven new bookshelves that I had to get installed to hold two thousand new books that I bought. Itβs like the billionaire Warren Buffett says, βthe more you learn, the more you earn.β
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The D: emote has been banned
twitchquotes:
ββββββββββββββββββββββββ 
The D: emote has been banned from this channel ββββββββββββββββββββββββ
The D: emote has been banned from this channel ββββββββββββββββββββββββ
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Commonwealth of Veganism
twitchquotes:
We have claimed, for Electoral Vote purposes, the Commonwealth of Veganism (which wonβt allow legal meat eaters) the State of Twitch, and the State of Kripparian, each one of which has a BIG Vegan lead. Additionally, we hereby claim the State of Lettuce if, in fact, there was a large number of secretly dumped carrots as has been widely reported!
twitch chat
Kripp