[Copypasta] Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

I used to be a real ad
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does anyone have that sneaky copy pasta

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POLICE VOLIBEAR

twitchquotes: HotPokket HELLO RIOT? โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket MAE HERE โ˜Ž๏ธ POLICE VOLIBEAR SELECTED โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket IM TRIGGERED โ˜Ž๏ธ HotPokket
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The Feed Lord is here

twitchquotes: Michael "Imaqtpie" Santana slowly stroked his beard. There was only one thing on his mind. "I have a need..." he smirked. "A need to feed." His hand moved from his beard to his mouse. He locked in kog maw with a grin. "The Feed Lord is here."
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Text-to-Speech Playing