[Copypasta] This guy's pasta is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's pasta is CRAZY!” ☑ “My rigatoni can't win against a linguini like that” ☑ "He NEEDED that alfredo to win" ☑ “He meatballed the only marinara that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect fettucini ☑ “There was nothing I could cook” ☑ “I cooked that al dente”
twitch chat
August 2014
I used to be a real ad
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Angry Wojak / Soyjak comment

⠀⠀⠘⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠑⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠴⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠤⠄⠒⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣀⠄⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠔⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠢⠤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⢠⠂⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢤⡀⢂⠀⢨⠀⢀⡠⠈⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⡖⠒⠶⠤⠭⢽⣟⣗⠲⠖⠺⣖⣴⣆⡤⠤⠤⠼⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡈⠃⠀⠀⠀⠘⣺⡟⢻⠻⡆⠀⡏⠀⡸⣿⢿⢞⠄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⡀⠤⡀⡀⡔⠉⣏⡿⠛⠓⠊⠁⠀⢎⠛⡗⡗⢳⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⠀⠨⡇⠃⠀⢻⠁⡔⢡⠒⢀⠀⠀⡅⢹⣿⢨⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠠⢼⠀⠀⡎⡜⠒⢀⠭⡖⡤⢭⣱⢸⢙⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠸⢁⡀⠿⠈⠂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡍⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⢢⣫⢀⠘⣿⣿⡿⠏⣼⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⠊⠀⣀⠎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⢴⡦⡴⢶⣞⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠐⠒⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⢀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
March 2021

Response to someone correcting spelling

whats that? holy shit. holy fucking shit. you fucking genius. did you actually just correct someone's spelling? you fucking madlad. i can't believe i just witnessed one of the greatest achievements in human history right now. i think im gonna cry, im so excited. to be honest, i would suck your dick to reward you for your HUGE contribution to the human race if the line wasnt so long. you know what? fuck it. ill let you fuck my wife. ill pay you to fuck her. only for the slim chance that one of her kids will have a small part of your magnificent iq. ill mortgage my fucking house just so you could have 15 minutes with her, while hoping that your MASSIVE cock won't rip her in half. after that, we should start a religion for you. fuck jesus, the only thing this dick did is resurrect himself. you are entitled to the praise he's getting. we should make you immortal. losing you would mean stopping the human evolution and we would all revert to monkeys, not that we are more than monkeys in your majestic presence. I suggest we go to the UN and tell them to hand over all their authority to you, im sure you can unite all the people of the world just with a single swing of your cock, making the entire population wet in the process. just before that one more thing: can you shut the fuck up? nobody cares about that fucking typo you single chromosomed retarded gnome. I bet you think you are so fucking smart and witty after pointing something that didnt bother anyone. God, you are fucking pretentious, i bet you actually believed all of the text above. Did you think i would let you fuck my wife? She is only 12 you sick paedophile. Im calling the police so you could be tortured for eternity while your remains will be forcibly fed to everybody from your family or anyone even remotely related to you while they are forced to anally fuck a penguin. no, seriously do you think i'm joking? i'll come to your house and fuck your ass with a cactus. not that you would feel it after all the things you already had up there. you're a fucking twat that doesnt contribute to society and you deserve to die slowly.
October 2021

Padoru

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⡠⢲⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠔⣈⣀⠄⢔⡒⠳⡴⠊⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄ ⠄⢜⡴⢑⠖⠊⢐⣤⠞⣩⡇⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠝⠛⠋⠐ ⢸⠏⣷⠈⠄⣱⠃⠄⢠⠃⠐⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠸⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠈⣅⠞⢁⣿⢸⠘⡄⡆⠄⠄⠈⠢⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⡀⠄⠡⢀⠄⣀ ⠄⠙⡎⣹⢸⠄⠆⢘⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⠈⠢⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠑⢿⠈⢆⠘⢼⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⢐⢾⠄⡘⡏⠲⠆⠠⣤⢤⢤⡤⠄⣖⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣴⣶⣿⣿⣣⣈⣢⣸⠄⠄⠄⠄⡾⣷⣾⣮⣤⡏⠁⠘⠊⢠⣷⣾⡛⡟⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠒⢽⠄⠄⠄⠄⡇⣿⣟⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣻⡿⡇⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠰⢼⠄⠄⠄⡄⠁⢻⣍⣯⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣻⠃⠈⡆⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠙⠿⠿⠛⣿⣶⣤⡇⠄⠄⢣⠄⠄⠈⠄⢠⠂⠄⠁⠄⡀⠄⠄⣀⠔⢁⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠢⣖⣶⣦⣤⣤⣬⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⡏⠠⢃⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⠿⠟⠛⡹⠉⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠠⠤⠤⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠑⠠⣤⣀⣀⣀⡘⣿⠿⠙⠻⡍⢀⡈⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠠⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠉⠄⠻⣿⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
December 2018

Soju Going 8th Checklist

GOING 8TH CHECKLIST: I already won the game ✔ This lobby’s playing for second ✔ This is my last loss ✔ I win out from here ✔ My board is too lit ✔ HP is fake ✔ I’m about to spike hard ✔ That’s a fake loss ✔ 20hp? That’s 3 lives ✔ This game is over ✔ We win out ✔
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

Reynad is inspiring

twitchquotes: Reynad, you have inspired me so much. Without you I would never have been able to come to terms with my genital warts and how they are natural. I am no longer ashamed of them and would like you to someday see them! Thank you.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
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