[Copypasta] I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer

twitchquotes: I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer. I’m a zoomer, not a Gen X’r. Born in the 21th century. I’m a zoomer, i’m yeething and sheeting and peeting and reating. I’m a zoomer, we use internet since we were born. Dancing like fortnight! I’m a zoomer, we don’t know 9/11. I’m a zoomer, we are the 9 year olds. I’m a zoomer!
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Apology letter from the condom factory

twitchquotes: What in the actual rainbows is wrong with your brain? Did you IQ test return with negative results or something? I’m getting closer and closer to believing that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Jesus Christ. Love the content keep it up.
twitch chat
December 2020

.future gens will sit down and listen to...

twitchquotes: people sit with their children, tell them memories about mario, zelda, half life , dark souls, god of war , silent hill, resident evil , metroid.....future gens will sit down and listen to tales of T-Posing, fortnite dances and frying pans in battle royal games....and teach their kids the carlton and listen to the back pack kid and his flossing song.....may god have mercy on us all...
twitch chat
November 2019

Grand Widow Faerlina needs a new succubus

twitchquotes: Ｈｉ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｉｔ＇ｓ Ｇｒａｎｄ Ｗｉｄｏｗ Ｆａｅｒｌｉｎａ． Ｉ ｎｅｅｄ ａ ｎｅｗ ｓｕｃｃｕｂｕｓ ｔｏ ｌｅａｄ ｍｙ ａｃｏｌｙｔｅｓ ａｎｄ Ｉ ｗａｓ ｗｏｎｄｅｒｉｎｇ ｉｆ Ｒａｎｉａ ｗｏｕｌｄ ｂｅ ｉｎｔｅｒｅｓｔｅｄ？ Ｉ ｈｅａｒｄ ｓｈｅ ｉｓ ａｎ ａｍａｚｉｎｇ ｓｕｃｃｕｂｕｓ． Ｔｈａｎｋｓ ｆｏｒ ａｓｋｉｎｇ！ Ｋｎｅｅｌｅｒｉｎｏ ｂｅｆｏｒｅ ｍｅ ｗｏｒｍｅｒｉｎｏ！
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Learn to spell you fucking idiot

It's 'forget' not 'forgor'. It's 'remember' not 'rember'. How many fucking times do I have to tell you this? Go to a fucking school and learn how to spell you dumbass. Seriously, these 'forgor' and 'rember' things are NOT funny and will make you look like a loser.
August 2021

I saw JPOW at the grocery store

I saw JPOW at the grocery store. I was buying a dozen eggs last night and the store was kind of slow since it was after dark. Some old boomer was in front of me and chatting away with the woman at the cash register. Everyone had masks on, but as soon as he spoke I recognized the voice. He was telling the lady how inflation is a good thing. She said how come inflation keeps going up but minimum wage never rises? He ignored her and pulls out a large sheet of $1 bills. He asks if she had scissors but she said no. He looked back at me and saw the eggs and said "You workout huh? Its good to stay healthy. I used to workout by lifting bales of hay after school in 1952. Eggs are a good source of energy, mind if I take one? " I shrugged and told him.go ahead. He opened my pack of eggs, takes one out, lowers his mask, just throws the whole thing in his mouth shell and all, puts his mask back up, and begins chewing loudly. As he's chewing he's crookedly folding and ripping a sheet of dollar bills handing them to the lady individually. While he's chewing he tells me it's a great time to buy bonds. I tell him I'm good. The store was short on change so he just pays the full dollar amount. He hands me a crooked bill that is almost ripped in half and says "thanks pal, in the future that single egg will be worth a dollar so we will call it even" Im heading to my car after and I see him and another boomer arguing. There was JPOW and he's arguing with a man built like a gnome wearing a poorly fit collared shirt. The little man spoke and I instantly knew it was Cramer. Cramer wanted JPOW to hurry up and stop hogging the best parking spot. JPOW tells Cramer that hes got his mask on inside out and upside down. They both start talking about inflation and then look deep into each other's eyes and start making out with their masks on. It was a pretty weird.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

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