[Copypasta] Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?

twitchquotes: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way. He just ran out of thyme. Here today, gone tomato. His wife is still upset, cheese still not over it. We never sausage a tragedy coming. Ashes to ashes, crust to crust. There’s just not mushroom for Italian chefs in today’s world. Want to know what the rough parts of Italy are called? The spaghetto. Don’t call yourself Italian if you weren’t baptized in marinara sauce. You are literally too stupid to insult.
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
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Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk. This is proven by the name "Alvin and the Chipmunks", as you can see, Alvin is separated from the chipmunks, suggesting that Alvin is an entirely different species, making him an "imposter" amongst the others. Also, in "The Chipettes", Brittney has the strongest resemblance to Alvin, so why is it not called "Brittney and the Chipettes". So all that proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk. Not to mention that Alvin wears red, and I'm not sure about you, but that seems awfully sus to me. In the video game "Among us", the color red is was the birth of the obnoxious catchphrase, "red sus", being that the color red in the game is a stereotype that they are the imposter. While that might be unrelated, keep in mind that Alvin wears red too, and he is also the imposter amongst the other chipmunks. So this proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk, or anything like that. Alvin is just a sussy amogus imposter.
October 2021

xqcM emote

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⠋⠉⠄⠉⠉⠙⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠓⠢⠄ ⣺⣿⣿⣿⡿⠗⠚⠛⠛⠲⠶⠤⠤⠤⠼⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⢀⠤⠶⠖⠺⠿⣶⣷ ⣿⣿⣿⣯⣤⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⣀⡰⠖⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠸⣉⠄⢀⣃⣠⣶⡾⠋ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣡⣶⣶⣿⡿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⠄⠄ ⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣁⠄⠄⠈⠛⠻⠿⠟⠋⠈⠄⣼⣥⠄⠄⠈⠋⠉⠉⣽⡿⠿⢛⠇⠄ ⣧⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⣀⣄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣠⣤⣾⠃⠄⠄ ⣶⣌⣚⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣫⣴⠆⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣌⣃⠈⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⣼⣿⡋⣾⡇⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢟⡛⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⡶⣮⡵⢟⡂⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣶⢂⣭⣭⣭⣴⣾⣿⣷⡝⣿⣿⠯⠭⠶⡽⢗⠿⠃⠄⠄⠄ ⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡇⠘⠓⠷⠾⠄⠗⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
May 2019
xQcOW

Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here. I finally see that you got your vegan bitch ass to work. Remember, you're forced by contract to show off this game in all its splendor. And not only I'm paying you with a fuckton of money, but you also might get your wife back soon enough. So you better start getting some kills and play decently, or you will have to say goodbye to your midget dog. Happy gaming.
twitch chat
June 2019
Kripp

sellout

Don't use the "F word" on the trade floor

Just heard an employee use the “F word” on the trade floor, and immediately fired them. Maybe other funds will tolerate that kind of language, but don’t you dare talk about Fundamentals here.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Kripp I am a young beautiful Korean girl

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴀ ʏᴏᴜɴɢ ʙᴇᴀᴜᴛɪғᴜʟ ᴋᴏʀᴇᴀɴ ɢɪʀʟ (>‿◠)✌ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ɢɪɢɢʟᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏsᴇʟғ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴏғ ʜᴏᴡ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀᴛ ɢᴀᴍᴇs ♡‿‿♡ ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴍᴇ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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