[Copypasta] BALDING not MALDING

twitchquotes: Look at all of these non-intellectuals in chat. They struggle so hard to spell simple words such as "bald". They always type "mald" in chat instead. The pure stupidity in chat makes me lose hair in a way in which my hairline recedes aka "BALDING" not "MALDING".
twitch chat
July 2019
I used to be a real ad
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My sister bet 100 dollars that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti

twitchquotes: My sister bet 100 dollars that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
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twitchquotes: It's EXAM WEEK 😀😀 and it's TIME ⏱⏱ to WHIP OUT 😯😯 your EDUCATION ERECTIONS πŸŽ’πŸ“šπŸ†πŸ† and FUCK THESE FINALS πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰. That's RIGHT, get READY to BOOTYCALL πŸ‘πŸ“ž your SLUTTY STUDY BUDDIES 😏😏 and HIT πŸ‘ŠπŸ‘Š the BOOKS πŸ“˜πŸ“—πŸ“™till your BRAIN 🧠🧠 is RUBBED RAW 😫😫 and your PEN πŸ–ŠπŸ–Šis DRY 😡😡. So let's put the CUM in CUMULATIVE πŸ’¦πŸ’¦ and do this THING πŸ™ŒπŸ™Œ. Send this to 11 of the SKANKIEST 🀀🀀 SCHOLARS you know or you will LITERALLY get F'D! 😱😱
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I’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS

twitchquotes: β€œI’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS. I’M SIMPLY ASKING MULTIPLE STRANGERS MANY TIMES TO SPEND $15 ON ME” LUL
twitch chat
May 2019
OverwatchLeague

I'm an elite smash pro

twitchquotes: Excuse me??? I'll have you know that I'm an elite smash pro in the smash ultimate leaderboards kid. I'm not gonna take any sort of disrespect from you, I've carved a name for myself in smash history bud. You're a nobody, Sakurai personally looks at all my matches to balance the game and I could get you shitty main nerfed to the floor if I fucking wanted to so watch your back you nobody.
twitch chat
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Super Smash Bros

Today is the day I copypasta

twitchquotes: (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΩ„Νœ Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡ I have been training since before I was born, and today is the day. Today is the day I spam. (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΩ„Νœ Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing