[Copypasta] Muffins the dog in love with cats

twitchquotes: I'm muffins! i'm a dog that is in LOVE with cats! That's right! I know it sounds crazy because floofy doogos aren't supposed to breed with sassy kitties but I grew up with them and have just never really wanted anything to o with other puppers. It just feels so good to be a big strong dog loving a slender and fragile kitty! I can't help myself! Their long tail seductively swishing effortlessly through the air... I'm getting too excited now! I need to go to the park! I'm going to go play now!
twitch chat
July 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The ultimate tool to win any argument you're in, works even if you're losing

That's a nice argument you have, but unfortunately, I had sexual intercourse with your mother, therefore rendering any point you make null.
May 2021

My kids were listening to Lil Nas X

My kids were listening to old town road by Lil Nas X and one of my kids asked me doesn’t he worship satan? Thinking face I said yes son sadly he does. I had to turn on No role modelz by J Cole to cheer him up My kids idolize someone better now! Thank you J Cole you’re a life saver!
April 2021

Imaqtpizzapie and Imaqtlasagne

twitchquotes: Hello Michael, this is you Italian cousin Imaqtpizzapie. I just wrote to inform you of the birth of your new godson Imaqtlasagne. That's correct you are the godfather. Pls no copy pasterino mafiarino donerino
twitch chat
April 2014
imaqtpie

Canadian man brofisting the local Greek population

twitchquotes: Last night in Greece, Greek police heard reports of a Canadian man in a blue tacky sweater walking around the streets at night, 'brofisting' the local population. As a result 20,000 greek citizens have contracted the casualitis. If you see this man, please report to greek policerino department.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Pekora cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Pekora's wig and clothes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as a tomato and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made mde feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my clothes. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Yep peko." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter peko?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "Oh God, Pekora!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Pekora."
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing