[Copypasta] Muffins the dog in love with cats

twitchquotes: I'm muffins! i'm a dog that is in LOVE with cats! That's right! I know it sounds crazy because floofy doogos aren't supposed to breed with sassy kitties but I grew up with them and have just never really wanted anything to o with other puppers. It just feels so good to be a big strong dog loving a slender and fragile kitty! I can't help myself! Their long tail seductively swishing effortlessly through the air... I'm getting too excited now! I need to go to the park! I'm going to go play now!
twitch chat
July 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Obama

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–’ โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–Œโ–’ โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–Œโ–’ โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ– โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–„โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆ
April 2021

Based

"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
March 2021

Kripp's MALDHAWK

twitchquotes: Late last year, we were on an expedition to find the rarest hairstyle of them all.. the "MALDHAWK" A combination of MALD and a hawk nest, it combines the fluidity of middle aged male pattern baldness to a contrast of dead rats. Much to our chagrin, we found it April 13th, 2020, on a morose Canadian gypsy's stream. He had over 10k viewers at the time of writing this
twitch chat
April 2020
Kripp

I am coming back from my 10 minute ban

twitchquotes: I am coming back from my 10 minute ban, and I want to say that I think it was bullshit. Yes, I wrote a funny paragraph that turned into copypasta, which happened to bring a laugh or a smile to a few people. If you mods wanted that to stop, you could have just said so, there is so much copypasta going on in this chat that I could have never thought that deserved a 10 minute ban. Reggie is probably a mod in here and he is the one that banned me. Anyway, I'm glad to be back
twitch chat
April 2021

Classic

MODS

Today I finally came out as dreamgender to my family and friends, this is how it went.

I woke up in the morning at 7am and immediately went to wake up my parents. I explained to them how I'm dreamgender and dreamsexual but they didnt even know who dream is, boomers. I had to explain to them its a sexy minecraft youtuber and how Im connected to him emotionally and sexually. They didnt get mad at all (yay!) they just stared at me with a blank expression. I think theyre proud of me but just dont know what to think of it yet since it came as such as shock to them. I tried to show them a video of dream but they werent really interested and told me to go to school. in school the first class was english so I told the teacher that I had an important announcement that I would like to tell to the entire class. Yesterday I prepared a short powerpoint presentation on dreamgenders and dreamsexuals to make them better understand. I explained how dream is really hot and how I feel a deep connection to dream and how he is my soulmate and my identity. The teacher was so amazed I guess she didnt know what to say haha she looked like she was smiling. When I finished explaining why dream is hot and awesome, I started clapping expecting everyone else to do the same, but they didnt. My best friend didnt clap either which was really weird but maybe he was also surprised since I hadnt told him either. my teacher ended up being the only one clapping, so Im really thankful to her. I thought they didnt get it so I tried to explain in simpler terms that I love dream and how I am dream. Some girls were giggling the entire time so I called them out on it saying they shouldnt be laughing when I have prepared for this moment for so long. Then they started saying really dreamphobic things like saying its stupid and makes no sense. I explained to them why its homophobic and close minded but they didnt listen. Then some guy called me a stupid fucking nerd which made my blood boil. I challenged him to a duel in minecraft which he didnt even respond to and his friends were just laughing. Everyone else was silent I thought that they secretly supported me but just didnt want to face the same oppression dreamgenders and dreamsexuals have to face every day. Then the teacher told me to get back to my seat and started the lesson like nothing happened. I told her I wanted to show the class a compilation of minecraft manhunt best moments but she didnt let me do it. After the class a bunch of my classmates came to me and asked if I was joking or what and I tried to explain it to them but they were just making fun of me and saying Im weird and a creep. it was awful. I was bullied a bit before but now nobody wanted to talk to me the entire day even when I tried to show my ''friends'' (not friends anymore, theyre nazis apparently) some dream videos and discussed minecraft speedrunning they didnt respond at all. I've been crying the entire day because I cant believe the people I thought were cool were dreamphobes/racists/nazis as well. ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ its honestly really crushing how people are still like this in 2021. now Im starting to realize I dont need those kinds of toxic people in my life and the only person I truly need is Dream. Dream is my boyfriend, my gender, my sexuality, my identity and my best friend all at once, why would I need anyone else?
June 2021

Dreamgender

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