[Copypasta] Muffins the dog in love with cats

twitchquotes: I'm muffins! i'm a dog that is in LOVE with cats! That's right! I know it sounds crazy because floofy doogos aren't supposed to breed with sassy kitties but I grew up with them and have just never really wanted anything to o with other puppers. It just feels so good to be a big strong dog loving a slender and fragile kitty! I can't help myself! Their long tail seductively swishing effortlessly through the air... I'm getting too excited now! I need to go to the park! I'm going to go play now!
twitch chat
July 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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Reynad is like a pigeon

twitchquotes: Reynad is like a pigeon. Pigeons are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else. They poo on people they don't like; they poo on people they don't even know. The only real difference between reynad and a pigeon is that reynad intends to rob us of our lives, our health, our honor, and our belongings.
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Bender demends a voltron deck

twitchquotes: ¦̵ ̵ ̵ ̵ ̵(̢ ̡└̅┘͇ (▤8כ−◦ BENDER demands a VOLTRON deck
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

After a good game in csgo, i added him

twitchquotes: After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship. I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life. When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear. Turns out he was vegan. Don't trust this guy.
twitch chat
September 2017

CSGO

Fapping to trap porn

twitch chat
July 2017

KappaPride

My boyfriend doesnt know (from r/trueoffmychest)

At the beginning of this month, my boyfriend received an email from his brother with the subject "Dude check this out" and a Google Doc called "!!NEW RAP!!". When my boyfriend opened it, all that was on the doc was a picture of Nikocado Avocado’s asshole. When my boyfriend texted his brother about receiving his email, he replied "what email?". They’ve been going back and forth since about the email, my boyfriend’s brother saying he never sent an email and my boyfriend thinking he’s keeping up the act. What my boyfriend doesn’t know is I sent the email. I made an almost identical looking email, one letter off, and even managed to find the exact email profile picture from his brother’s LinkedIn. Now it kills me every time I see them go at it. I’m literally pissing myself as I write this.
May 2022

Reddit

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