[Copypasta] Joseph Kony's message to Kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, I am famous child soldier militia commander Joseph Kony. I want to help you make your own child soldier militia too so we can fight the white man as one. I hope you make the right decision and remember, dongerino dongerino please no copi pasterino banerino Al Pacino cappuccino orange moccha frappuccino steal your kiderino.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Millerino Druidino

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Kripparian, its Reynad's attourney here, i see you are using my client's new deck, the Millerino Druidino. We will send you the fees for using his new deck idea, please stay in touch with us or we will have to take the needed providences. Have a good climb, no pasterino please. Nice cat u have.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Greek Prime Minister Georgios Pastopoulos

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, this is Greek Prime Minister Georgios Pastopoulos, since you left our exports of 'BROFISTS' have dropped to 0 and the economy is in shambles. What little food we can afford is used to feed a sad betrayed cat we found. Please come back.
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground

twitchquotes: Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground, the adult marketplace. You've been ignoring my calls about your outstanding debt of $12.99 for Big Vegan Balls IV. I'm not here to shame or embarrass you for your taste in husky, sweaty man love, but I've got a business to run, and I wouldn't be able to provide you with the entertainment you frequently enjoy if I didn't get paid. Please don't make me revoke your platinum membership.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hey Kripp! I want to tell you a secret

twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Great Thermo-War

twitchquotes: It is the year 2134. I am one of the last people on the planet. Nearly everyone was wiped out in the Great Thermo-War. Now there is no reason to live. I open my holodeck-transponder and go to "Twitch tv". I turn on Kripp's stream and see that he has made it to Rank 10. I succumb to my radiation poisoning.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing