[Copypasta] Spam so I may stay warm

twitchquotes: Hello chat. My home is very cold and I do not know if I will make it through the night. Whenever the chat spams, my old laptop heats up very quickly. It is the only thing keeping me alive. Please chat, spam as much as possible so I may stay warm and survive the frigid night.
twitch chat
June 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Try being nicer when you say that Calvin

twitchquotes: Try being nicer when you say that Calvin so it comes across as constructive and less toxic that way you won't hurt anyone's feelings and everyone will be happy :)
twitch chat
October 2018
aimbotcalvin

Overwatch

Mr Qtpie apepars to be a boosted bonobo

twitchquotes: monkaS ☝️ I-I hate to point this out mr qtpie b-but you appear to be a boosted bonobo monkaS 👉
twitch chat
February 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

your streams lately have really helped me

twitchquotes: hey [streamer], your streams lately have really helped me with my depression, bleakness, dejection, distress, sorrow, my car trouble, my 401k, my grades, my slimp dick, my underperforming AMD driver, the armenian genocide, the galloping campaign, the war in the vietnamese, oh god they are in the trees, the battle of antietam, the housing crisis of 2008, the bankruptcy of greece in 2015, the explosion of chernobyl, my late grandma denise
twitch chat
December 2020

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: • ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight • ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor • ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) • ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns • ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man • ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" • ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos • ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) • ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

Become one with the awkward

twitchquotes: Ｗｈｅｎ Ｒｅｙｎａｄ ｄａｒｅ， ｍｙ ｐａｌｍ ａｕｔｏｍａｔｉｃａｌｌｙ ｇｏ ｔｏ ｆａｃｅ． Ｉ ｂｅｃｏｍｅ ｏｎｅ ｗｉｔｈ ｔｈｅ ａｗｋｗａｒｄ， ａｎｄ ｃｒｉｎｇｅ． Ｐｌｓ ｎｏ ｃｏｐｙｐａｓｔｅｒｉｎｏ．
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
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