[Copypasta] Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat!

twitchquotes: Oh my god, why do you losers care so much about these streamers and emotes and bits and stuff? You act like streamers are close friends of yours or something, but they're just manipulating you to give them money and attention. Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat! Go out and live your own damn life instead of watching someone else play video games while copy and pasting pointless blocks of text!
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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"Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!"

twitchquotes: "Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!" screams Kripp at the struggling mobile game dev who's game he is being sponsored to play. "How am I supposed to hit rank 1 without a massive head-start over everyone else!? I have to be able to brag to my chat about being #1 in every game I play!" The developer, scared, gives in to his demands. Business as usual for the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

sellout

My Grandfather smoked his whole life

My Grandfather smoked his whole life. I was about 10 years old when my mother said to him, 'If you ever want to see your grandchildren graduate, you have to stop immediately.'. Tears welled up in his eyes when he realized what exactly was at stake. He gave it up immediately. Three years later he died of lung cancer. It was really sad and destroyed me. My mother said to me- 'Don't ever smoke. Please don't put your family through what your Grandfather put us through." I agreed. At 28, I have never touched a cigarette. I must say, I feel a very slight sense of regret for never having done it, because your post gave me cancer anyway.
March 2021

Classic

Rick Astley paradox

twitchquotes: If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.
twitch chat
June 2020

Classic

Goku drip

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣤⣤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣦⠈⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣶⣦⣍⠐⢼⣿⣿⣧⠈⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣿⣿⣿⣦⣴⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢠⣄⣒⣚⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡽⣿⠟⢃⣿⠟⡉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠶⢯⣭⣿⢹⡟⢶⣗⠀⢸⠇⢁⣠⠫⠟⣹⣿⣯⡭⠶⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢙⣄⠣⠁⠈⠓⠊⠐⠃⠀⠀⣰⣿⣏⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢉⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣯⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠘⢛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣧⣀⡀⠶⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣠⣀⣀⣿⡿⠃⢢⣠⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠿⣿⡿⣷⡿⠿⣿⢿⡿⠩⢹⣿⡟⠉⠉⠉⢹⣿⢻⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣷⣿⣿⠉⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡾⢶⣿⣦⣿⣷⡇⢁⠚⡇⠐⢀⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣿⣧⣀⣠⣇⡰⢀⡿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣵⡎⠹⣿⣿⣿⣁⣾⢻⣿⢻⣟⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣾⣿⡿⠛⠛⢛⡟⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣞⣰⠞⣩⣿⣻⡇⢠⠃⠸⠉⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⢈⡁⠤⠁⠌⢉⢙⣿⣐⣧⣤⣾⢇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡿⢿⢋⡍⢇⠛⣿⣧⣼⣦⣴⣔⣠⣿⣿⣿⣯⣦⣤⣦⣤⣦⣄⣸⡻⢛⠋⠉⠻⠿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠀⣆⣷⣴⣶⠿⣿⡿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⢿⣿⢉⠉⣿⣿⣷⣾⣤⣭⡁⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠐⣉⣌⠇⠐⠁⡄⣿⣿⣿⠈⡠⢾⡇⠠⠠⣼⣽⡟⢣⠄⣹⣿⡖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣉⠁⣿⣷⣿⡟⢿⡵⣾⣶⣦⣿⣿⣿⣴⣷⣾⣷⠖⡴⠿⣿⣿⠷⠚⢛⡻⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣆⣿⣿⣿⣧⠐⡅⢘⠃⣿⣿⣿⣟⠿⡿⣿⣧⣈⠴⢃⠘⣻⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⢻⣿⠃⢸⣿⣶⣿⡿⡟⢉⣿⢿⣻⣼⣧⠂⠛⢿⣷⣟⣀⣥⡼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣏⡙⣿⣾⣿⣿⠿⢄⠉⣸⡿⠁⠉⠉⠟⢬⢛⢚⠻⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⣦⣅⣙⣿⣧⣮⣬⣽⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣶⣮⢧⢠⠙⣰⢹⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⣽⣶⣿⣿⣷⣼⠟⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢥⣏⢿⢯⣿⡟⠀⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣠⢈⠲⠟⣛⠏⣍⣏⠬⣄⡺⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣾⣿⣃⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣒⣴⣦⣾⣶⣾⣶⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
March 2021

EU "Expect Unsatisfaction” is known as the fastest region to arrive at the Airport

EU "Expect Unsatisfaction” is known as the fastest region to arrive at the Airport. Since they gave up on the LoL Worlds Championship, they are investing in Speedruns. In particular they are current worldrecord holders in Airport no wins Any %
October 2021

EU vs NA

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