[Copypasta] Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat!

twitchquotes: Oh my god, why do you losers care so much about these streamers and emotes and bits and stuff? You act like streamers are close friends of yours or something, but they're just manipulating you to give them money and attention. Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat! Go out and live your own damn life instead of watching someone else play video games while copy and pasting pointless blocks of text!
twitch chat
May 2019
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Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

Fortnite default dance 8

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣿⣉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠉⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿ ⠀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⣿⣶ ⣤⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣤ ⠉⠉⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠒⠛⠿⠿⠿ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠉⠿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣤⠀⠛⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣭⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⠉
ascii art
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

Yep

twitchquotes: sneaky's lips began to form the word. his lips were pursed into what couldn't be quite called an O shape, the sound of a C starting to leave his mouth. his lips stayed rounded as he let out the O, then finally flattened as he released the word. "cock," he finally spoke into the microphone, the tantalizing seconds over. he smiled watching the endless spam of "Yep", seeing the storm just one word could create.
twitch chat
July 2020
Sneaky

THIS CHATROOM IS TRULY BLESSED BY ME

twitchquotes: ◟(∗❛ัᴗ❛ั∗)◞I'M THE SPAM-FAIRY AND THIS CHATROOM IS TRULY BLESSED BY ME ◟(∗❛ัᴗ❛ั∗)◞
twitch chat
November 2014
TheRace

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
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