[Copypasta] I hate you

Mark, let me tell you something. Pay close attention to the text that I am about to write. An average human body has about 38 trillion cells. In each of these cells there is a spiral helix of DNA that, if stretched to its maximum, is about two meters long. DNA is one of the densest stores of information on the planet: a single gram of DNA stores about 700 terabytes of information. If we stretched out the 76 trillion meters of DNA in my body and recorded, character by character, the word "Hate" over and over and over again, this pile of information could not store the tiniest fraction of a trillionth of the hatred that I feel for you right now. Every drop of blood in my body cries out for your death. My very soul writhes in disgust. Your mere existence is a blasphemy and an affront to every possible virtue and quality that any rational being can possess. You are a deception to Satan himself.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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This is our town SCRUB

twitchquotes: (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง This is our town SCRUB (ง ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)ง(ง •̀_•́)ง Yeah beat it! (ง •̀_•́)ง
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Kripp

POV: you get approached by the weaboo kid

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February 2021

Weebs

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise?

twitchquotes: Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.
twitch chat
April 2017

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

Classic

America as a nation can be defined as a single word

"America as a nation can be defined as a single word: Iwasinthefootasdkjhasjckabcxdqiweywqfootuidhaksb... excuse me, I was in the foothills of the Himalayas with Xi Jinping, traveling with him, traveled 17,000 miles when I was Vice President. I don't know that for a fact." - Joe Biden
April 2022

Joe Biden

Tesla is restarting production today

twitchquotes: Tesla is restarting production today against Alameda County rules. I will be on the line with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be me.
twitch chat
May 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing