[Copypasta] Apparently I "ruined" Thanksgiving dinner

twitchquotes: Apparently I "ruined" Thanksgiving dinner by bringing my girlfriend Asuka. My mum didn't care that she was a giat robot pilot, tasked with protecting the world after the Second Impact. She insisted that Asuka isn't real and now we're banned from the local country club. Anyways, my mum says if I don't bring a "real" girl to our Christmas dinner I'm going to get kicked out of the house!!! Asuka sets the bar pretty high but if you think you can compete with her please message me :)
twitch chat
May 2019

Weebs

I used to be a real ad
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UwU what's this? Nuzzles how are you

twitchquotes: Rawr🐲🐊 x3😋 nuzzles how are you😉🙂 pounces on you😛 you’re😃 so😄 warm🤒😈 o3o😏 notices😯 you have a bulge🍆 o:😯😮 someone’s happy😃 ;)😉😜 nuzzles your necky wecky😈😗~ murr~ hehehe😊 rubbies👋🤚 your bulgy🍆 wolgy you’re😌 so big😯😮 :oooo rubbies👋🤚 more on your bulgy🍆 wolgy it🚫 doesn’t stop🛑 growing ·///· 😐kisses😚😘 you🙂 and lickies😝👅💦💦
twitch chat
April 2019

Emoji Pasta

Weebs

POV: you get approached by the weaboo kid

🚶‍♂️are you the👁👄👁new girl😜heh☺️ i thought so😌i’ve never seen👀 you before🤔 cone e chee wah ✋🏻 i’m david-kun😚it’s so nice😛to finally meet you🤪you look just like😳my waifu🥵HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹anyways😐i’m so sorry😔about the jerks😡in class😤theyre all👊🏻BAKA👊🏻they only want😭one thing😫not me🥴i just like🤓to watch📺my favourite anime😍jiu jitsu kaisen😍and read manga😎mmmalso👉🏻👈🏻ithinkyourereallycool😅kawaee desu neigh😳🐴HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹HEH👹nghuuh😣i’m sorry😤i’m just nervous😭okay😡it’s just😉well😋it’s just🥵mm I JUST WANT TO KNOW🤔IF I CAN SUCK👅ON YOUR NIPPLETS🤭OKAY❓well😰what do you 👊🏻👊🏻NNGGGH😵
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⣿⣯⣿⣟⣟⡼⣿⡼⡿⣷⣿⣿⣿⠽⡟⢋⣿⣿⠘⣼⣷⡟⠻⡿⣷⡼⣝⡿⡾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢁⣵⡇⡟⠀⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⡇⣴⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⡇⠀⢣⣿⣷⣀⡏⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠷⠁⠀⠛⠛⠋⠀⠂⠹⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠉⠁⠀⠘⠛⠛⠛⠃⢸⣯ ⣿⡇⠀⣄⣀⣀⣈⣁⠈⠉⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠎⠈⠀⣀⣁⣀⣀⡠⠈⠉ ⣿⣯⣽⡿⢟⡿⠿⠛⠛⠿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢠⣴⣾⠛⠛⠿⠻⠛⠿⣷⣶ ⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⣶⣿⣫⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠰⣿⠿⠾⣿⡇⠀⠀⢺⣿ ⣿⣿⠻⡀⠀⠀⠙⠏⠒⡻⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⡓⢚⠟⠁⠀⠀⡾⢫ ⣿⣿⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⡈⣉⡀⡠⣐⣅⣽⣺⣿⣯⡡⣴⣴⣔⣠⣀⣀⡀⢀⡀⡀⠀⣸ ⣿⣿⣷⣿⣟⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⢾⣷⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⠫⡾⠟⠫⢾⠯⡻⢟⡽⢶⢿⣿⣿⡛⠕⠎⠻⠝⠪⢖⠝⠟⢫⠾⠜⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣋⣀⣈⣢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣐⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡔⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⡿⣿⣿⢽⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⢅⣙⣙⠿⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⣅⠀⠓⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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NSFW

UwU

⡆⣐⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⠅⢗⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⠕⠕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕ ⢐⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⣕⢕⢕⠕⠁⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⠅⡄⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕ ⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⠅⢗⢕⠕⣠⠄⣗⢕⢕⠕⢕⢕⢕⠕⢠⣿⠐⢕⢕⢕⠑⢕⢕⠵⢕ ⢕⢕⢕⢕⠁⢜⠕⢁⣴⣿⡇⢓⢕⢵⢐⢕⢕⠕⢁⣾⢿⣧⠑⢕⢕⠄⢑⢕⠅⢕ ⢕⢕⠵⢁⠔⢁⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⡐⣕⢽⠐⢕⠕⣡⣾⣶⣶⣶⣤⡁⢓⢕⠄⢑⢅⢑ ⠍⣧⠄⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣔⢕⢄⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡑⢕⢤⠱⢐ ⢠⢕⠅⣾⣿⠋⢿⣿⣿⣿⠉⣿⣿⣷⣦⣶⣽⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⢹⣷⣷⡅⢐ ⣔⢕⢥⢻⣿⡀⠈⠛⠛⠁⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠈⠛⠛⠁⠄⣼⣿⣿⡇⢔ ⢕⢕⢽⢸⢟⢟⢖⢖⢤⣶⡟⢻⣿⡿⠻⣿⣿⡟⢀⣿⣦⢤⢤⢔⢞⢿⢿⣿⠁⢕ ⢕⢕⠅⣐⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⣿⣿⡄⠛⢀⣦⠈⠛⢁⣼⣿⢗⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⢕⡏⣘⢕ ⢕⢕⠅⢓⣕⣕⣕⣕⣵⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣕⢕⢕⢕⢕⡵⢀⢕⢕ ⢑⢕⠃⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⢕⢕⢕ ⣆⢕⠄⢱⣄⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢁⢕⢕⠕⢁ ⣿⣦⡀⣿⣿⣷⣶⣬⣍⣛⣛⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⢛⣛⣉⣭⣤⣂⢜⠕⢑⣡⣴⣿
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Weebs

Classic

Being a hentai actress must be so weird

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: you’re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000¥ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.
May 2021

Weebs

Text-to-Speech Playing