[Copypasta] Copypasta being funny is just incomprehensible

twitchquotes: I always thought comedy was something I could never lose my grasp on, but "Copypasta" being funny to anybody is just incomprehensible.
twitch chat
April 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The current meta is so good STUNNED

twitchquotes: hey chat *STUNNED* the current *STUNNED* meta is so *STUNNED* good, as a *STUNNED* tank main i *STUNNED* find myself *STUNNED* getting more *STUNNED* compliments for *STUNNED* shatters
twitch chat
July 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

Classic

Navy Seal

Hi Kripp, this is Pogo’s mom

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Pogo’s mom. I noticed you haven’t been picking my son for your team in gym class. Pogo has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesn’t make it easy on him when you reroll and say, "We’re never taking Pogo". I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Pogo has mech synergy and can be combined into one big Pogo if you have 3! Why don’t you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

When well met, my eye automatically go to the paladin

twitchquotes: ο½—ο½ˆο½…ο½Žγ€€ο½—ο½…ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½ο½…ο½”οΌŒγ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½…ο½™ο½…γ€€ο½ο½•ο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½ƒο½ο½Œο½Œο½™γ€€ο½‡ο½γ€€ο½”ο½γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½ο½ο½Œο½ο½„ο½‰ο½ŽοΌŽγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½–ο½‰ο½Žο½…γ€€ο½“ο½ˆο½‰ο½…ο½Œο½„γ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½ƒο½‹γ€€ο½ο½Žο½„γ€€ο½†ο½…ο½…ο½Œγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½…γ€€ο½“ο½…ο½˜γ€€ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆγ€€γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½’ο½…ο½ƒο½’ο½•ο½‰ ο½”οΌŽγ€€ο½ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½‚ο½…ο½ƒο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½‡γ€€ο½‡ο½…ο½”γ€€ο½„ο½ο½—ο½ŽοΌŽ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

I hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you're thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no, Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A god damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he's supposed to be a hero? And I can't even tell you how many damn times I've seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible.
twitch chat
May 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing