[Copypasta] 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

United States of America is now known as West Iran

twitchquotes: The year is 2024. The United States of America is now known as West Iran after the assassination of Supreme Leader Donald Trump from drone warfare. I hide in my nuclear bunker, praying to God that I survive another night. I open my laptop and see Kripp streaming some HS battlegrounds, still forcing murlocs and hardstuck at 7k MMR. "Still never lucky, huh old friend..." I whisper to myself as the bombs fall outside...
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Hi Tyler i'm Adam, Macaiyla's Ex Boyfriend

twitchquotes: Hi Tyler i'm Adam, Macaiyla's Ex Boyfriend. I dont know why she choosed a 5Β΄6 peanut looking guy over me (Im a 6Β΄7 College athlete and i bench press 500 pounds) but im glad she came around a good fella like you. Remember she like watching at sunsets and reciving chin kisses! Have a good one Buddy!
twitch chat
October 2018
Tyler1

I'm meeting a girl (a real one)

Not gonna be active on Discord tonight. I'm meeting a girl (a real one) in half an hour (wouldn't expect a lot of you to understand anyway) so please don't DM me asking me where I am (im with the girl, ok) you'll most likely get aired because ill be with the girl (again I don't expect you to understand) shes actually really interested in me and its not a situation i can pass up for some meaningless Discord degenerates (because ill be meeting a girl, not that you really are going to understand) this is my life now. Meeting women and not wasting my precious time online, I have to move on from such simple things and branch out (you wouldnt understand)
February 2021

Discord

Stop spamming your emojis

twitchquotes: Hey guys, I would greatly appreciate if you stop spamming your 'emojis'. I am trying to watch this stream in peace but you ANIMALS are disrupting my time. I will go to complain on r/DotA2 if you continue. Thanks
twitch chat
August 2017

I hate Twitch Chat

Dota 2

The year is 2035, you buy g fuel with doge coin

The year is 2035, you enter your local 7/11 to buy yourself a g fuel before your shift in the local crypto mine. The android working the counter says they only accept doge coin. You pull out your phone, draw a stick man in less than five seconds on a yellow back ground and then sell it as an NFT. From the sell you make 6 doge coin, about 5 million dollars in old world money. You go to buy the drink only to find out that from the time you closed your phone to the time you talked to the cashier the coins had dropped in value to only 3 dollars per coin and you now owe at least 10 doge coin to the robot for the gamer fuel. You leave the store, frustrated, and drive off in your Tesla
December 2021

Cryptocurrency

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