[Copypasta] 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks

twitchquotes: 4 people broke into my house and held me hostage last night. Somehow they've heard I hold 80 billion dollars in twitch stocks and wanted me to withdraw it to a specific bank account. I had to explain for 2 hours how it's all fake money and that I've spent almost a week trading fake stocks just to gain nothing. They ended up calling me a fucking loser and left..
twitch chat
March 2019
TwitchStocks.com is a new website where users can buy and sell streamer stocks using fake money
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Fabulous

⊂_ヽ 　 ＼＼ ＿ 　　 ＼(　•_•) F 　　　 <　⌒ヽ A 　　　/ 　 へ＼ B 　　 /　　/　＼＼ U 　　 ﾚ　ノ　　 ヽ_つ L 　　/　/ O 　 /　/| U 　(　(ヽ S 　|　|、＼ 　| 丿 ＼ ⌒) 　| |　　) / `ノ )　　Lﾉ (_／
ascii art
December 2020

Karma from the vegan produce co-op

twitchquotes: Greetings, kripp! Blessings! It's Karma from the vegan produce co-op. I didn't know you were some kind of internet superstar hahahaha. Send me an astral projection, dude. Btw, did you ever find a way to make tofu edible? It's been a big challenge for me hahah. You have such a kind aura. It's so calming to see you again. You have the address for my drum circle. Peace, my fellow
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Imagine Fortnite Jonesy in Smash

Imagine this: You're watching the new Nintendo Direct. As it begins you hope to see the new smash reveal, and are hoping you get the character you so desperately wanted, whether it's Crash Bandicoot or Sora. The trailer begins with the classic smash opening. As you watch the trailer, you begin to feel hope that your dream may have come true. But then, at the part where the character is revealed, you hear a bus horn, and wonder "Is it coming from outside?" But no. It's from the trailer. You watch a manly figure drop out of the sky, landing gracefully in front of the characters he is about to defeat. It gazes upon his sharp-bladed pickaxe, his luxurious blond hair, and his shining silver dog tags. As the sun fades away, you finally see who it really was: It was Jonesy from Fortnite. It's a long shot, I know. But imagine.
September 2021

Fortnite

Super Smash Bros

Fungus wojak / Shroomjak / Shrigma male

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⡃⠀⠿⠇⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠁⠀⣰⡄⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠸⡷⠃⢀⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠋⢀⣀⡀⠀⢿⣳⡄⢳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠞⠁⠀⠸⣌⣻⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⢾⢁⡞⠉⠉⠓⢦⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡴⠯⠴⠋⠈⠧⣄⣀⣀⣠⠇⠀⠀⠶⠆⠀⢲⡆⠀⠀⠨⠷⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣅⢀⣠⠤⠶⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⣟⠛⠛⠛⠒⡒⠒⠒⠷⠦⢤⣀⠀⠀⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⢡⢟⣉⣀⠒⠶⠤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠈⠑⣆⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⠀⢈⣉⣉⣉⣛⣒⣿⣿⣶⣤⠼⠗⠶⠾⣅⣀⡤⠞⣁⣤⠴⠂⠘⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠈⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣭⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢶⣋⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣶⣶⣿⣭⣥⡏⢀⣈⣈⠉⠀⠀⠐⠂⠠⠈⣏⣉⣉⣻⣶⣞⡵⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢹⠃⠻⢿⣿⠟⠀⠘⢾⣿⣿⠀⡿⠛⠛⠓⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠉⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⣴⠀⠀⣹⡄⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠁⠉⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠄⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀
ascii art
July 2021

Kripp is actually still living in Canada

twitchquotes: Kripp Is actually still living in Canada, He's Got Artificial sunlight to make it look like he's living in another timezone with Speakers that emit background sound All so that he can get more Euro and Australian Viewers and make it look like he's not actually a vampire so vampire hunters don’t hunt him down. I see through your disguise Kripp Kappa
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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