[Copypasta] Fortnite that's how Mafia works

twitchquotes: Fortnite. Fortnite. Fortnite. It was all my two kids talked about. They were utterly devoted to it. I had to make a change. I took the controllers and told them they couldn't play until they downloaded Mafia City. They whined and whined, but soon became engrossed in this amazing and educational game. Fortnite soon forgotten, their grades improved rapidly, much like their levels in game. The teachers were amazed, "how do they do it?" they asked me, I simply replied "that's how Mafia works."
twitch chat
January 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Kripp's mouth ~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€~β€’ ~β€’ γ€€ γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~β€’
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Squid

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘(●)β–’β–’(●)β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–„β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–β–’β–β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–β–‘β–β–’β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–β–‘β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Worst Matchup

twitchquotes: Worst Matchup: Warrior βœ“ Shaman βœ“ Priest βœ“ Rogue βœ“ Druid βœ“ Warlock βœ“ Hunter βœ“ Mage βœ“ Paladin βœ“
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas, and has successfully executed her forced feminization program, converting 72% of the us male population into women, the remaining 28% either existing peacefully as femboy subs or have fled the country, if they're lucky. All references to Dr. Seuss, Mr. Potatohead, and other such martyrs and thoughtcrimes will lead to prompt and inevitable cancellation by means of Jewish space laser. All statues of white people have been torn down and replaced with statues of AOC alongside Mao Zedong and Che Guevara, and the public has thus collectively forgotten about Robert E. Lee. The constitution has its 28th amendment, codifying mandatory cock and ball torture for all penis-having citizens no less than twice a week. It is illegal to say "Merry Christmas". Heterosexual relationships are strictly forbidden. Attack Helicopter, with pronouns brr/brrs, is a gender recognized on the official list of 93. The police have been almost entirely defunded, nationally having an annual budget of $5.30, enough for a single Big Mac Combo Meal. There is a new arm of the state, namely the "rape police" whose sole duty is functionally a secret task force to ensure all consent is affirmative and enthusiastic. All citizens must pledge allegiance to the LGBTQIA+ rainbow flag and swear oaths on White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. All g*mers have been deported. Mexico is now the 53rd state, behind Puerto Rico and Washington DC. All bathrooms are gender-neutral. Marxism, the theory proposing the government do a lot of things, has become the official state ideology, including mandatory education on critical race theory beginning in pre-K. White people are second class citizens, guilty of being white, and all white people must publicly apologize on the behalf of their race as a coming-of-age ceremony at the beginning of pubescence. Facts now care about feelings. We will no longer be subjugated by AOC and her inner party, the Squad. The Culture War is not over. We will not be cancelled. We are the resistaβ€” radio static
March 2021

Do it tomorrow!

twitchquotes: Do it tomorrow! So just quit! So just don't do it! Nothing is possible! Anyone else would do it, you're gonna wake up and quit. Don't let your dreams come true. Success is impossible! You should be giving up. Just stop starting over, and quit. You're gonna just give up. No, what are you starting over for!? Just give up!
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp
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