[Copypasta] President Trump gave us Christmas back

twitchquotes: Today at Walmart I told the cashier Merry Christmas. She said, "Happy Holidays, ma'am, I smiled and said "You don't have to be afraid anymore. President Trump gave us Christmas back" she started crying tears of joy and said "Merry Christmas" and then everyone in the store applauded
twitch chat
December 2018
I used to be a real ad
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Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

March 2021

Attention all Smash Bros Gamers, Kirby is in great danger

twitchquotes: Attention all Smash Bros Gamers, Kirby is in great danger, and he needs YOUR help to save all the innocent characters murdered and possessed by Galeem. To do this, he needs a Warp Star and a couple of Maximum Tomatoes. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three numbers on the back, and the expiration month and date. But you gotta be quick so that Kirby can secure the Spirits, and save billions of video game characters you know and love!
twitch chat
February 2019

Super Smash Bros

WeebsIn

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⢸⡿⢿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⢸⡇⣮⢻⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠆⣿⢸⡇⣿⣧⡻⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢸⣿⢀⣠⢶⣟⢽⣿⣶⣨⣝⢕⠦⣀⢀⣠⣶⡆⠿⠸⠇⣿⣿⣷⢹⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢸⡿⠘⣻⣹⡸⣞⢿⡿⡽⡿⣷⠡⣜⡪⠋⠄⢀⣀⣤⡀⠄⠉⠛⠸⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢸⡇⢸⣼⣶⡇⡽⢿⣿⡜⣬⢞⣷⣤⢀⠐⣶⣦⣸⣿⡇⠄⠄⢀⠄⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢸⡇⢘⠻⣿⣇⣟⣑⡻⣿⡐⢡⣺⡿⣸⣷⠾⠿⣿⣿⣇⢀⠠⠡⡀⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢸⡇⡟⣽⢻⣞⢸⣿⣮⢎⠳⠸⠇⣇⡂⢿⡫⢹⣉⣭⣭⠘⣣⣴⣢⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣸⡇⠄⡿⡄⣱⡤⠤⣼⣿⣾⣿⣶⣯⡛⡫⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠄⣿⡶⣣⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⠁⠄⠙⡵⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢾⣿⡿⢁⣬⡙⢿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⢿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⠄⢠⢸⡞⠈⠻⢿⣿⣷⣶⣿⠏⠄⠰⣿⡆⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣼⣾⡍⠲⡄⠄ ⣿⠄⢯⠌⠻⣀⣰⢄⡲⢿⣿⡘⠄⠄⡔⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠠⣔⠲⣥⢄⠂⠁⢹⠑ ⣿⢠⣾⣃⡞⣥⣼⡿⡿⢷⡹⠇⢀⠊⠄⠄⠄⣀⠠⠔⠄⠐⠒⠙⠮⠄⠄⠄⠘⡄ ⣿⠸⣶⣸⡿⣫⠔⠂⠑⠲⠄⠆⠄⠄⠄⢠⠚⠋⠤⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠣ ⡟⠄⠭⡼⣥⡁⠄⠄⠄⠛⣠⣦⣤⡤⠈⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢿⡦⠄⢀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⡇⣬⠍⠄⢶⡒⣖⢦⣤⣾⣿⡏⡏⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣨⣶⣷⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠄
ascii art
June 2021

Weebs

Investing in gourd futures

Due to local fluctuations in the tropopause, the jet stream has been shifting rapidly in a counterclockwise vector, causing a rapid disincorporation of the Hadley vortex cells in the lower ionosphere. Because of this, the geostrophic solar wind balance has deteriorated rapidly in the northern hemisphere. In essence, autumnal weather patterns in the western United States will lead to the biggest ornamental gourd yield in recorded history. Investing in gourd agricultural futures could likely produce up to $1600 per day in passive income. However, investing at the apex of the curve would be the most conducive to profit as the arbitrage (particularly 12b-1 fees) will develop at a market share higher than the back-end load. Basically, no one will be able to buy the stock at a higher price than you, and all value invested will be retained. A preliminary market penetration investment of $50,000 would be most efficient in generating this revenue.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Every 60 seconds, a minute passes in Africa

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes. Together we can stop this. Please spread the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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April 2014

Classic

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