[Copypasta] ATTENTION ALL HALF LIFE GAMERS

twitchquotes: ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL HALF LIFE GAMERS⚠️ Father Grigori is in great danger and needs your help to wipe out all of the headcrabs in ravenholm! To do this, he needs a shotgun and a gravity gun. To help him, all he needs is your parents credit card number and the three wacky numbers on the back, and the expiration date. But you gotta be quick so Father Grigori can achieve the epic victory Royale!!!!
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
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Duel of Hearthstone in the Shadow Realm

twitchquotes: ୧༼ಠزوಠ༽୨ FORSEN I challenge you to a duel of Hearthstone in the SHADOW REALM. The loser is banished to the shadow realm, but the winner gets to compete in the HS finals in duelist city. WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE FORSEN? ୧༼ಠزوಠ༽୨
twitch chat
March 2015
Forsen

is that… a GIRL?!!!?

is that… a GIRL?!!!? Uhhhhhhhhhhhh girls? uhhhhhhhhhhhhh like, here? *starts sweating* uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *starts drooling* uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *wide eyed* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts farting* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts shitting with bloodshot eyes* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *poopie leaking out of my shorts* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts convulsing which makes the shit run down my shaved legs even faster* UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH *gets a boner* UUUHHH-UHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUHHHH-UHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH *passes out*
May 2022

The Tomato Town Incident

At around 10:00 AM on the morning of December 18th, 2018, in what was widely believed to be an act of government-sponsored ethnic cleansing, two armed militia men were seen parachuting from a military plane into the vicinity of Tomato Town. Upon landing the two quickly unholstered assault rifles and entered the local pizzeria where a massacre of unarmed civilians unfolded as they kept shouting, "Get Down! Get Down!". Improvised explosives were then detonated at the site of the crime to obscure the victim's identities. The local police chief spotted the assailants as they were exiting the diner and shot one in the back before he was quickly revived by his accomplice as they boarded a "technical" pickup truck and headed southbound. The two militiamen were outnumbered but gave chase before being cornered in the streets of the nearby district of Pleasant Park where a shootout occurred with the police. The two assailants were seen chugging jugs of alcohol before getting back into the pickup truck and heading towards Moist Mire where the police lost them, deliberately detouring around Loot Lake as a local source had tipped them off to the stationing of UN peacekeeping forces in the area. 10 bodies were later discovered in the rubble of the Pizzeria's board room. Not long after the assailants left the area, a purple cloud believed to be an experimental chemical agent developed by the government swept the area, resulting in death by suffocation, making the town uninhabitable and turning the survivors of the massacre into refugees. Military contractors hired by the government bulldozed what was left of Tomato Town including the ruins of the Pizzeria as well as the memorial site for the victims and redeveloped it into a religious site/tourist attraction for the dominant religion of the country known as "Tomato Temple". To this day the government denies the massacre and subsequent chemical weapons attack despite multiple Human Rights agencies releasing interviews with the survivors and even one of the assailants coming forward with a testimony of guilt uploaded to social media after a UN Geneva Convention Probe confirmed the use of banned chemical agents.
March 2021

Fortnite

FunPlus Pheonix logo

twitchquotes: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡤⠀⠀⠀⠀⢤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠟⢡⣿⣧⣴⡶⠶⣦⣄⣀⣼⣿⡌⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⠏⠀⣼⣿⣿⣶⣄⠉⠀⠉⢋⣽⣿⣇⠀⠹⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⡟⣿⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⢾⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣿⢻⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⠁⠹⣇⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠇⠀⣸⠏⢘⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣇⠘⠧⠀⠠⡶⠤⠽⡿⢿⡿⣧⢤⣤⢼⡿⠿⢤⣶⡤⠤⠾⣧⣾⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⡇⠰⢶⡇⢸⡇⣿⢀⠻⢸⣿⡄⠈⢿⠃⢀⣾⣣⣿⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣶⣄⣀⣇⣸⣿⣇⣘⣁⣿⣸⣆⣸⣿⣿⡄⠀⢀⣾⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡏⣩⠉⡏⣿⣿⠉⣿⢹⠋⣭⣹⣿⣿⠃⠀⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⣤⣴⡇⠿⢿⠀⠿⢸⠗⠦⢸⣿⠃⢀⣾⡄⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠓⠛⠛⣳⡶⢞⡷⢒⡞⢳⠒⢾⠳⢶⣞⠛⠓⠒⠒⠛⠂⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣋⣰⡏⠀⣼⠀⠘⣇⠀⢳⣄⣹⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢶⣴⣿⠀⠀⣿⣤⡾⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠷⠞⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

SHOVE A HAMSTER

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ SHOVE A HAMSTER IN MY ASS ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
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