[Copypasta] The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

LCS, aka "Literally Cannot Sidelane"

twitchquotes: LCS, aka "Literally Cannot Sidelane", is Riot's premier Wildcard region held in the saltiest continent and denoted as such, NA. It is ridiculed for its poor international performance and macro, favouring the "NARAM" style.
twitch chat
February 2020
LCS

League of Legends

A reply to 'k'

K? K what? The letter before L? The letter after J? Did you know that in JK the K stands for “kidding?” So your reply is “kidding?” or K as in Potassium? Do you need some Special K for breakfast? K as in I can K/O you? Can I knock you out and feed you to hungry sharks? Sharks have a K in it. "K"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "K"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only letter you can comprehend is "K" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "K" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about a single letter? I bet you took the time to type that one letter too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "K" on your gravestone? Do you want people to remember you as the asshat who one day decided to respond to someone with a single letter? "Hey, look, everybody! It's that "K" guy!" That's who you are. You're going to be known as the "K" guy. How does it feel? Do you feel happy? Quite honestly, I don't care, which is why I'm not even going to respond to you. Goodbye, and good luck with your future as that guy who said "K".
April 2021

I LOVE YOU CHAT

⡟⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⢿⡟⠛⢻⣿⣿⠛⢻⡟⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿ ⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⡟⠄⢠⣶⡄⠄⢻⡀⠈⣿⡇⠄⣼⡇⠄⣶⣶⣶⣿ ⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⢸⣇⠄⢹⠄⢰⣿⡇⠄⣀⣀⣀⣿ ⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠈⠉⠉⣷⡀⠈⠛⠁⢀⣾⣿⡄⠄⠄⣾⣿⡇⠄⠛⠛⠛⣿ ⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⢻⣿⠟⠛⣻⡿⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⡟⠛⣿⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠏⠄⣰⡏⠄⣠⣶⡄⠄⢿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⣰⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣧⡀⠈⠛⠁⢀⣿⣇⠄⠙⠋⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠻⣿⡟⠛⣿⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⡟⠛⠻⣿⡟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⣴⣦⣀⣽⡇⠄⠿⠿⠄⠄⣿⣿⠁⢀⠄⢻⣧⣤⡄⠄⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⠘⣿⣿⠿⣿⡇⠄⣀⣀⠄⠄⣿⡏⠄⠾⠄⠈⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠙⠁⠄⣼⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⡿⠄⢠⣤⣄⠄⢹⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
May 2019

Hello Kripp this is Saul Goodman

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴛʜɪs ɪs sᴀᴜʟ ɢᴏᴏᴅᴍᴀɴ. ɪ'ᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ɪɴғᴏʀᴍᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴇᴅᴅʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍɪɴɢ ɪʟʟᴇɢᴀʟ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ ʙᴀsᴇᴍᴇɴᴛ ɪɴ ɢʀᴇᴇᴄᴇ. ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀs ᴍʏ ᴄʟɪᴇɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴄᴏᴜʀᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ғɪʟᴛʜʏ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴀɴᴅ ᴘʀᴏsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀᴄᴄᴜsᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Garfield

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠞⠉⢉⣭⣿⣿⠿⣳⣤⠴⠖⠛⣛⣿⣿⡷⠖⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠁⢀⣶⢻⡟⠿⠋⣴⠿⢻⣧⡴⠟⠋⠿⠛⠠⠾⢛⣵⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣿⡿⢶⣄⠀⢀⡇⢀⡿⠁⠈⠀⠀⣀⣉⣀⠘⣿⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠛⡹⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣭⣤⡈⢑⣼⣻⣿⣧⡌⠁⠀⢀⣴⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⣿⣴⠟⠋⠙⠻⣦⡰⣞⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⢫⣾⠋⣽⠟⠑⠛⢠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡈⠻⣍⠤⢤⣌⣀ ⢀⡞⣡⡌⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣇⠀⢾⣷⢤⣬⣉ ⡞⣼⣿⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠸⣿⣇⠈⠻ ⢰⣿⡿⢹⠃⠀⣠⠤⠶⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⠛⡄⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⡟⡀⠀⠈⡗⠲⠶⠦⢤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣸⣧⣤⣤⠤⠤⣿⣀⡀⠉⣼⡇⠀ ⣿⣴⣴⡆⠀⠀⠻⣄⠀⠀⠡⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠻⠟⠀⢀⠋⠉⠙⢷⡿⡇⠀ ⣻⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⠀⢀⣀⡾⣴⠃⠀ ⢿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⠄⣀⠠⠼⣁⠀⡱⠤⠤⠐⠁⠀⠀⣸⠋⢻⡟⠀⠀ ⠈⢧⣀⣤⣶⡄⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠖⠛⠻⣄⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡾⠋⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠈⠓⢦⣤⣤⣤⡤⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠚⢩⡅⣠⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣻⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡴⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing