[Copypasta] The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

69 is so funny

twitchquotes: 69 is so funny. Whenever I hear it, I just burst out laughing. I run out into the living room and grab the Tv remote. I start flicking through the channels. “You guys, it’s so funny, you’ll laugh so hard!” I can barely get it out as I’m laughing so hard, banging the table and snickering while I flick through the TV channels. I finally get to The CW, and the number 69 is on the bottom right-hand corner of the screen! My family and friends who were over all stand up in tremendous applause, and my wife and children come back from upstate to be with my comedic genius!
twitch chat
April 2020

Morbius is love. Morbius is life.

I was only nine years old. I loved Morbius so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Morbius every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Morbius is love", I would say, “Morbius is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Morbius. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Morbius. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, “It’s morbin time". He grabs me with his powerful morby hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Morbius. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Morbius. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Morbius. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Morbius looks him straight in the eye, and says, "Get morbed". Morbius leaves through my window. Morbius is love. Morbius is life.
June 2022

Morbius

As Kripp installed the minecraft

twitchquotes: ᴀs ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ɪɴsᴛᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪɴᴇᴄʀᴀғᴛ ɪ ʜᴇʟᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴀɢɢᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ. ɪ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ·ᴛ ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɢᴀᴍᴇs. ɪ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴀ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀs ɴᴏʟɪғᴇ. ɴᴏᴡ ɪ ᴀᴍ ɴᴏʟɪғᴇ. ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Reddit Snoo with a cock

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡏⠀⠀⠈⡆⠀⣠⠞⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢷⣶⣤⠠⠓⠋⠁⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⡤⠖⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⡽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠉⠳⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⢡⣾⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠇⠘⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⠒⠢⠀⠀⠀⠠⡤⢄⡼⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣄⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⣴⠛⣦⠀⠀⢀⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠈⠛⣶⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⢛⡝⠁⠙⠿⡿⠛⠚⢇⠀⠀⠀⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⣳⡦⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣴⢟⣿⣦⣄⡀⠈⢧⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠹⣮⣷⣤⡈⠙⠛⠲⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠳⢦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠻⣖⠦⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠋⠀⠸⣿⡗⠀⠀⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠒⠉⠘⠧⡤⠴⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2021

NSFW

Reddit

I am like a boomerang, I will always return

twitchquotes: Dear nazi mods. you may have permabanned my other account, but shitposting will always find a way. I will lie about how to make faces. I will accuse teams of 322. I will raise my dongers. So don't even waste your time banning me, because I am like a boomerang. I will always return. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino cappucino.
twitch chat
March 2014

MODS

Text-to-Speech Playing