[Copypasta] The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ฉ
twitch chat
August 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

This is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, this is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva. I have started working overtime at the power plant, and your sister Tatyana has gone to Berlin to sell her body to Kraut swine for money. We do all this to pay for your "Stoned Heart of the Cards" game. Please win tournament and send us rubles soon, so our family can be together again.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Horrible attack on my privacy

twitchquotes: Dear Mr Morosan, I was unaware of the fact that upon subscribing to your channel full of top notch casual gameplay, my personal rights would be violated. I did not ask to be "fisted". I hereby demand a public apology and a stack of OJ cartons as compensation for the psychological scars this horrible attack on my privacy has caused.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Am I the asshole for dropping my 6 year old son at an orphanage for his inability to trade options?

This started about 4 years ago when my son was 2 years old. I started to supplement his picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I feel like he has retained absolutely nothing even though I have spent every waking minute trying to make him understand. I have done almost everything that I have thought of including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while he is sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make him understand the market. I felt as though I got to a breaking point when he couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. I finally convinced my wife that we were doing the right thing when I said that he will soon be a Wendy's worker begging his wife's husband for a weekly allowance because he will never amount to be anything. I couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy check out Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska and maybe your luck will be better than mine with him.
September 2021

Am I The Asshole?

WallStreetBets

Only the fattest NA fan can hold his taco

twitchquotes: TBTacoLeft TBCheesePull TBTacoRight only the fattest NA fan can hold his taco โŽ OpieOP โŽ 
twitch chat
May 2016

EU vs NA

Meanwhile in Qtpie's chat

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Qtpie's chat: ~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€~ Kappa ~ Kappa ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ Kappa
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing