twitchquotes:
you vs the guy she tells you not to worry about 
you vs the guy she tells you not to worry about
twitch chat
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More Classic Copypastas
40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14
twitchquotes:
This chat disgusts me. 40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14. The other 40% are 14 year olds pretending to be 41. And the remaining 30% just copy pastes the longest message they can find in the chat. Grow up chat, grow up. 
twitch chat
Classic
I hate Twitch Chat
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
This guy's deck is CRAZY
twitchquotes:
This guy's deck is CRAZY!β β βMy deck can't win against a deck like thatβ β "He NEEDED precisely those two cards to win" β βHe topdecked the only card that could beat meβ β "He had the perfect cards" β βThere was nothing I could doβ β βI played that perfectlyβ
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Hearthstone
This Copypasta Is CRAZY!
How do I get my husband to stop going βGoblin Modeβ during sex?
How do I get my husband to stop going βGoblin Modeβ during sex?
TLDR; My husband says βGoblin Mode activatedβ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says βGoblin Mode offβ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward.
I really love my husband and heβs always been great in bed. But recently heβs been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in βGoblin Modeβ. We didnβt really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. Heβs an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time Iβve ever seen him cry. I think since then, heβs been a little emotionally unwell. Iβve heard him muttering, βGoblinβ repeatedly when he didnβt notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said βGoblin Mode activatedβ, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex Iβve ever had, but Iβm worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice?
Edit: The problem isnβt the βGoblin Modeβ, itβs that he could be ill
Confessions
Classic
GME to the moon
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