[Copypasta] My dad works at twitch dude

twitchquotes: My dad works at twitch dude, he's a sr Vice President, and he oversees players accounts. If you don't unban me, I'll make sure he gets both you and majinphil permabanned. But if you unban me, I'll make sure you fit in the algorithms to always have Phil be in people's recommended feed. Your choice.
twitch chat
August 2017
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

imagine how much weed Aang could smoke at once

Bro imagine how much weed Aang could smoke at once, like, he probably wouldn't even need a pipe to smoke a while oz of it he could just burn it with his firebending and use his airbending to bend the smoke into his lungs, which could hold a lot because he's an air bender, just imagine how much he could smoke, you pass him a full bowl and he just dumps it out into his hands and take the whole thing in one hit and asks for another, imagine how much weed he could go through in a single session since he's the Avatar and and could do as much as he wants since he won't green out he would just go into the Avatar state
January 2021

We require you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Reynad created the Hearth and the Stone

twitchquotes: In the beginning Reynad created the Hearth and the Stone. There were no cards nor a meta. Then Reynad said "Let there be cards"; and there were cards. He then said "Let there be a Meta"; and there was a Meta. ~ The Book of Dennisis
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Hearthstone

I'm going to kill that prosterino

twitchquotes: The Prostitute asks the Kripp, "Why don't you make a D3 video?" Kripp flies into a rage and hits her with an ornate salt shaker yelling, "I'm going to kill that prosterino!" When the cops finally caught him, after the 2 hour shootout, Kripp lies bleeding on the ground and mutters weakly to the sky..."I played that perfectly, nothing I coulda done cough what a joke.."
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Ditto

⠀⠀⠀⢠⡜⠛⠛⠿⣤⠀⠀⣤⡼⠿⠿⢧⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣀⡶⠎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠉⠶⠶⠉⠁⠀⠀⠈⠹⢆⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⡿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠶⠶⠶⠶⣆⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢣⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⣧⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠛⣧⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡼⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠿⢇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠶⠶⢆⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢣⣤ ⠀⣶⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⠀⠿⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣸⠿ ⠀⠀⠙⢳⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡞⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣶⣶⣶⣶⡞⠛⠃⠀
September 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing