[Copypasta] Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff

twitchquotes: Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff, executive producer for the Food Channel. We have reviewed your recent application to be a host of your own TV show on our network titled, "Salty Vegan Eats - A Pro Gamer's Way of Life" However, after further reviewing your claim of being an "extremely popular professional gamer" we found the evidence lacking. Mr. Octavian, casually playing a children's card game does not make you a "pro gamer." Have a nice day and good luck to your future endeavors.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

salty

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

Ben Brode and Firelands Portal

twitchquotes: Ben Brode here! We are happy to announce we have finally solved an issue that has plagued Hearthstone since beta. Despite our best efforts with cards like Flamecannon and Ethereal Conjurer, Mage was still able to lose games in Arena. With the Old Gods we introduced Faceless Summoner, and yet mage's average arena winrate was still only 75%. With the introduction of Firelands Portal, we hope to finally make Mage a viable arena class. 4Head
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp is a casual vegan

twitchquotes: Coke is not vegan. Vegans and vegetarians should note that a our drinks contain small traces of fish gelatine, which is used as a stabiliser for the beta-carotene colour. Not only is Kripp a casual gamer, he is a casual vegan as well!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Cybrix and the Head Chef of Dominos

twitchquotes: οΌ¨ο½…ο½Œο½Œο½γ€€οΌ£ο½™ο½‚ο½’ο½‰ο½˜οΌŒγ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½‰ο½“γ€€ο½‰ο½“γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€οΌ¨ο½…ο½ο½„γ€€οΌ£ο½ˆο½…ο½†γ€€ο½ο½†γ€€οΌ€ο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½ο½“β„’γ€€ο½—ο½…γ€€ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½…γ€€ο½Žο½ο½”ο½‰ο½ƒο½…ο½„γ€€ο½™ο½ο½•γ€€ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½…ο½Žβ€™ο½”γ€€ο½ο½’ο½„ο½…ο½’ο½…ο½„γ€€ο½†ο½ο½’γ€€οΌ’γ€€ο½„ο½ο½™ο½“οΌŒγ€€ο½—ο½…β€™ο½’ο½…γ€€ο½Šο½•ο½“ο½”γ€€ο½ƒο½ˆο½…ο½ƒο½‹ο½‰ο½Žο½‡γ€€ο½”ο½γ€€ο½“ο½…ο½…γ€€ο½‰ο½†γ€€ο½…ο½–ο½…ο½’ο½™ο½”ο½ˆο½‰ο½Žο½‡γ€€ο½‰ο½“γ€€ο½ο½‹ο½ο½™γ€€ο½ο½Žο½„γ€€ο½—ο½…β€™ο½–ο½…γ€€ο½ο½’ο½…ο½ο½ο½’ο½…ο½„γ€€ο½™ο½ο½•γ€€ο½γ€€ο½ƒο½ο½ο½ο½Œο½…ο½ο½…ο½Žο½”ο½ο½’ο½™γ€€ο½ο½‰ο½šο½šο½γ€€ο½ο½†γ€€ο½™ο½ο½•ο½’γ€€ο½†ο½ο½–ο½ο½•ο½’ο½‰ο½”ο½…γ€€ο½”ο½™ο½ο½…γ€€οΌˆοΌΈοΌΈοΌ¬γ€€ο½ο½Œο½ŒοΌο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½‡ο½“γ€€ο½ο½‰ο½šο½šο½οΌο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½…ο½„γ€€ο½ο½‰ο½šο½šο½γ€€ο½ο½‰ο½šο½šο½οΌο½“ο½”ο½•ο½†ο½†ο½…ο½„γ€€ο½ο½‰ο½šο½šο½γ€€ο½ƒο½’ο½•ο½“ο½”οΌ‰οΌŽγ€€οΌ³ο½…ο½…γ€€ο½™ο½ο½•γ€€ο½“ο½ο½ο½ŽοΌ
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Kripp gets married in a shack

twitchquotes: Rania: "why are you playing Diablo 3, Kripp? How can we afford Big Fat Greek Wedding with 5k Diablo viewers?" But the Kripp doesn't listen. He plays Diablo 3 and loses all his viewers and gets married in a shack.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. It's Seppuku or Harakiri.

twitchquotes: I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Nihongo (Japanese for you gaijin), and I’ve been involved in numerous study abroad trips to Japan, and I have memorized over 300 kanji characters. You need to learn that the correct term for ritual suicide is Seppuku or Harakiri. It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. Please educate yourselves.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
More Kripp Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing