[Copypasta] Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff

twitchquotes: Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff, executive producer for the Food Channel. We have reviewed your recent application to be a host of your own TV show on our network titled, "Salty Vegan Eats - A Pro Gamer's Way of Life" However, after further reviewing your claim of being an "extremely popular professional gamer" we found the evidence lacking. Mr. Octavian, casually playing a children's card game does not make you a "pro gamer." Have a nice day and good luck to your future endeavors.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

salty

What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp sends Hafu a romantic letter

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Hafu... Remember when i asked you to unleash your hounds on my freezing trap but instead you gave me an explosive shot to the face with your acidic swamp ooze? While i always love a good multishot to the face... you finished so quickly it fealt like i was having sex with Nozdormu or something... i mean, i am not just some succubus for you to shiv any time you please..
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

The emotion of the topdeck, the salt of the defeat

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp remember you don't play for the gold or for the wins, you play to feel the emotion on the topdick, the PJSalt on the defeat, you live for the BM, because you can be one with your cards, but mostly because at least through the match you're free. plz no linguini
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

I just spotted an inconsistency

twitchquotes: Wait a minute. I just spotted an inconsistency. Could this be the work of the CIA? Look closely... below the stream. "10,000 viewers". What the heck? There's only 7 million people in the world, how could there possibly be 10 million viewers right now?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Please remove Leifman's mod status

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, it has come to my attention that one of your mods "Leifman" has been abusing his authority as mod and banning people for no good reason. I would appreciate if you took some time out of your schedule to take action and remove his mod status. Thank you!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

In the name of Renly of House Baratheon

twitchquotes: ∩༼˵☯‿☯˵༽つ¤=[]:::::> In the name of Renly of House Baratheon, First of his name, rightful King of the Andals and the First Men. Lord of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm. I, Kripp of SoloMid, sentence you to die.<====]-o¯\_༼☯‿☯✿༽ノ
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing