[Copypasta] Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff

twitchquotes: Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff, executive producer for the Food Channel. We have reviewed your recent application to be a host of your own TV show on our network titled, "Salty Vegan Eats - A Pro Gamer's Way of Life" However, after further reviewing your claim of being an "extremely popular professional gamer" we found the evidence lacking. Mr. Octavian, casually playing a children's card game does not make you a "pro gamer." Have a nice day and good luck to your future endeavors.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

salty

I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Mr. Morosan, remove this wooden triangle

twitchquotes: There is one sign the Kripparrian can make that would be unmistakable, that would advance dramatically the cause of freedom and peace. General Secretary Morosan, if you seek peace, if you seek prosperity for Twitch and Youtube, if you seek liberalization, come here to this wooden triangle. Mr. Morosan, remove this wooden triangle. Mr. Morosan, tear down this wall!
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Kripp's next hoodie color

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Im excited to think of what the next hoodie color will be. This ones been going strong 20 days in a row now. Maybe we'll go back to the blue one or even the other light grey one that was worn for 30+ days. It's like a game now.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Brofist

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆ โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–„โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
February 2015
Kripp

Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name

twitchquotes: Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name. Thy Bad RNG come. Thy topdecks be done. On Arena as it is in Ranked. Give us this day our daily rant. And forgive us our button presses as we forgive those who don't press theirs against us. For thine is the never lucky. The bullsh*t RNG. Forever and ever. Ameno.
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp defending Blizzard on Diablo Immortal

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, video game journalist and decent human being here. Looking to get your thoughts on the disgusting response of entitled gamers to the Diablo Immortal reveal. On a scale from Hitler (least evil) to Straight White Male PC Gamer (most evil), how would you characterize those who criticize Blizzard? Hope to hear you are as unbiased as I am, thanks!
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp
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