[Copypasta] Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff

twitchquotes: Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff, executive producer for the Food Channel. We have reviewed your recent application to be a host of your own TV show on our network titled, "Salty Vegan Eats - A Pro Gamer's Way of Life" However, after further reviewing your claim of being an "extremely popular professional gamer" we found the evidence lacking. Mr. Octavian, casually playing a children's card game does not make you a "pro gamer." Have a nice day and good luck to your future endeavors.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

salty

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp needs to find a Romanian woman

twitchquotes: KRIPP! This is Papparian, your father! What is this I hear about marrying a Greek woman and making mini kripps with her??!! You need to find yourself a real full bodied Romanian woman, boy. One that can hand squeeze OJ and carry on our bloodline.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Hello I'm 13 year old from asia, name Lee Cheng Yun

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ɪᴍ 13 ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴏʟᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴀsɪᴀ, ɴᴀᴍᴇ ʟᴇᴇ ᴄʜᴇɴɢ ʏᴜɴ. ɪ ɴᴏ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ ᴡʜʏ ᴀʟʟ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇᴍsᴇʟғ? ᴡʜʏ ᴀʟʟ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅ ғᴀᴄᴇs ɪɴ ᴛʜɪs ᴄʜᴀᴛ? ɪ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀʀᴅs ɪɴ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛʜsᴛᴏɴᴇ, ɪ ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴘᴀᴄᴋ ғɪɴᴅ ᴍɪʟʜᴏᴜsᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴜsᴇ ɪɴ ᴍʏ ᴢᴏᴏ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Kripp meets Gordon Ramsay

twitchquotes: Kripp meets Gordan Ramsay behind the kitchen, gently caressing his body, he mutters "hey say that word again, and say it like you mean it" "ORE-GAHHHNO" Ramsey softly whispers into kripps ear, as he gets chills throughout his body "oh you know i love it when you say that, now give me my daily dose of OMEEGA 3" as Ramsey inserts his sausage into kripps prepared packag
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

This guy's brofist is CRAZY

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's brofist is CRAZY!” ☑ “My knuckles can't win against a fist like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely those 2 fingers to win" ☑ “He brofisted the only sub that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect fist ☑ “There was nothing I could fist” ☑ “I fisted that perfectly”
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

This is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend Incorporated

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has legend) as you no longer are a "never legend". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp
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