twitchquotes:
in germany we have a beautiful saying if you like a girl "deine mutter lutscht schwänze in der hölle" it means your smile brightens my day 
Please no copy pasta
Please no copy pasta
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What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front
twitchquotes:
Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front. When it comes to sexuality, I'm about as hetero as they come. If a gay guy came on to me, I'd be like, "No way, bro. I'm a straight-up party boy who's into chicks." Yup, one gay dude wouldn't stand a chance. It would take at least four or five gay guys strapping me down to make it inside me. Sorry, fellas, that's just how straight I am. And even then I wouldn't make it easy. I'd be like, "Hey look! There goes George Michael!" And they'd all shriek "Where?!" at once, and I'd make a break for it, and they'd be like, "He's getting away! Chase him! I want his butt!" But I wouldn't just give them my butt. They'd have to take it. And once they got me strapped down, I'd stop fighting it because that would be giving them what they want. And I don't want them to enjoy it. If anyone's going to enjoy it, it's going to be me. So, I'd just relax into it and taunt them by telling them how ripped and sexy I find them and letting them know how much I'm enjoying myself. So, even though I'd have a bunch of ripped guys all taking turns on my butt, I'd still be enjoying it. But only because I forced myself to. It's not like I could fight these guys off. There are too many of them and they want me too much. What am I, Chuck Norris?" I'm not against homosexuality, though. I say to each his own. You're free to do whatever you want.
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KappaPride
100% chance to have less FREEDOM AND LIBERTY
twitchquotes:
(ʘ͡ ʖ͜ ʘ͡ ง) I AM EUROFAG. I have a 100% chance to have less FREEDOM AND LIBERTY than a citizen of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA (ʘ͡ ʖ͜ ʘ͡ ง)
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Kripp
EU vs NA
Why is my BLACK friend so racist?
So I was playing chess with my BLACK friend the other day and something rather curious happened. As we were about to start playing he asked, “Could I play as white this time?” Why is my BLACK friend being so racist????? Clearly your color doesn’t matter and as privileged white man myself I could not bear listening to these words!!!!!! Black? White? It’s all the same guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chess
Go back to playing Grim Yawn Kripp
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripp! This is famous game designer, Eddy Pasterino. I am very glad to see you playing my new game Hearthstone . However i must ask you stop playing now as you are making it look boring as hell and as always Dongerino Al Pacino go back to playing Grim Yawn.
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Kripp
Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers
It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.